


I'll Take You For Who You Are (if you'll take me for everything)

by WeezlBot



Category: Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rick Riordan, The Heroes of Olympus - Rick Riordan, The Trials of Apollo - Rick Riordan
Genre: Bullying, Cuddling & Snuggling, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, F/F, F/M, Falling In Love, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Julia Feingold Can't Deal With Feelings, Julia bullies Kayla, Kayla was abandoned on the steps of the Big House as a baby, Lou Ellen Blackstone Can't Deal With Feelings, M/M, Memes, Mentions of parental abandonment, Minor Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Minor Suicidal Thoughts, Nico di Angelo is a Good Friend, PTSD episodes, Panic Attacks, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Protective Nico, Rejection, Self-Harm, Slow Burn (but not really bc I suck at slow burn), Vocaloid References, also this starts off talking about Lou Ellen but it's actually Kayla-centric, author is a fool, because she can't just say that she's really into her, playing with hair
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-10
Updated: 2021-03-04
Packaged: 2021-03-14 07:01:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 19
Words: 39,029
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28666638
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WeezlBot/pseuds/WeezlBot
Summary: Kayla just can't catch a break.Julia from Hermes won't stop picking on her. Lou Ellen is mad at her and she doesn't know why. It doesn't help that she's nursing a secret crush on the daughter of Hecate. When things boil over, and Lou Ellen cruelly rejects her, what will happen? How will she rebuild? And seriously, what the hell is up with Julia?Featuring emotionally constipated Julia, a Lou Ellen who takes her anger out on all the wrong people, an Alice who just wants to keep Julia from hurting anyone too badly, a Cecil who just wants to keep Will and Lou Ellen from harm while making sure no one else gets hurt, loving Austin, hurt-but-still-a-sweetheart Will, a Nico who proves an unlikely friend, and Kayla, who's just trying to get out of this without hurling herself from the Empire State.The issues outlined in the tags are significant and possibly reoccurring issues in the fic. For your own sake, do not take the tags lightly. No physical abuse/rape/non-con will take place in this fic, but it is mentioned. This will be no more severe/adult in content and nature than what is written in the drabble doc.Eventual Julia/Kayla.NO INAPPROPRIATE CONTACT WILL OCCUR BETWEEN CHILDREN!
Relationships: Kayla Knowles/Julia Feingold (eventually), Lou Ellen Blackstone/Cecil Markowitz (minor), Lou Ellen Blackstone/Kayla Knowles (one-sided), Nico di Angelo/Will Solace
Comments: 14
Kudos: 32





	1. I May Be A Jerk

**Author's Note:**

> Those of you who read my drabble doc don't need to read this note. Those of you who haven't might want to, as it explains some stuff that gets referenced in this fic.  
> This is the note regarding Lou Ellen's father, as written in my drabble doc. "Basically I headcannoned that Will lived with Lou and Cecil for a while (I used to think it was about 7 years, now I'm not so sure) following some extenuating family circumstances. Lou's father (Louis) took him in, which seemed like a good thing until he turned out to be a pedophile. Anyway, that's the short version. Sorry for angst/cringe/edge." 
> 
> Kayla's mortal father abandoned her on the steps of the Big House as a baby. He couldn't deal with the emotions raising such a strange child brought up in him, so he drove her to a place where he knew she'd be safe and left her.

Lou Ellen was sitting in the Hecate cabin, pre-prepping a set of candles with tears streaming down her face. 

She was alone. She was always alone. There was nothing left anymore. Her father had hurt Will, had hurt Cecil, had hurt everyone he’d ever known, and no one had ever told her. The blood flowing in her veins was pure evil. Her mother was a traitor and her father… she wasn’t able to think about that yet.

Cecil and Will were somewhere in the cabin behind her. Will was crying. Will cried about everything. Will cried all the time. Maybe her father was why. She couldn’t bear it. She was ready to stick her head in the boiling water of the nearby cauldron and drown herself. She wanted to think Cecil and Will would stop her, but even then she wasn’t sure.

“Lou?” Cecil was calling her name. 

“What?” She could barely speak. “What the fuck do you want? Why are you still talking to me?” 

Cecil was quiet for a moment. “... It’s not your fault, you know,” he finally said. “You couldn’t have done shit. He was too good at hiding, at intimidating. It isn’t your fault. No one’s blaming you.”

“Shut the fuck up. You’re not the victim here.”

Will padded softly across the tiny cabin, wrapping his arms around her waist and burying his face in her shoulder. Lou gulped a sob. Will’s mercy flowed freely as always, and it hurt, it  _ really  _ hurt. Will’s arms were warm and sturdy and it burned. She could feel his chest jerking, he was crying too, and it wasn’t fucking  _ fair.  _ Why did it have to be  _ her  _ dad that was the freak? Why not somebody else’s dad, or a childless man? Why did it have to be  _ her  _ that was the spawn of evil? 

Why her?

Tears of rage poured down her cheeks, making Will’s embrace feel much too stifling. She pushed him away, gently, trying to ignore the visible hurt in his eyes when she did so. 

“Would you like some space?” Cecil asked gently.

She nodded.

“Okay. I’ll take this one back to the Apollo cabin. Make him nice and comfy, maybe get Nico to give him some cuddles. How does that sound, Will?”

Will walked back to Cecil, leaning against him.  
“Good, good. Lou, I’ll check on you in an hour or so, okay?”

Lou nodded. 

“Don’t fucking hurt yourself. I’ll kill you if you hurt yourself.”

Lou flipped him off.

Cecil sighed, helping Will to his feet. Will turned to Lou Ellen. “... Thanks… for believing me.”

Lou didn’t reply. She couldn’t reply. She buried her face in her knees and cried softly as the two boys slowly, reluctantly left the cabin.

  
  
  
  


Meanwhile, Kayla was shooting off arrows. 

It was a slow day. The first day after summer ended always was. The camp always felt weird and slow and tired. Normally she just slept through it, but this time Austin had roused her with sleepy cuddles and… how could she have resisted? She was trying to stave off the exhaustion and loneliness with archery, but she could only barely hit the targets. She just wanted to sleep. 

Someone came shrieking in behind her. “I need an Apollo kid!”

Kayla turned. It was one of the Hermes kids, Alice. Her glasses were askew on her nose. Her black hair was stuck to her face. She was overly sweaty, way sweatier than any human being should be on a sixty-degree day. Kayla raised her eyes. “What’s going on?”

“Julia,” panted Alice. “She’s burned all over.”

Kayla ran towards her. “What happened?”

“Climbing wall, she slipped and… oh, gods…” Alice’s voice broke. 

“Okay, okay. Where’s Will?”

“Couldn’t find him!”

“Fuck. Okay. I… still, why  _ me?  _ Julia hates me!”

“I don’t know who else to ask, I can’t find anyone else even…” Alice’s voice broke and her glasses fogged, “... even remotely qualified to help!”

Kayla ran to comfort her. “Okay. Okay. I’m on my way. Shit, I don’t carry aloe, do I? Of course I fucking don’t, I’m a disaster. Here, we’ll bring her to the infirmary and I’ll… I’ll do my best, okay?”

“Okay!” Alice took off running.

Kayla followed. They were by the climbing wall in seconds. Julia was sitting on the ground, holding her arm, which was blistered from her shoulder to halfway to her wrist. Her breathing was heavy. A singed spot decorated the tip of one of her brilliant red braids, making it look like a paintbrush. Kayla ran up and took a knee next to her. “Okay. Let’s get some ambrosia and nectar on that.”

Julia grumbled, looking up at Alice. “Alice, I told you…”

“I know,” Alice replied, shuffling her feet. “She was the only one I could find.”

“I know I’m not as good of a healer as Will, but I can still give ambrosia and nectar. And frankly, I think that’ll be all you need,” Kayla huffed. 

“I don’t need anything from  _ you,”  _ Julia snapped.

Kayla shrunk in on herself. “... If you don’t want my help, I can go, I just…”

“No!” Alice cut in. “Please stay! She needs it, she’s just…”

Julia shot Alice a warning look.

“... not good with people!”

_ A Hermes kid? Not good with people?  _ thought Kayla.  _ Perhaps I need to reevaluate my prejudices.  _ “Well, that’s something we can excuse her for. Now, is she gonna come to the infirmary or not?”

“No,” growled Julia. 

“Yes!” begged Alice. 

Julia was silent for a moment before standing up. “Don’t fuck this up, Knowles. Miyazawa, as always, I better not regret this bullshit.” 

Alice grinned at her. “As always, you won’t.”

Kayla led them to the infirmary and sat Julia down on the nearest chair. Kayla quickly rubbed ambrosia paste over Julia’s arm, trying to ignore Julia’s piercing scowl on the back of her head. She watched as the blisters went down, as the skin healed. Once the irritation seemed better, she wrapped it closely in a bandage and moved away. “Okay. You’re good.”

“Will would have done it better,” Julia grumbled.

“True,” Kayla sighed.

Julia huffed. “I bet it’ll get infected in, like, days.”

“If you hate it, you can find Will and make him redo my work.”

Julia was quiet. She rose up off the chair and walked out the door, silently closing it behind her.

“I’m sorry,” Alice said immediately. “She doesn’t hate you, I swear. She’s not a hateful person. She just has… she has some anger issues, that’s all.”

“She just takes it out on me?”

Alice nodded. “Yeah.”

“Wow. I’m glad I’ve got archery as an outlet. I don’t want to end up a jerk like that.”

Julia slammed the door open again. “I may be a jerk, but at least I’m not the person who had two dads who  _ both  _ abandoned her.”

Kayla couldn’t respond. Her eyes stung. She stared at her knees, left bare by her jean shorts, and hugged herself. 

“Freak,” continued Julia.

“Will you  _ stop?” _ Alice cut in. “She’s gonna cry. Do you want to see her cry?”

“Maybe I do!” Julia snapped. “I mean, what’s gonna happen if she cries? Her brothers come in and give her huggie-wuggies and make evewything aww bettew?” Julia’s voice dripped with sarcasm. “She gets a shitload of attention and derails all Apollo cabin operations for the rest of the day. Gods forbid any of us should need healing.”

Kayla rocked back and forth. “... I… I’m sorry.”

"Oh, don’t be like that. You’re not gonna change and neither will your brothers.” Julia turned and left, slamming the door behind her.

Alice put her hand on Kayla’s back. “... I’m sorry about her.”

Kayla stood up, wiping her eyes on her sleeve. “Not your fault. I’m gonna… I’m gonna… go. I’ll see you around.”

“See you, Kay.”


	2. Holding Your Scarred Heart In Hand

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There is self harm in this chapter, so be warned. This is not a self-harm-centric fic, however. I'm not writing another TTLCO.

Kayla made her way to the Hecate cabin. 

She knew Lou Ellen wasn’t a good person to go to in times of distress. She knew what she was doing was stupid. But she did it anyway. Lou Ellen had always drawn her in. There was something about her that was fascinating to Kayla. Lou wasn’t particularly poised, or well-mannered, or even necessarily  _ kind.  _ But something kept Kayla coming round, continuing to attempt friendship, to attempt affection. It had taken her way too long to figure out what it actually was. 

She pushed through the burgundy curtains that covered the door. Lou Ellen was kneeling by her cauldron. “Hey, Lou.”

“What do you want?” Lou’s voice was hollow and angry.

“... Why are you mad at me?” asked Kayla. “Why is everybody mad at me today?”

“I don’t fucking know, Kay,” Lou huffed. “Either way, what do you want?”

Kayla shifted her feet. “... I… uh… just to hang out, I guess.”

Lou Ellen let out an audible grumble. “Why the fuck do you want to hang out with me?”

Kayla studied her. Her hair hung in thick onyx ringlets around her round cheeks. Her violet eyes were slightly puffy. Kayla wanted to comfort her, but didn’t know how. “... Because I like you, I guess?”

Lou Ellen snorted. “I’m calling bullshit.”

“... Um… I… but…”

“Are you gonna sit down or not?”

Kayla perched on the edge of the bed. “Why are you mad at me?”

“I’m not,” Lou grumbled. “I just don’t know why the fuck you want to talk to me.”

Kayla was quiet for a long time. Her eyes stung and she blinked back tears. “... Julia was being mean to me again.”

“Dude, she hates you. Just don’t worry about her.”

“But Alice said…”

“I don’t give a fuck for what Alice said!” shouted Lou Ellen. “If she acts like she hates you, she hates you! Why are you trying to say any different? Are you gay for her or something?”

Kayla thought of kissing Julia Feingold and nearly laughed. “No, I’m not into her. She’s mean.”

“Why are you laughing?” Lou asked. “I wasn’t trying to be funny.”

“I just thought the fact that you thought I was into Julia was funny,” Kayla defended.

Lou was quiet for a moment. “Well, I’m not in the mood to dispense a ton of sympathy, so I don’t really know why you’re here.”

Kayla swallowed. “I… can you… it hurts, though, can you at least  _ try?” _

Lou Ellen snorted. “What do you want, a hug?”

“No, I… I don’t know, I just want… I just want compassion, you know?” Kayla’s voice cracked. “You’re like my best friend, can’t you spare some?”

“You’re my friend’s little sister, Kay,” huffed Lou Ellen. “We’re cool, sure, but we’re not best friends, and it would be wise to not delude yourself that we are.”

Kayla whimpered, tears trickling down her cheeks. She hugged herself. “... I… but I…”

“But what, you wanna be best friends? Look, Kaykay, I don’t care. I don’t need friends, much less best ones. I’m fine.”  _ I only manage to hurt them. _

“So what, you’re just never gonna make another friend again?” snapped Kayla. “You’re just gonna stay alone forever? Ignore the fact that you’ve got Cecil and Will and Nico and Miranda and I trying to be your friend? What the hell is wrong with you?” Kayla didn’t mean to yell, but she couldn’t sit there and be insulted and treated cruelly anymore. It just hurt too much.

Lou Ellen looked coldly at her. “There’s nothing wrong with me. Nothing! Fucking nothing!” Her voice crescendoed to a shout. “And you’re fucking stupid if you think there’s something wrong with me! Why are you even fucking here, just to bother me? Just to pick a fight?”

“No! I came here because I care about you and I was hurting and I thought you would comfort me! I love you! I thought maybe… maybe…” She trailed off, gulping a sob.

Lou huffed. “What, are you gay for  _ me  _ now?”

“Maybe!” 

Kayla’s defiant shout was the only sound in the cabin for almost a whole minute. Finally, Lou Ellen turned. “I think it’s time for you to leave.”

Kayla was silent. She hiccuped back sobs as she stood up, leaving the cabin. She replayed the conversation in her head, over and over. Why the hell had she said  _ maybe?  _ She could have changed the subject, she could have lied. Granted, her tell would have gone off. She didn’t  _ like  _ slapping herself in the face per se, but it still would have been better than this. Even if she’d turned tail and ran straight out the door, it would have been better than this. Lou Ellen couldn’t even listen to small talk in her current state, much less carry on a deep emotional conversation regarding the state of Kayla’s romantic affections. Why the fuck had she run her mouth like that? Why the fuck was she so  _ stupid? _

She pushed into the Apollo cabin. Will was curled up in his bed, Cecil and Nico by his side. Cecil raised his eyebrows when he saw her. “What’s wrong?”

“Lou Ellen… we had a fight,” was all Kayla was able to choke. She pulled a small bundle from her footlocker and stormed into the bathroom. Cecil said something, but she couldn’t hear what it was. She locked the door, slumping against the door and hiccuping hard.  _ I’m so fucking stupid. I should just… fuck off and die, right? Or something?  _

_ Gods damn it… _

She sobbed quietly, unwrapping the bundle. It was a too-small shirt wrapped around an X-Acto knife. She pressed the point into the soft pale skin of her arm, quickly making the cut. She didn’t register any of the pain. She hadn’t properly registered pain in years. 

With a gurgled sob, she remembered that Lou Ellen had been the one who got her into hurting herself. 

Someone grabbed her wrist. She slapped at the intruder, sobbing out loud.  _ Just a nuisance… will her brothers hug it aww bettew? She’ll get a shitload of attention and derail Apollo cabin operations for the rest of the day…  _ “Don’t touch me!”

The hand moved to her knife, yanking on it hard. Kayla wailed and pulled back. “I have a right! Don’t take it!”

The hand pulled harder and the knife slipped from her hand. She hit the person as hard as she could. A low grunt escaped him. “Hey, don’t hit me.”

Kayla looked up, right into the dark eyes of Nico di Angelo. She whimpered and looked back at the tile. “... I’m so-o-oo so-orry,” she quavered. “I… I didn’t want to… to hurt you…”

“I thought you were going to kill yourself,” Nico murmured, almost shockedly. “You were… when you put the knife on your wrist, you…”

“I’m sorry,” she whispered.

“Do you have any idea how  _ heartbroken  _ Will and Austin would be if you died? How the hell can you even  _ think  _ of hurting or killing yourself when you have brothers who love you this much?” 

Kayla thought of how Will had held on to her at Michael’s funeral and choked out another sob. “... I… I’m so sorry… I’m so sorry…”

“Why did you do this? Why didn’t you let Will or Austin or somebody help you?”

Kayla stared at Nico’s knees, his ripped jeans revealing scarred skin. “... Julia told me… she told me…” A whimper escaped her throat. “... she told me that if I went to them for reassurances all I’d be was a nuisance who would hold up Apollo cabin operations for the rest of the day.”

Nico huffed. “I’ll tell Cecil to get his sister in check. But I thought you had a fight with Lou Ellen, not Julia.”

Kayla hiccuped and dissolved into quiet sobs. Nico, to his credit, only waited patiently for her to compose herself. It was a moment before she spoke, tears still dribbling from reddened eyes as she curled her knees to her chest. “... We… we… I went to talk to her and she… she was mad, and I kept asking her... whether or not... she was mad at me, and she wouldn’t give me a straight answer, and… we started yelling... at each other and… and…” Another whimper escaped Kayla’s lips. 

Nico gave her a piece of tissue. “Here. Wipe your face.”

Kayla whimpered, but accepted. She cleaned her face and blew her nose. “... I… She asked me why… why I wanted to talk to her. I told her it was because… I loved her. She asked me ‘what, are you gay for me?’” She trailed off.

Nico looked at the ceiling, saw the repaired spot where Clarisse had tried to axe into the cabin. “... And what did you say?”

Kayla whimpered and rocked back and forth. 

Nico stayed quiet. 

“... Maybe,” she finally whispered.

Nico was quiet for a moment. “... And what did she say?”

“... She told… me… it was time to… it was time for me to leave.”

Nico extended his hand, and Kayla took it. She held on to Nico’s hand like a lifeline and cried. 


	3. Kindness of a Friend

It was a while before she began to calm down. 

She was resting her cheek on her knee, rocking back and forth, clinging to Nico’s hand with one hand and holding her legs with the other. “... Thanks,” Kayla whispered, finally, releasing Nico’s hand and wrapping her arm around her legs. 

“No problem,” murmured Nico. “Happy to help.”

Kayla wiped her eyes, standing up. She still looked miserable. Her lip was twitching slightly.

Nico followed. “Hey… Kayla?”

“What?”

“Lou Ellen doesn’t hate you. She’s in… look, her father did some really bad stuff, and…”

“Wait, I thought her father was dead.”

“He is,” Nico confirmed. “But in life, he did some terrible things she didn’t know about, and Lou Ellen just found out about some of it today. Either way, what I’m trying to say is that she’s heartbroken and angry and she’s just not dealing with it well. That’s why she got mad. Not because she hates you.”

Kayla looked back at Nico. “... Thanks. That… that helps. A little bit. Not much, but it helps.”

“I know,” Nico sighed. “Are you sure you don’t want me to get Will? He would be able to help more than I can.”

“No, I… all I need is some fresh air. I’ll be fine.” Kayla swallowed.

“May I tell Will what happened, or would you like me to keep it a secret?”

Kayla sighed. “Go ahead and tell people. Lou Ellen’s gonna spill the beans anyway. Besides, I don’t really fucking… I mean, Will’s been out for like four or five years now and he’s done just fine. Tell whoever. I don’t give a fuck.”

Nico nodded. “Whatever keeps you comfortable.”

“Thanks.” Kayla took a breath. “Seriously. It means a lot.”

Nico nodded. “We’re good.”

Kayla turned to leave. “I’ll see you, Nico.”

“See you, Kay. I’ll be here if you need me, okay?”

Kayla looked at him. He looked compassionate, warm, which was a strange thing to see on his face, but not an unwelcome one. “Thanks, Nico. You’ve… you’ve been far too kind.”

Nico’s lip twitched. “Hardly. Bye, Kay.”

Kayla nodded. “Bye, Neeks.”

  
  


Kayla spent the rest of the day sitting against a rock by the canoe lake, watching the canoes go by. Sometimes she cried, sometimes she sat in silence and thought. She thought about many things, about Lou Ellen, about Cecil, about Nico and Will, about Manhattan, about the Battle of the Labyrinth, about self-harm, about how now, she'd have to find someone new to be in love with. She'd defined her last three years of life about being in love with Lou Ellen. She didn't know what to do if she wasn't in love.

At some point, she drifted off to sleep and woke up with a stiff back. She dreamt of terrible things, of Lou Ellen's furious face, of the retreating back of the mortal father she had never known, of Julia's mockery, of Michael on the bridge, of Apollo being sucked into Chaos and devoured, of Lee's crushed head. She woke up in cold sweats with a sour taste in her mouth.

She didn’t move from the spot until dinnertime. The Apollo-kid table felt nearly deserted without Jerry and Gracie and Yan. She knew they’d had no choice but to go home--Yan’s mother wouldn’t let her miss school, Gracie got too badly homesick and Jerry had to help his chronically ill mother care for his little brother--but she still wished they could stay year-round. Especially now, she could have used the distraction.

Will held out his arms as she approached the table. She forced herself not to run towards him, walking normally and leaning into his embrace as she sat down. Will wrapped her tightly against him, burying his face in her hair. “Nico told me everything,” he whispered. 

“I’m… I’m sorry.”

“Don’t you dare apologize.” Will’s voice was barely audible. “Don’t you dare.”

Kayla hung against his chest for a moment before pulling away. “... Thanks,” she whispered. “I… I needed that.”

“Same,” Will murmured, tucking back into his food. It was pizza night. “Same. And Cecil talked to Julia, so I don’t think she’ll be bothering you for a bit.”

“Thanks. Yeah, I don’t know why she hates me so much.”

Will pursed his lips. “Yeah, I don’t know either.” 

“Mm. Maybe jealousy?” Austin cut in through a mouthful of pizza.

“Why the hell would she be jealous of me?” 

“Maybe just because you don’t have to be a head counselor? I dunno,” Austin shrugged. “Or maybe because of your archery skills? You are on track for the Olympics, after all.”

“She doesn’t give a fuck for archery, though,” sighed Kayla. 

“She could be gay for you,” Will suggested. “Honestly, I see more men do this than women, but sometimes people bully those they like if they feel like they can’t talk to them.”

Kayla snorted. “Nah. She’s not in love with me. Couldn’t be.”

Will winked. “We’ll see.”

Kayla elbowed him. “Shut up.”

Will laughed. “I’m just saying you should keep your mind open. People are strange sometimes.”

“I know that. I just can’t see Julia having feelings for me,” Kayla sighed, shaking her head. 

Will shrugged. “Alright, man. Think what you think.”

There was a silence. Kayla felt eyes on her. When she turned, Julia was staring at her, not an angry stare, just a plain, neutral stare. 

When she caught Julia’s eyes, she immediately turned away.


	4. It's All The Same

After dinner, Lou Ellen approached her as she walked off the pavilion. 

Kayla was silent. She only looked at her, saw her violet eyes cast down, her arms crossed over her full breasts. She loved those eyes, sparkly as amethyst when she was happy. 

“I’m sorry,” Lou Ellen whispered. “I shouldn’t have been so mean to you. You didn’t do anything bad.”

Kayla didn’t respond for a very long time. “... You’re not mad about…?”

“Because you’re in love with me? Naw, I’m not mad. I’m a little flattered, honestly.” Lou Ellen paused for a long time. She looked around the pavilion, meeting Cecil’s eyes from where he and Julia and Alice were leaving the pavilion. He gave her a thumbs-up of support. “I’m gonna be honest, though, I don’t return the feelings.”

Kayla must have looked devastated, because Lou Ellen continued. “Nothing against you, I’m just not into women like that.”

“That’s… fine.” Kayla’s voice broke. 

“... You need a hug, or…?”

Kayla couldn’t take it. “Nope. I don’t need anything from you.” She turned and ran away, ignoring Lou Ellen and Will and Austin’s shouts for her to come back. 

She wound up behind the Apollo cabin, rocking back and forth with her head between her knees.  _ Why do the Fates hate me so much? Why couldn’t she be into women, just a little bit? Did I piss off Aphrodite somehow?  _ She bit down on her knuckles, trying to stifle her sobs before someone heard.  _ It hurts. It hurts. Why her? Why  _ me?  _ Did I do something wrong? Why couldn’t I have fallen for anyone else? Why?  _ She clenched her jaw. Tears and snot were running down her face.  _ I hate you, Aphrodite, Eros, you two awful, awful bastards…  _

It was a while before she felt good enough to stand up. 

She took a few deep breaths and wiped her eyes, raising herself up shakily. She felt sick. She wanted her brothers, she wanted Nico, she wanted sympathy, but shame coiled in her gut at the mere thought of it. Julia’s words from earlier still rang in her head,  _ … holding up Apollo cabin operations for the rest of the day. _

No. She would deal with it on her own. All she needed was a few deep breaths. Maybe a short walk. Yeah. She’d take a little walk, go to campfire. That would cheer her up. Seeing Will and Austin happy would always lift her spirits. 

She turned to leave and walked smack into Julia Feingold.

“What do you want?” she snapped.

Julia looked legitimately speechless. Kayla continued. “Look, I know Markowitz probably ran his jaw about everything that happened between me and Lou Ellen earlier today. I don’t know if you’re a lesbophobe or a biphobe or if you just hate me, but I’m not in a mood to hear it. I’ve had a really fucking awful day, and it started with your ass, and I refuse to let it end with your ass.”

“I… um…” Julia’s jaw was hanging open.

Kayla growled. “Fuck off, Julia. Just fuck off.”

Julia nodded stiffly. She turned on her heels and ran.

Kayla walked alone to campfire, flopping down next to Austin and leaning her head on his shoulder.

“You okay?” Austin asked. 

“... Bad day,” she whispered. “Really bad day.”

Austin took her in a hug. “Poor little Kaykay.”

Nico leaned over from where he sat next to Will. “Is she okay?”

Kayla shook her head.

Nico and Will moved over to wrap their arms around her. She swallowed hard, trying not to start crying again. She didn’t even know if she had any water in her body left to cry. Her head ached. She could barely keep her eyes open. 

“Do you want me to take you back to the cabin?” Nico asked. “I don’t like campfire much, I’m fine to skip it. I’m honestly only here because Will is.”

Kayla swallowed. “... No, I’m… I’m fine. I can stay. I’ll be fine.”

Nico nodded, although she could still see a vague look of concern on his face. “Okay. Say something if it gets to be too much, okay? Don’t overdo it.”

“Hypocrite,” Will accused. 

Kayla gave a watery smile. “Alright, Nico. Will do.”

Will stuck out his tongue at Nico before grabbing a megaphone and pulling the campers into a rendition of “My Mother was a Minotaur”. Kayla didn’t sing. She didn’t have the energy. Nico was mouthing along for the good of Will’s ears. Will wouldn’t say it, but Nico’s singing voice was shockingly bad.

Kayla rested her head on Austin’s shoulder and let her mind go blank.


	5. She Thinks You're Perfect (and she's as jealous of you as Zeus is of a pretty girl's husband)

Kayla didn’t sleep well that night. 

Despite how tired she was, she couldn’t get to sleep for hours, and when she did, nightmares plagued her. She saw Michael on the bridge, falling, falling, except when he hit the water he shattered like glass, all his little pieces floating away into the river. Then she was running endlessly, endlessly in the dark, unable to see more than a foot in front of her face. When she broke into the light, she was in the amphitheatre, except instead of the normal campers, it was some two hundred clones of Julia Feingold, who took one look at her and exploded in laughter, jeering, shrieking… hateful. She turned to run, but she was alone in the middle of the amphitheatre and all the gates were locked. 

She woke up in a cold sweat. 

The horn blew just a moment later, dawn light filtering through the window. She heard Will groan loudly from where he lay in bed. “It can’t be morning yet.”

Kayla sighed. “It is.”

“Of course,” Austin grumbled.

“I call first shower,” Kayla huffed. She climbed down from her top-bunk bed and pulled some clean clothes from her footlocker. Austin made a groan of complaint, but didn’t go any further. Will didn’t even make a noise. He hadn’t stirred from his bed.

Kayla showered off quickly. She pulled on her clothes, grabbed her bow and left the cabin, wanting to shoot off a few arrows before breakfast. She pushed through the gates of the archery range and ran smack into Alice Miyazawa.

“Oh, hey,” Kayla sighed. She grabbed an arrow and shot it off. Dead bullseye.

“Did you yell at Julia yesterday?”

“I’m assuming Cecil told you what happened with Lou Ellen and I?”

Alice nodded. “Yeah. He did. And then… I overheard your conversation on the dining pavilion. I… I’m sorry, by the way.” 

Kayla focused in on another arrow. “... It’s… not your problem. Anyway, yes, I did yell at Julia, and it was because she ambushed me behind the Apollo cabin when I was really upset and I wasn’t about to let her bully me any more. I’m sorry if I hurt her feelings, but I’m really fucking done with her bullshit, especially after yesterday.”

“I think she was more shocked than hurt, honestly. She kept telling me she didn’t expect you to fight back,” Alice laughed. “But there is one thing that did really hurt her, however. Did you accuse her of homophobia?”

“I believe what I said was ‘I’m not sure if you’re a lesbophobe, a biphobe or if you just hate me’,” Kayla responded. “So… yes? I guess so? But not in a hardcore serious sense.”

“Yeah.” Alice paused. “That… that really hurt her.”

“Well, good to know that she just hates me, then,” Kayla huffed. 

Alice shook her head. “She doesn’t hate you, though. I know it’s hard to believe, but it’s true.”

“Why the hell does she treat me so badly every time I see her, then?”

“She’s… got some complicated feelings towards you,” Alice mused. “I think she’s jealous of you on some level.”

“Why?”

“She thinks you’re perfect.”

Kayla dropped her bow and arrow. “What?”

“I mean, you’re athletic, you’ve got the Apollo kid smarts, you’re sweet and charming, you’ve got two older brothers who would do anything for you--and after Travis and Connor left for college, I think that’s something Julia’s really been missing. She also keeps bringing up the fact that as soon as you expressed a desire to try for the Olympics Chiron found you an older Apollo kid to train under and made sure you got to lessons and paid for everything and all, and trained you himself once that fell through, but when she told Chiron she wanted to become an internationally renowned thief he told her off,” Alice laughed.

Kayla gave Alice an incredulous look. “Does she even realize how being an Olympic athlete and being a major criminal are different?”

“Julia’s always said that the people with the screwiest morals are the most fun.”

Kayla snorted. “Makes sense.”

Alice was quiet for a moment. She scuffed her feet in the packed earth of the archery range, raising up small dust clouds. “Anyway… just out of curiosity, your bed is the top bunk in the third bed on the left, right?”

“Why the hell do you know that?”

“Cecil told me,” Alice responded.

“It’s still weird,” Kayla huffed. “But yeah, it is. Why do you want to know?”

“Just curious,” Alice shrugged. “You’re interesting. I’d like to get to know you better.”

Kayla’s lips twitched into a small smile. “Thanks. Maybe once you get to know me you can assure Julia of the disaster I truly am inside.”

Alice snorted. “Yeah. Will do.”

The horn blew. Alice turned. “Seeya, Kay.” She broke into a sprint, tearing off towards the dining pavilion with all of Hermes’s speed.

When Kayla arrived at the dining pavilion, the campers were humming with anticipation. She sat down next to Austin and flicked his cheek. “‘Sup, Aussie?”

Austin paused mid-bite of waffle. “... Never call me that again.”

Kayla laughed. “All right, all right. But seriously, what’s going on?”

“Oh, Capture the Flag is tonight. Should be pretty quiet, though.”

“Who are we with?” 

“Athena, um… Nico, obviously. I think we’ve got Chiara and Aphrodite, too. We’ve got Hephaestus.” Austin counted on his fingers. “We also have Clovis. I’m thinking we just park his pudgy behind on top of the flag and have him sleep on it.”

“Not Hecate?” 

“No,” Will replied. “We figured that… after what happened yesterday, it might be nice if you and Lou Ellen got a little break from each other.”

Kayla nodded morosely. “... Yeah. Who are we up against?”

“Ares. Damien. Demeter. Butch. Hecate, obviously. Paolo. Oh, yeah, and Hermes.”

“So… we’ve got four useful cabins and they have five?” she asked.

“Yeah, but we have the Big Three kid,” nodded Austin. “As creepy as you may think Nico is, you have to admit, he’s really fucking powerful.”

“I don’t think Nico’s creepy.” She cast her eyes over to where Nico was sitting with Dionysus. “He actually was really nice to me yesterday.”

“Yeah, well, he can relate,” Will cut in. “He’s crushed on someone who didn’t return it. He knows the feeling.”

“Sucks,” Kayla agreed. A nymph put a plate of waffles in front of her. “Thanks.”

The nymph nodded and walked off, her reddish hair swaying behind her. For some reason, Kayla was reminded of Julia. 

_Why was she thinking about that now?_


	6. Capturing Flags

The rest of the day was uneventful. Kayla practiced her archery on her lonesome for most of the day. She ate a light dinner in case she’d have to do a lot of running and met up with everyone for Capture the Flag right after dinner. Malcolm was leading a huddle, his normal glasses replaced by a set of Celestial bronze goggles. He had a map of the forest in his hands. “So,” he started. “We’re gonna be focusing on holding the far side of the creek.”

Kayla groaned internally. That meant they’d be farther into the forest. She didn’t like the forest in the first place, much less after dark. She saw Austin tense up next to her and took his hand, rubbing it in a comforting manner.

“I know it’s not exactly ideal for our Apollo kids, but Markowitz and Wakefield both insisted, and Wakefield is a stubborn motherfucker and Markowitz is sneaky enough to make my life hell in a thousand subtle ways if I don’t go with it, so…” Malcolm shrugged. 

“Never thought those two would agree on anything,” Will mused.

“Yeah. Anyway, we’ve got the far side of the river. This is good, because it means we get more, better concealed area.”

Austin raised his hand. “I maintain that we should park Clovis on it.”

Clovis made a grunt of protest. He swayed sleepily.

“No,” Malcolm said simply. “I’ve scouted out a tree with a good crook in it about twenty feet up. It’s next to a very good climbing tree, so we should be able to get there with ease. It’s an excellent spot for a sniper, so I figured Lake and Knowles would guard it. di Angelo, you’re on offensive with Nyssa and Harley. Solace, you do whatever. Chiara, Valentina, you two stay on defense and act as bait. Same with you, Clovis.” Malcolm looked around at the faces he commanded. “... And I think that’s everyone. I’ll be going back and forth between offense and defense to make sure everything’s kosher. I’ll give individual instructions once everything is in place. If you forget what you’re doing, find something to do, or find me and I’ll remind you.”

There were general nods. Malcolm pulled the flag from his back pocket. “Knowles, can I trust you with this?”

“Yes, you can,” Kayla insisted, plucking the flag from his hands. 

They dismissed. Malcolm led Kayla and the rest of the defense to the aforementioned tree. “Think you can climb this?”

“Sure can.” Kayla planted her foot in the crook of the tree, pulling herself up into the branches. The bark was rough on her callused hands, it scraped against her skin where it was left uncovered by armor. She shimmied up the full twenty feet, crawled slowly out on a sturdy branch and tucked the flag into the crook of a neighboring tree. “Got it!”

“Nice,” Malcolm praised. “Austin, get up there. I’m gonna go make sure offense has their shit together. Defense, you good?”

“Defense is good,” Chiara said.

Malcolm vanished into the forest. Austin climbed up to where Kayla was seated with her bow. “Ugh. I hate these woods.”

“I know,” Kayla replied, putting an arm around him. “I hate them, too.”

“I’m sorry,” Austin murmured. “I should have done something when… when you started ranting and raving. I wish… I wish I had grabbed you and yanked you in the other direction, not tried to talk you down. I’m… I’m so sorry.”

Kayla leaned in and lay her head on his shoulder. “Don’t worry about it. You didn’t know what was happening. By the time you figured it out it had taken you too.”

Austin took a breath. “Thanks.”

They fell into silence. Austin and Kayla took turns jumping at every noise. It took a while before they relaxed. It was actually kind of a nice night, cool but not cold, with a sweet-smelling breeze blowing. Austin was warm against Kayla. it put her at ease.

That shattered when she felt a knife on her throat.

“Checkmate,” purred Julia, right in Kayla’s ear.

Kayla whirled. Austin flipped something on his combat saxophone and blew into it. A blast of force knocked Julia back. She grabbed onto the first thing she could reach, that thing being Kayla’s bow. Kayla yanked on the bow. 

_ Snap.  _

The bow snapped cleanly in two at the handhold and Julia plummeted to the ground with the half she held in her hand. Julia yelped. Kayla shrieked. “My bow! You broke my bow!”

Julia groaned. She’d landed a little funny, Kayla could tell, but that wasn’t her concern. She turned to the flag only to see Alice’s fingers an inch away from it. She grabbed Alice’s belt. Alice shrieked, but grabbed the flag and jumped from the tree. She rolled and started running.

“Don’t let her get away!” Kayla yelled. She shinnied down the tree and bolted after Alice. Kayla was fast, but Alice was faster, and Apollo kids were generally poor in dense vegetation. It was only a moment before Alice had streaked to the river, then through the river to the other side, almost slamming into Nico di Angelo, who was carrying the red flag while being pursued by Lou Ellen and Cecil. Nico swore. Cecil gave Alice a high five. 

Chiron trotted through the crowd. “Alright, alright! We have a winner! Red team wins! Everyone go rest, get healing if you need to!”

Kayla swallowed hard. Julia would never let her hear the end of this. She’d be teased about this until the end of time, the little Apollo girl who nearly fell asleep on her brother’s shoulder and didn’t even notice she was being snuck up on until it was too late. Fuck, and she was already being teased for being too reliant on her brothers.

Will ran through the crowd. “Is anyone else injured?”

“Julia might be,” Alice cut in.

“Okay. Take me to where she is,” Will ordered, his voice commanding. He and Alice ran off.

Kayla silently made her way to the infirmary. It was less full than she had expected it to be, with only a few campers occupying scattered beds. She recognized Paolo Montes. Chiara was there, gently rubbing her arm where it was covered by a fresh white bandage. Nyssa sat holding Harley’s hand. Harley looked like he was trying not to cry. His ankle was twisted at a funny angle. “Chiron, do you and Will need help?”

He looked up from where he was setting Paolo’s broken leg. “Here, keep him still for me.”

Kayla did as she was told. 

“How was Capture the Flag for you?” Chiron asked.

“Julia broke my bow,” she lamented.

“Oh, dear,” Chiron commiserated. “Well, we can get you a new one.”

Kayla pouted. “And she was able to distract me so Alice could get the flag. She’s gonna tease me for it.”

“If she does, tell me and I’ll talk to her. Tomorrow, you can go to the weapons shed and pick out a new bow, okay? How does that sound?”

Kayla sighed. “I guess that sounds good.”

They finished up with Paolo. “You know what to do,” Chiron nodded. “Crutches, stay off the leg, take your nectar, don’t get it wet. You can clean yourself in the bathtub we have in here, okay?”

Paolo nodded. 

“Good.”

Just then, Will entered with Julia cradled in his arms. He lay her on one of the beds. Chiron trotted over, Kayla on his heels. “How is she?”

“Bruised hip, badly scraped knees. Took me some time to get the bleeding to stop. She won’t have much fun sitting for a while.” Will sounded out of breath.

_ Serves her right for breaking my bow,  _ Kayla thought. 

“Kayla, will you get me some nectar, please?” Will asked.

Kayla obliged. Will tilted the bottle of nectar to Julia’s lips and she drank. Kayla watched as her skinned knees healed, the wounds closing as the magic took hold. Julia stood up from the cot as soon as she was healed. “I’m gonna go.”

“You sure you don’t need any specific bruise cream?” Will asked. 

“I’m fine,” she said. “There’s something I need to do before I go to bed, anyway.”

“Okay. Just be careful,” Will insisted. “I’d hate for something to go wrong with you.”

“Whatever,” Julia grumbled, leaving the infirmary.

“She’s been grumpier than normal lately,” Chiron observed. “I don’t know why.”

“She could be lovesick,” Will suggested.

“For the last time, Will, she’s not gay for me.”

“You never kno-ow,” Will said in a singsong voice.

Kayla just shook her head and moved on to help Chiron with the rest of the patients. 


	7. It's Just Life

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a fair warning, Julia calls Nico some names behind his back here. Not terrible or severe ones, but still could be upsetting if Nico is particularly dear to you.

Kayla slept somewhat more soundly that night. 

Her nightmares behaved themselves for the most part. The only unpleasantry was when she swore that there was someone moving by her bed, but when she woke up in full, there was no one there. _Just a bad dream._

She woke up at the horn, which was unusual. Usually she lay awake for at least an hour or so before the horn blew. She sat up, reflexively reaching for her bow.

It was there.

 _What?_ She could have sworn that Julia had broken her bow in Capture the Flag the previous night. Yet now, there was a bow hanging there that looked nearly identical to her former one. It was the right size for her and everything.

“Guys?”

Austin and Will made grunts of agreement. 

“Did one of you replace my bow?”

Austin sat up. “No. Why?”

“There’s a bow on the hook I used to keep my other bow on before it broke.”

“Must have been Chiron,” Will grunted, rolling out of bed and stumbling into the bathroom. 

“Come on, man, it’s my turn for first shower,” Austin grumbled.

“If I don’t piss now I’ll fucking explode. Give me a minute.”

“Too much info!” Kayla huffed. She rolled out of bed. “I’m gonna go test this bow. I’ll shower after breakfast, okay?”

“Yeah, you do that,” Austin sighed. 

Kayla put a bra on under the tank top she slept in and left the cabin. It was a cool and windy morning. No one else had roused themselves yet. The archery range was quiet in the morning light. She half expected to see Alice there again, but the range was empty. 

She grabbed an arrow and nocked it, stretching back the bowstring. It drew smoothly, easily. When she let it go, the arrow flew fast and straight. Kayla laughed. If it was Chiron, then he had done a very good job. 

“Wow,” came a voice from behind her. “Your hair is a fucking rat’s nest.”

Kayla turned. Julia was standing behind her, leaning against the closed gate. Alice was there, a funny little smirk on her face. “Julia. Did you come to apologize for breaking my bow?”

Julia snorted. “You gonna apologize for having a shitty bow that broke under my weight?”

“A bow isn’t meant to be used as a fucking rappelling device,” Kayla retorted. “If you had grabbed the branch, you wouldn’t have fallen.”

Julia didn’t respond. Her eyes fell on Kayla’s new bow. “... You got a new one already, huh? Someone at camp must really fuckin’ like your ass.”

“Will said it was Chiron.”

“Yeah, well, Will’s dating the necro-hellgremlin, he doesn’t get an opinion,” huffed Julia. “Form your own opinion for once, Knowles. Who do _you_ think replaced your bow?”

“Well, neither Will or Austin replaced it, so I’m going with either Nico, Chiron or Lou Ellen. Maybe your brother, but I don’t know,” reasoned Kayla. “Also, Nico’s actually a good guy when you get to know him. Not a hellgremlin at all.”

“Speak for yourself; he freaks me out,” Julia dismissed.

Kayla had a sudden burst of insight. She studied Julia closely. “Anyway, are you just bullying me, or do you know who did it and are trying to run me around until I guess?”

Julia gave a huffy little laugh. She smirked. “Wow, took you long enough. Despite how much you annoy me, the sad little face you made when your bow broke really tugged at my heartstrings. So I took it upon myself to make a quick visit to the weapons shed after Capture the Flag last night. Wasn’t too hard to break into your cabin, you dumbshits don’t lock your windows and I’m pretty skinny, so…” Julia shrugged. “Don’t thank me all at once.”

Kayla was too shocked to close her mouth. “... But… wait, that makes no _sense._ You… what? Okay.” Kayla swallowed. “I won’t look a gift horse in the mouth.”

“Didn’t think you would,” Julia muttered. “Anyway, Knowles, I’ll seeya later.” She turned around and ran off, Alice yelling at her all the way.

Kayla’s head was spinning. She sat down heavily against the gate. _Really? Julia? Maybe she does have a soul, after all. But why would she start being nice to me now? Was Will right when he said she was into you?_

_Nah. She’s probably just experiencing a crisis of conscience. Don’t overthink it. If you start thinking she’s in love with you, you’ll start falling in love with her, and the last thing you need now is another doomed crush. It’s only been two damn days since Lou Ellen. You don’t need more anguish._

The breakfast horn blew. Kayla took a few deep breaths and made her way to the dining pavilion. She fetched her breakfast--eggs and bacon--and made her way to where Will and Austin were sitting with Nico, Cecil and Lou Ellen on the edge of the pavilion. Lou gave her a sorrowful look. 

“Hey, guys.” Kayla flopped down between Austin and Cecil.

“Kay,” Austin greeted. 

“Hey, um… Kayla,” Lou Ellen started. “I just… I wanted to apologize again.”

“Not your fault,” Kayla sighed. “It wasn’t anybody’s fault. It was just… life, I guess.” A bitter laugh escaped her throat. 

“You’re doing really well with this,” Nico commented. There were general murmurs of agreement.

Kayla swallowed. “... Thanks, guys.”

“I’d offer you a hug, but…” Lou Ellen trailed off.

“Yeah, no, that wouldn’t help,” Kayla laughed. “I’d take it normally, but… not now.”

There was a pause. Cecil raised his head. “Wait, Kay, I thought your bow was broke.”

“Dude, Julia got me a new one.”

Will started. “Wait, _Julia?_ But she picks on you all the time!”

Austin wiggled his fork. “Maybe she’s had a change of heart. Realized that there’s no reason people should pick on little Kay.”

Cecil sighed. “Julia’s not a bad person. She’s just… she has issues. Lots of them. And she’s had it kind of rough. She can be a jerk, sure, but I think she hates herself most of all.”

Kayla was quiet for a few moments. “... I mean, I’m pretty forgiving, I’d be willing to make friends if she wanted to make friends. I just don’t want her to pick on me anymore. I’d need the safety of her not doing that before I could get emotionally involved with her at all.”

“Think she’s a lesbo?” asked Lou Ellen through a mouthful of toast. 

“Why is everyone saying that?” Kayla lamented. “If everyone keeps trying to say that, I’ll actually start believing it.”

“You could call her over and ask her,” Lou Ellen suggested. 

“Okay, one,” Cecil started, “she probably wouldn’t be comfortable confessing everything in front of us anyway, and two, she… ah… she doesn’t really like… she’s not comfortable around…”

“It’s me, isn’t it?” Nico blurted. He shrunk in on himself. “Because if it is, I can go--”

“You’re not going anywhere,” Cecil said firmly. “We can all find other times to talk to Julia. You stay.”

Nico swallowed. “... Uh. Thanks,” he whispered.

Cecil ruffled Nico’s hair. “Yeah, man, the group wouldn’t be complete without you.”

Nico opened his mouth a few times before shaking his head. Will kissed his temple. When he finally pulled away, Nico’s face was the shade of a ripe pomegranate. 

“You all right?” Will asked. 

Nico made a noise like air escaping a teakettle.

“I’m taking that as a yes,” Will responded cheerily. “Anyway, yeah, I agree with Cecil. Don’t try and make her confess everything in front of a crowd. Besides, she might not be lesbian at all, and then we all look like morons. Best to let it just play out and see what happens.”

Kayla nodded. _“Thank_ you! Finally, you’re admitting that you just _miiiiiiiight_ be wrong about her being gay! Gods, I’m so fucking tired of you all.”

“You can go if you want,” Lou Ellen suggested.

“I’m especially done with your bitch ass,” Kayla grumbled.

“Damn, you got over me right quick,” Lou Ellen laughed.

Kayla’s heart twisted. “Um… I… uh…”

“Too soon?” asked Lou Ellen.

Kayla nodded.

Lou Ellen patted her shoulder. “I’m sorry.”

Nico put his hand out again from across the circle. Kayla moved to lean on his shoulder. He stiffened, but then grasped her shoulder with a remarkably gentle hand. Will took her other hand and squeezed it gently, rubbing her knuckles with a tender thumb. Nico smelled nice, his shirt had been freshly washed. 

After a moment, Will kissed her head and pushed her plate of food at her. “You should eat.”

Kayla pushed down a few bites of food. “Thanks. I mean it. Especially you, Nico, you’ve done way too much.”

Nico gave her a watery smile. _And yet I feel like I haven’t done enough._ “It’s my pleasure.”

They ate in silence for a moment. Suddenly, a great cry rang out from somewhere near the forest. Nico rose to his feet. “And there’s my cue. I’ll be off.”

“You’re an idiot if you think I’m letting you go alone,” Will replied. “Come on. We’re all going with you.”

Nico blushed, but waited a moment while the other five stood up and marshaled their weapons. Austin flipped a few switches on his saxophone before chuckling to himself. Before anyone could ask further of him, another ruckus rose in the distance, and Nico bolted, the others on his heels. 


	8. Ants. Ants? ANTS!

When they got there, Nyssa and Harley were already pointing flamethrowers at a trio of hissing myrmekes. Kayla started. Apollo had told her of those things, and she’d heard them scuttling in the forest at night, but she hadn’t seen one in several years, since before Manhattan, she thought. They tended to keep a distance from large groups of campers, and Kayla didn’t travel through the forest alone. Not after Nero. 

She sighed and nocked an arrow in her new bow, focusing on the big compound eyes of the things. Eyes had to be weak spots. Eyes were always weak spots. Always. She fired the first arrow and it lodged neatly in the eye of the leading beast. The myrmeke reeled.

Nyssa and Harley took that chance to fire their flamethrowers at the two on the side, sending them scattering. One turned tail and bolted into the forest. The other ran straight for Kayla. Kayla drew another arrow, but the hard chitinous leg of the myrmeke smacked the arrow from the bow before she could shoot. She squealed loudly as a few drops of the myrmeke’s foul acid dripped on her neck. The pain was somewhere between a burn and a tickle. She gulped. There was no way she could shoot from this close and she knew it. She jabbed at the thing’s eyes with her bare fingers. It hissed and bit down hard on her neck. Something hot dripped down her neck. Her head spun. She couldn’t breathe. The ferocious jaws were crushing her windpipe.

She lay her head back.  _ Well, guess I’ll get a family reunion soon. _

The world went black, and she thought no more.

When she came to, the world was warm, and sun was streaming over her cheek and shoulder. Her neck stung when she tried to move her head. She moved her hands. A light, slightly coarse knitted blanket was draped over her. When she touched her neck, she found the white gauze of a bandage. 

A soft hand trailed over her cheek. She forced her heavy eyelids open. Will and Austin were hovering over her. Will’s hand moved from her cheek to her shoulder. Austin grabbed her hand. “You’re awake!”

“.. Whu… hapn’ed?” Kayla’s throat was dry and sticky.

“They bit your neck. Nearly pierced your jugular. Oh, gods, Kay, you almost…” Will’s voice broke, “... you could have died.”

Kayla sat up, slowly, her stitches burning. “... ‘M not dead. Not yet.”

And we’re so grateful for that,” Austin broke in, wrapping his arms around her. 

Kayla leaned into the touch, closing her eyes. Austin’s arms were warm, it felt safe and good. “How long have I been out?”

“Just a few hours,” Will soothed, taking her hand. “They didn’t get to do much damage before Austin blasted them off. You’ve got some stitches in your neck, but with some ambrosia and nectar you should be fine in a few days. The only concern is if you get hurt again in the area it could become very serious very quickly, so...”

“You want me to stay here, don’t you?” Kayla asked.

“If you’d be so kind,” Will responded. “Only for a day or so, not for very long at all. There’s a bathtub in here, so you can bathe without getting the stitches too wet, if you’d like, and I’ve been able to get you a private room.”

Kayla squeezed her eyes shut. “You’re too kind, do you know that?”

Will chuckled. “Hardly. Now, Austin, if you’ll keep an eye on her, I’m gonna go get her some water, and let Cecil and Nico and Lou Ellen know you’re up. They’ve been asking about you.”

Kayla smiled. “... Tell them I love them.”

“Will do,” he responded. 

Kayla lay heavily in Austin’s arms for a few moments. He stroked her hair with a tender hand. It was making her sleepy again. 

“... You know, I was really scared,” Austin murmured.

Kayla shifted. “... You were?”

“Yeah,” he responded, his voice soft and wavering. “... I… I know the loss of one sibling seems inconsequential compared to all you’ve lost, but if you died, I’d actually be… I think it would take me years to recover, if I ever recovered at all.”

Kayla moved to be closer to his warmth. “... And you seriously think I recovered from Michael? Or from Lee? Or from any of the others?”

“Well… you’re not just a sad ball of grief all the time, so you’ve clearly recovered to some extent,” Austin tried. “You’re very strong besides, so…”

Kayla smiled a little, nuzzling Austin’s collar. He smelled nice. “... Thanks.”

Austin kissed her head. “Of course.”

Will returned with a water bottle. “Here, Kay, you should drink something. It’ll be good for you.”

Kayla stirred from where she was lying against Austin. She took the bottle from Will and drank deeply of the sating water. She closed her eyes. She felt heavy and tired, and Austin’s arms were warm and cozy. “... Thanks,” she mumbled.

Will leaned in and kissed her cheek. “No problem.” He stretched. “As much as I’d love to stay and snuggle you two, I need to go check the others in the infirmary. Harley says his foot is still bothering him, and Alice took an injury in the myrmeke fight as well. It got her wrist, and the acid burned her pretty good. She’ll have some nasty scars.”

Kayla yawned. “Give her my condolences, will you?” 

“Will do,” Will replied. “I’ll check on you soon, okay?”

Kayla nodded. She lay her head back against Austin and Austin shifted to make her comfortable. She was tired, so tired, from fighting and hurting and healing. Her eyelids still were heavy. Austin drew a blanket around her and light sleep overtook her once again as she lay in Austin’s arms. 


	9. Tell Her Or I Will

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: there's some mentioned homophobia in this, but it isn't descriptive.

It was a while later when she awoke, a sour taste in her mouth, her head spinning. She raised her head off of Austin’s shoulder--how long she’d been there, she didn’t know--and looked up on his face, groaning as the stitches in her neck were agitated. His eyes were closed, and he looked soft and fully peaceful. His lips were parted slightly. She kissed his cheek. 

She still heard some speaking and noise from the infirmary, so it couldn’t be that late. Probably wasn’t even dinnertime yet. She rolled carefully onto the edge of the bed, her eyes suddenly falling on a small object on the bedside table. It was a dagger. 

She picked it up. A small note was attached to it, the handwriting looking semi-crazed and slanting.  _ Since you can’t seem to stop getting hurt.  _

She sat on the edge of the bed for a long while.  _ Austin’s soundly asleep, and he hasn’t left, and if he had a present for me he’d just give it to me. Will and Chiron both know I’m not a knife fighter. I’ve never successfully hurt something with a knife in my life. I don’t have many other friends, at least none I’m close to.  _

_ Could it be Julia again? There’s a difference between replacing something you broke and taking actual pains to keep someone safe, I know that, but… I don’t know. I’m scared to ask. Maybe Alice would know? But even then, would Alice tell me the truth? _

_ She’s allegedly right in the main infirmary. I could go ask her right now.  _

Kayla rose shakily off the bed, her stitches throbbing as her heartbeat rose. She stumbled from the room, her eyes locking suddenly with…

“Julia?”

“What?” Julia focused her with a searching look. She was sitting next to where Alice was sitting in bed, also focusing on Kayla. The two of them were the only other people in the infirmary.

“Can I talk to Alice alone, please?” Kayla asked.

“Whatever you can say to me, you can say to both of us,” Alice cut in. “I promise I won’t let Julia bully you too much.”

Julia gulped, but said nothing.

Kayla swallowed back the butterflies in her stomach and held up the dagger. “... Anyway… This was by my bed when I woke up.”

Julia looked wearily at her. “And why are you telling me this?”

Kayla shifted her feet. “I was wondering if… it was you. Julia. Who gave it to me. Because you gave me the bow. That’s what I was gonna ask Alice about.”

Julia shifted. Sweat broke across her brow. “No, I…”

“She did,” Alice cut in. “She gave you the dagger.”

Kayla searched both of their faces. Julia’s face was almost as red as her hair. Alice was grinning. “... Why are you trying to be nice to me now?” Kayla asked. “You’ve been nothing but mean to me the entire time you’ve been at camp.”

Julia looked towards the door. “... I… well… perhaps I feel bad for my prior transgressions. Maybe I’ve come to the belief that you don’t deserve the verbal abuse I’ve been doling out to you over the past little while.”

“Dude, just yesterday you had a knife to my neck!”

“That was in Capture the Flag!” Julia shot back. “Everyone tries to hurt each other in Capture the Flag! Besides, it’s not like I actually  _ stabbed  _ you!”

Kayla sighed. “Still, it’s a big jump in two days from saying you don’t want me anywhere near you to giving me a present that would help keep me safe. Seriously, why do you allegedly want me around so badly now? Wouldn’t it be better for you to just let me die? Or do you just want to keep me around so you can have a little shit-pig to beat up whenever you get the urge?” 

Julia stared at the ground for a very long time. 

“Huh? Answer me!” Kayla’s stitches were aching badly with the effort of yelling at Julia.

“Oh, my gods! I can’t stand this anymore!” Alice burst out. “Dammit, Jules, tell her or I will!”

Julia made a terrible gurgling noise in the back of her throat.

“Tell me what?” Kayla asked. “I’m curious.”  _ Whatever this is, when I find it out, I’ll have a lot of power over Julia. Power to get her to stop bullying me. _

“She’s like super into you!”

There was a moment of silence. Then, pandemonium. Julia shot up. “You… fucking…  _ traitor,”  _ she hissed, glaring daggers at Alice. “You traitor, you bastard!” Her voice broke. “And to think I thought I could  _ trust  _ you!”

“Julia, it’s… it’s okay,” Kayla reassured.

Julia looked over at Kayla, and for a second, there was a look on Julia’s face that Kayla had never seen before. Her eyes were red and wet, her lip was trembling. She looked like a wretched animal, humiliated and cast out to die. She didn’t let Kayla look at her for very long before she was turning and running out of the infirmary, fast as Hermes himself. 

Kayla took a deep breath. “... What… just happened?”

Alice cast herself down into her bed, not bothering to answer Kayla’s half-rhetorical question.

Kayla took a deep breath.  _ Okay. Deal with the crying person in front of you before you go hunt down a wounded animal for answers.  _ She sat down in the chair that Julia had previously occupied. Alice had pulled the blankets up around her face. Kayla put a hand on her back. “Hey, Alice, I’m so sorry. I didn’t… I didn’t know that… I didn’t know that the truth was what it was. I didn’t know she’d react like that.”

Alice sniffled. She wiped her nose on a tissue from a nearby box. “... You’re too nice, Kay. No, I… I should have known. She has… I’m sure either I or Cecil told you she has some issues.”

Kayla was quiet. “Who was her mother?”

Alice shuddered. “Let’s not go into that right now.”

“Does anyone know she’s into women besides the three of us?”

“Well… her mother.” 

“And said mother… didn’t take it well?”

Alice gave a tiny nod. 

Kayla was quiet for a few moments. Alice was sniffling, trying not to cry. She kept balling new tissues into her increasingly large wad of the things and hiccuping into them. Kayla put her arms slowly around her, and Alice lay against her shoulder. Kayla pet her hair. “Your hair is really nice.”

Alice sniffled. “Is it?”

“Yeah. It’s really sleek.” And it was. It was sleek and dark and looked decently combed even though she’d been lying in a bed for a little while. Kayla thought of her own “rat’s nest” bed hair and felt an immense jealousy. 

Alice patted her hair. “Thanks.”

Kayla rubbed her shoulder. There was a pause. “... Where do you think Julia went?”

Alice swallowed. “Probably either the Hermes cabin or the climbing wall. Maybe the swordfighting range, but I don’t know. Either that or she’s looting the camp store.”

“Oh, gods. Of course. Anyway… should we go find her? Just to make sure she’s okay? She was in a hell of a state when she left,” Kayla worried. 

Alice bit her lip. “... I’m worried for her, too. Come with me and we’ll find her.”

“Aren’t we supposed to be…?”

“Eh. That’s bull. I can sneak you out good. And you know Will loves you too much to get mad at you,” Alice shrugged. 

Kayla sighed. “... You’re right. Just… look, if gods forbid something happens, and I go down, you run right back here and get Will. If Will isn’t here, get Chiron.  _ Please.” _

Alice nodded solemnly. “Of course.”

“Thanks. You’re a good person.” Kayla rose shakily from the chair. “Can you walk?”

“Yeah, but I can’t use my right arm at all. Too painful.”

Kayla gave a low chuckle. “Hopefully you won’t need to use it.” She took Alice’s good hand in her own and pulled her up. “Let’s go talk to Julia.”


	10. Do It All Over Again

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Julia, Alice and Kayla have a talk. It goes... interestingly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Self harm warning. I don't condone self harm at all. Don't hurt yourself just because "oh, Weezl's writing about it, so it must be cool!" It's not. All it does is freak people out.

They literally tripped over her. 

She was curled up behind the Hermes cabin, rocking back and forth, a sad little ball of fiery red and bright orange, her braids limp on her cheeks. Kayla saw her old tormenter like this and had to force herself not to kneel down and comfort her. 

“Julia?” Alice asked softly.

“Go away,” Julia sniffled. “I don’t want you here.”

“But… I’m your sister, and I was your best friend for years before that…” Alice’s voice was barely audible.

“You made Kayla hate me,” Julia sniffled. “She was ready to forgive me, I think.”

“I don’t hate you,” Kayla blurted. “Julia, you verbally abused me for… I don’t even know how long. If I hate you, it’s your own damn fault, not Alice’s. Alice is sweet. Alice doesn’t bully me. I’d like to be Alice’s friend.”

Julia took a shaky breath. “... I’m… I’m sorry.”

There was a long pause. Finally, Kayla broke the silence. “... Is it true?”

“Is… is what true?”

“That you’re in love with me.”

Julia stared at the pebbles on the ground for a long time. “... I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. I don’t have any… oh, gods, Kay, I was really…”

Kayla sat down next to her. “... Were you scared?”

“Terrified,” Julia whispered.

“Is that why you bullied me? Because it was easier than admitting that you had feelings for me?” 

Julia nodded. 

Kayla saw tears falling on her knees. She felt an immense pity take over her, and despite all of Julia’s prior abuse, she felt a sudden urge to hold her. “... Look, Julia, while what you did isn’t  _ okay,  _ per se, I understand why you did it, and I forgive you. I don’t hold on to negative feelings easily. If you start being nice to me, we’ll be good in no time.”

Julia gulped on her tears. “But you still hate me, right? Please, tell me you hate me! It’ll hurt less,  _ please!”  _

Kayla sucked in air.  _ Please, give me Will’s healing powers.  _ She exhaled the breath. “Julia… I don’t hate you. It’s too hard to hate you when you’re crying like this. I can’t… I just can’t.” She extended her legs out in front of her. “Here, take a deep breath. It’ll help.”

Julia took a shaky breath, but it was broken up by painful gasps.

Kayla looked her over. Her hands were shaking badly. “Here, hold on to my hands. It’ll steady you.”

Julia took her hands. 

Kayla squeezed her hands, frail and shaky. “Okay. Deep breaths. You’re okay. I know it doesn’t feel like it right now, but it’s actually gonna be okay. We’ve been through so much worse.”

Julia took a few deep breaths. Finally, she leaned against the wall, still not letting go of Kayla’s hands, a warm, reassuring weight in her own. “... I love you,” she mumbled. “You’re gorgeous, and it’s fucking stupid, because…” Julia trailed off. 

“It’s gonna take more than a few sweet words to make up for all the awful ones you’ve given me before,” Kayla nagged. 

Julia sniffled, and a few more tears dripped down her cheeks. “... I’m so sorry… I was scared… so fucking scared…”

Kayla squeezed her hands. “I know. I know. You’re scared. But you’re safe here, I think, and you’ve got Alice, and Cecil, and, if this niceness continues, you’ll have me.”

A flicker of hope passed through Julia’s reddened eyes, which Kayla suddenly noticed were a particularly lovely shade of blue-green. Julia half-smiled at her, a tricky little thing. “... Thanks, Kayla.”

Kayla studied her. “... No problem, Julia.” 

Kayla held her hands for a few moments more. Her hands stilled slowly as Kayla held them, her eyelids slowly slipping closed. Kayla looked down at Julia’s hands, still clasped in her own. She had long, slim fingers with nails bitten short. Julia was wearing a camp sweater that nearly covered her palms, but as Kayla rubbed softly over her hands, her sweater slipped up. A red, scabby scratch marred the pale peach of her wrist. Kayla’s blood ran cold. She knew what that was. 

She and Julia met eyes, and Julia looked terrified again. Kayla didn’t say anything, just put Julia’s hands down gently and extended her arms. “Hug?”

Julia grabbed hold of her, a choked sob forcing out of her throat. Kayla pulled her into a comfortable embrace.  _ No wonder Cecil said Julia had problems.  _ “Hey, hey, it’s okay, I’ve got you.”

“Don’t fuckin’ patronize me, Knowles,” Julia hiccuped.

“I’m not. I’m trying to make you feel better,” Kayla sighed.

“You’re so fuckin’  _ stupid,  _ Knowles… your cute fuckin’ face… your little round nose… such a cute nose… and your bright blue eyes… and your beautiful heart… I hate you… I hate you…” Julia balled her fists tightly in Kayla’s jacket. 

“You don’t hate me,” Kayla said softly. “It sounds like you like me a lot, actually.”

Julia sniffled. “Shut up.”

Kayla shut up. There was a long pause. Finally, Julia raised her head from Kayla’s shoulder and pulled away, slumping against the wall. “I guess you’re gonna tell everyone now? So that everyone can make fun of me and bully me? Like I always did to you?”

Kayla took a deep breath. “No. I’m not gonna tell anyone. I’m not… no.”

“Oh, right, because you’re just  _ such  _ a good person.” A few more tears leaked out of Julia’s eyes. “See, this is why I’m fucking jealous of you! You’re just fine! You’ve got brothers who love the shit out of you, you’ve got a stable, perfect life, you’ve got plans, you’ve got skills, everyone loves you, you’re kind and good, fuck!” She hit the side of the cabin, hard. “I hate you!”

“You’ve got a splinter in your knuckles,” Kayla said in her gentlest voice. 

“Fuck off,” Julia sniffled, pulling a Swiss Army knife from her waistband. She flicked a pair of pliers out of it and pulled out the splinter. The area was slightly red and puffy. “My point still stands. You’re fucking perfect.”

Kayla sighed, clenching her jaw. “I’m not perfect, Julia. I have flaws, just like everyone else. And you have skills, too. You’ve got a good brain in your head. You’re very clever. You can put that towards all kinds of things.”

Julia’s lip twitched a little, but a full smile never appeared. “What the hell are your flaws, then? You think you have them, then tell me what the fuck they are!”

Kayla huffed. “You’ll just bully me.”

“Oh, so you admit you don’t think you’ve got any flaws. Arrogant little Apollo prick.”

Kayla yanked up the sleeves of her jacket and stuck her scarred arms in Julia’s face. She looked away, her eyes stinging. 

Julia was silent for a very long time. 

“Are you happy now?” Kayla’s voice crescendoed to a shout. “Are you fucking happy now? See? I have flaws! We have the same fucking flaw! We’re not different, you and I! I’m not any better than you! I’m not any better than anybody!” Kayla’s voice broke and tears slipped down her cheeks. 

“Put your coat back on,” Julia whispered. “Please.”

Kayla did as she was told. She crossed her arms over her stomach. 

Julia sighed. “Why the fuck would you…?”

“You do realize that the Apollo cabin suffered the heaviest losses of any cabin in both the Labyrinth, Manhattan and the battle with Gaia, right?”

“You do realize it’s the Hermes cabin’s fault that the Labyrinth and Manhattan happened in the first place, right?” Julia returned. “You guys get to grieve honestly. All we get is shame and guilt.”

Kayla was quiet. “... Who’s giving you shame for being related to…? It wasn’t any of your faults. Especially not yours and Alice’s. You two weren’t even there for the Labyrinth or Manhattan.”

Julia sighed. “No one says anything outright. Everyone is too nice for that. But you can hear the judgement, the pity in their voices when they talk to you about it.”

“Well… look, his betrayal was his own damn fault, not anyone else’s. A criminal’s crimes aren’t the faults of their families.”

Julia hugged herself. “... Thanks.” She was quiet for a long time. “... And I’m sorry. About your brothers and sisters.”

Kayla gave her a soft smile. “Thanks.”

“Don’t look at me like that,” Julia grumbled. 

There was a long pause. “Do you want to come back to the infirmary with us?” Kayla offered. “We don’t have to talk about anything serious if you don’t want to. We can leave the deep conversations for later.”

Julia sniffled. “... Yeah, I’d like that.”

Kayla and Alice led Julia to the infirmary. Alice lay down on the bed, pulling the blanket over her head. Julia flopped down on the chair beside Alice’s bed. 

Kayla sighed. “You feeling any better?” 

Julia stared at the floor, then at Kayla, then at the floor again. Finally, she nodded. 

Kayla smiled. “Good. I’m gonna go lie down, because my stitches feel like someone poured lava in them. I guess I’ll see you two later?”

“Seeya,” Alice said under the blankets.

“... See you later, Kayla,” Julia mumbled.

When she got back to the private room, Austin stirred and woke. “Mmh. How long was I out?”

Kayla sat down on the edge of the bed and tucked one of his cornrows back into place. “Dunno. Couple of hours. I think it’s around dinnertime.”

Austin stretched. “Good. I’m starved.”

Kayla looked at him with wide, innocent eyes. “Will you bring me dinner?”

Austin sat up. “Sure. Yeah, we can eat together if you want.”

“You don’t want to…?”

“Honestly, the only reason I hang out with Will’s friends is because you hang out with Will’s friends. I’m not close with them,” Austin sighed. 

Kayla cocked her head. “But you have other friends, right?”

Austin shrugged. “Music is the only friend I need. And you’re my friend, so…”

Kayla pinched him. “You’re a good guy. You should get your head out of your music and make some friends.”

Austin stuck out his tongue. “Why don’t you get your head out of your archery and make some friends yourself?”

“I have friends!” Kayla defended.

“Name one. One who’s not one of Will’s friends who hangs out with you out of pity.”

“Alice Miyazawa,” Kayla blurted. “She’s been nice to me.”

Austin pouted. “You don’t even hang out!”

“Yeah, well, she and I could be friends! She’s nice,” Kayla defended. 

Austin held up his hands. “Okay, okay.” The dinner horn rang and he stretched. “I’m gonna go get you some food. And… I guess some for Alice as well.”

“Julia too.”

Austin gave her a strange look, but he nodded. “... All right. I’ll get four meals. You, Julia, Alice and I. I’ll see you in a moment, Kay.”

Kayla smiled and snuggled under the blanket. “Thanks, Austin.”

Austin gave a small laugh. “No problem, dude.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a warning, I don't really know what I'm going to do past this point. I have a few ideas, but I don't know.  
> Also, the bulk of the angst is over. It's gonna get fluffier from here, dw.


	11. You Know You Brought This On Yourself, Right?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the ten-day gap between updates. I have no idea why this chapter took me so long to write lol

Kayla slept fitfully that night. 

She thought a lot about Julia. About how she said she was scared. About how Alice said that Julia’s mom wasn’t okay with her. About how easily Julia, who had made fun of her for so long, had crawled into her arms when she’d offered it. She wondered how long it had been since someone had cuddled Julia. It made her heart sore. 

She woke up to Will flinging open the curtains. “Mornin’, funshine! How’d you sleep?”

“What the fuck is wrong with you?” Kayla lifted her head off the pillow, rubbing her eyes.

“Weird, Nico said the exact same thing. Minus the profanity,” Will laughed. He sat down on the side of her bed. “I didn’t get to change your bandage last night. Sit up so I can do it now.” 

“No, fuck off,” Kayla groaned, pulling the pillow over her head. 

“Kayla,” Will said sternly.

Kayla threw the pillow at Will. 

Will caught it and set it lovingly next to her head. He kissed her cheek. “Here, I’ll help you sit up. It won’t take me long to get the bandages changed.” Will took Kayla under the arms and pulled her up, leaning her against the wall. He gently pulled the bandage off. “Kayla.”

“What?”

“These are swollen,” Will nagged. “You haven’t been resting, have you?”

“I just got out of bed to have a conversation with Julia and Alice,” Kayla said meekly. “I wasn’t out very long.”

Will huffed. “Still, these stitches are in a very delicate area. You _need_ to be careful. I couldn’t bear to see you hurt or killed because of your recklessness.” He took a deep breath. “Here, drink some nectar. I think that’ll help. If it does enough, I’ll take out the stitches later today.” He handed her a flask of nectar. 

Kayla drank. It made her stitches feel a lot better. 

“Good. I can see it getting better already.”

“How bad is it?” Kayla asked. “Like, really?”

Will bit his lip. “It’s mostly skin trauma, thank the gods. Mostly bruising, some second-degree burns--barely noticeable now--and some muscle piercing on the sides from the tip of the thing’s jaws, but that’s been healed by now. You’ll be fine. A little neck scarring, but no big deal. Austin saved your ass, thank the gods. Someone up there loves you.”

“Wait, was that the pain on the front of my neck?”

“Yup.” Will popped the P. “The stitches are on the side of your neck, and there are only two of them on each side. Still, you shouldn’t have gone gallivanting around with the Hermes girls. The stitches aren’t more than an inch from your jugular artery. Have you seen one of those damn things squirt? It’s gruesome.”

Kayla held up her hand. “That’s enough, Will. You and Austin saved my ass and that’s all that matters.”

Will exhaled. “I guess so.” He gently rebandaged her neck. “More nectar at all meals and I’ll take off the bandages and stitches tonight. You can’t even begin to understand how happy I am for nectar and ambrosia.”

“Truly,” Kayla agreed. “It’s saved us all a million times. Anyway, can I leave the infirmary today?”

Will sighed. “Fine. But nothing on the canoe lake. Lake water isn’t good for bandages, stitches, or wounds. Also, no climbing wall, fighting if you can avoid it, swimming, gymnastics, or wrestling. Just take it easy, _please.”_

“What about archery?”

Will bit his lip. “I don’t like it, but fine. Please, _please_ be careful.”

“Fiiiine,” Kayla drawled. “You suck, you know that?”

Will snorted. “Oh, right, I’m a regular dictator.” He huffed. “I’m gonna go get you some food. You still need to eat. I’ll be back in a minute.”

Kayla nodded. “Alright. I’ll see you in a moment.”

Will kissed her cheek, stood up, and left. A moment later, Kayla trailed him out to the main infirmary. Alice was there. Julia wasn’t. “Alice,” Kayla acknowledged.   
“Kayla,” Alice returned. “You sleep okay?”

Kayla shrugged. “Meh. Could have been better. I…” Kayla sighed. “I feel really bad for Julia.”

Alice sighed. “I think a lot of us do. But look, Kay, it’s not your problem. You don’t need to feel sad just because Julia has problems.”

Kayla was quiet. “... It’s hard to put it out of my mind is all.”

“I know.” Alice paused. “How’s the neck?”

“Pretty good. Will’s gonna take the stitches out tonight. Against all odds, it didn’t pierce anything serious,” Kayla laughed.

Alice grinned. “That’s good.”

“How’s the wrist?” 

“Nearly healed,” Alice replied. “It’ll be fine by tomorrow with nectar, Will says.”

“Nice!” Kayla said cheerfully. 

“Yeah,” Alice shrugged. 

There was a pause. “So… after breakfast, I’m gonna go back to the Apollo cabin for some clean clothes so I can catch a shower. You wanna come with?”

“Wait, to get your clothes or to shower with you?”

Kayla reeled in horror. “No! No, to get my clothes,” she laughed.

Alice burst into giggles. “Okay, yeah, that’s good. Yeah, I don’t want to fuck you. But you don’t have a twin brother by any chance, do you?”

Kayla snorted. “If I do, they’re mortal and living in Canada with… my mortal father. Though with a Hermes kid’s Internet skills you could probably find him easy.”

Alice shrugged. “No. I don’t care enough.”

“Probably for the better,” Kayla laughed.

Alice was quiet for a moment. Kayla joined her in silence. Kayla’s mind drifted back to Julia. _She’s earned her bitterness, but is it right? I’m sure there’s a kind person underneath all that self-protective bitchery. Poor thing, having to be that bitter so young._

“... I’m still thinking about Julia,” Kayla mumbled. 

“She actually lived with my mother and I for a while,” Alice admitted. “She didn’t have any family in the area, so my mom took her in because we were friends, and that’s what you do for your friends. Also, my mom thought she could… better her, I guess. She’s always been a hellion, but she used to be worse. My mom helped calm her a lot.”

“That was really nice of your mom,” Kayla grinned.

“Yeah, my mom was a good person,” Alice sighed. 

Kayla paused. “... Was?”

Alice swore under her breath. “... Yeah.”

“If you don’t mind me asking, how…?”

“Car crash. Cyclops ran her off the road.”

“Oh.” Kayla didn’t quite know what to say. “Thanks for telling me.”

“Yeah. Anyway, don’t… don’t worry too much about Julia. Julia’s been through some shit, but it’s not more than some others, and she and her mom aren't close anyway. Apparently there were some issues beforehand, I don’t know. Julia doesn’t talk about anything ever.” Alice shook her head. “She’s my sister and it took me four years of knowing her to know that she doesn’t eat eggs.”

“Allergies?”

Alice snorted. “Nope. She just hates them.”

“That’s weird.” Kayla paused. “Like a cute weird, though.”

Will returned at that moment. He set down plates of food in front of Alice and Kayla. “You two okay?”

Alice nodded. “Yeah, we’re fine. You okay?”

Will grinned and ran his fingers through his hair. “Yeah, I’m fine.” He moved briskly away from the two girls, opening up the closet and scanning the inside. “Ugh. Someone should clean this.”

Kayla raised an eyebrow. “And by ‘someone’ I’m assuming you mean yourself?” 

Will sighed. “Yeah. I do mean me. I need to clean this place. It’s full of junk.” He picked up an empty milk jug and tilted it back and forth. “This was our nectar store back around the time of the battle with Gaia.”

“You mean ‘part of our’?” Kayla asked through a mouthful of toast.

Will sighed. “By the time the Roman siege was done, this bottle was all that was left of our nectar store. I never told anybody. I didn’t want to stir panic.” He looked at it for another moment or so, shuddered and tossed it aside. “Ugh. Bad memories. Glad the Romans shared theirs so willingly once peace was made.”

Kayla was silent for a moment. “... Damn. Nico came just in time.”

Will grinned. “He sure did. He’s a hero among the best of ‘em. I just wish he’d believe me when I told him so. He’s got way more humility than he deserves.” He paused. “Speaking of Nico, I’m gonna get my own breakfast and find him. See you guys later.”

“See you, Will.”

  
  


Kayla pushed open the door of the Apollo cabin, breathing in the familiar scent of her home, sage and linen. Alice tiptoed in behind her, looking around. “... Wow. For such a nice outside, I kind of expected…”

“You expected more, didn’t you? Yeah,” Kayla laughed. “Everyone does. It’s not actually fancy.”

“It’s nearly identical to the Hermes cabin,” Alice mused. “Just with more plants. And less crowded.”

Kayla shrugged. “Well, it’s home.” She looked up at her bunk. One of her bedsheets was half off of her bunk. _Weird._ She wondered if Will or Austin had decided to lie in her bunk at some point while she was in the infirmary. She sighed. “I’m gonna go put that sheet back on the bed. It shouldn’t be hanging like that.” 

Alice nodded. Kayla climbed up the ladder to her bed. Her eyes immediately fell on a long, flattish box on her pillow. She picked it up and opened it. There was a note inside. 

_Kaykay,_

_Since yu keep hurting urself lol_

_and also for being an unfairly nice and beautiful person_

_don’t use these all at once_

_Seeya bitch_

_Juuuuules_

Kayla smiled. “Alice, you won’t believe this.”

“You got Julia’s present, didn’t you?”

“I did.” Kayla looked back into the box. It was a set of probably thirty arrows, They had small engravings on the wooden shafts. She recognized it as being a level of enchantment--some flaming arrows, a few that would turn whatever they were embedded in to stone, a few that would instantly kill certain enemies, a few mystery ones, and a few that she (somewhat painfully) recognized as sonic arrows, similar to the ones Michael had used during Manhattan. She swallowed, forcing back the sorrow that instantly came over her whenever she thought of him. This was a present. She would be glad for it. Besides, she’d only seen the insta-kill arrows once before, in a demonstration Chiron had done on a strix that was flapping around the border. She still remembered how the thing had writhed around before melting into dust. It wasn’t even close to the worst thing she’d ever seen, but it had stuck in her mind harder than some of the truly horrific stuff.

“... Do you not like it? You’re being really quiet,” Alice fretted. 

“No, I like it. Just… Michael used to use these sonic arrows all the time when he was… you know.” She cleared her throat. “Scared for his life.”

“Michael?” Alice asked.

“Oh, shit, yeah. You guys never knew him. He was the head counselor before Will. Cool guy. Julia… I think Julia would have liked him especially. They’ve got the same temper. Firebrands, they were. He was tough as nails. Tiny guy, but seemed invincible to all of us.” She swallowed. “Clearly, he wasn’t actually unkillable.”

Alice was quiet. She climbed up the ladder and gave Kayla a hug. 

Kayla leaned into her. She smelled nice. “Thanks.”

Alice pulled away, ruffling her hair. “No problem.”

Kayla stuck out her tongue, flattening her hair. “You’re the worst.”

Alice grinned. “Thanks, I try. Anyway, should I go tell Julia that you liked the present?”

“We’ll both do it. I want to make sure her behavior change is legit.”

Alice shrugged. “That’s fair. I think she’s in the swordfighting arena, but I’m not sure. Julia doesn’t tell me where she is even when it would benefit both of us.”

“Julia has issues,” Kayla laughed, slipping out of her bunk. “Or at least, that’s what everybody says about her.” 

“She can be nice when she tries,” Alice insisted, landing on the floor right next to her. 

“We’ll see,” Kayla sighed. She crossed the cabin and grabbed some clothes from her footlocker before they both left the cabin. They hadn’t reached the border of the cabin main before an arm wrapped itself around Kayla’s waist and something cold and sharp pressed into the underside of her chin. 

“Julia? That you?”

“Aww, how could you tell?” came Julia’s voice behind her. She dropped the knife and appeared in front of Kayla. “Didja get my present?”

“Yeah, but I think it’s kind of funny that you’d give me a gift four days _prior_ to my actual birthday,” Kayla sighed. 

Julia’s eyes widened. “Wait, your birthday is…?” 

“September thirteenth,” Kayla laughed. “I figured if you liked me so much, you’d have known that.”

Julia shifted. Her face turned almost as red as her hair. “... Yyyeah, I knew that. I just… had multiple gifts! Multiple gifts for a… uh… girl who deserves multiple gifts!”

Kayla smiled. _She’s lying out her ass._ “Well, Jules, I look forward to receiving my multiple gifts. Maybe some of these won’t be weapons-related.”

Julia looked like she was going to throw up. “Alice, can you and I speak in private for a moment?”

Alice grinned at her. “Will do, Jules.” 

Julia grabbed Alice by the wrist and hauled her in the opposite direction. As they left, Kayla heard Alice say, “You know you brought this on yourself, right?”

Kayla laughed to herself and walked to the archery range. _Might as well keep my strength up. It only makes sense._


	12. You've Got Enough Trauma To Do Something Crazy To Yourself

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings for panic attacks.

She didn’t see Julia or Alice again for hours.  
She caught a quick glimpse of the two of them flying off on pegasi a little after lunch. How they’d gotten Chiron’s permission to leave camp, she had no idea. Maybe they’d bribed Mr. D. She didn’t know.

Will took her stitches out that night, as he’d promised. She had two tiny scars on either side of her neck, barely visible. _Not bad for something that could have been fatal._ They went back to the cabin, where Austin was waiting. They found him surrounded by wadded up sheets of paper, his head between his knees, his saxophone on the bed beside him. 

Kayla moved towards him. “You good?”

Austin groaned. 

Kayla put a hand on the back of his neck. He wasn’t feverish, but he was a little sweat-stickied. “Did you get sick or something? What are all these balls of paper?” She picked one of them up and unballed it. A few notes were scribbled on a musical staff, crossed out, then a few more were written on the next line down. Those were crossed out with even more fury and a few more were written before the words “fuck this” were scribbled in the margin of the paper. She figured that that had been when the paper was balled up and discarded. 

“I think it’s time for you to take a break,” Will cut in gently. 

“Hypocrite,” Austin grumbled. He pushed the balls of paper off the bed and curled up on his side. 

Kayla put her hand on his shoulder. “Hey, it’s okay. You’re just burnt out, that’s all. Rest for tonight, and try it again when you’re well and rested.”

“I’m a shit musician,” Austin lamented. 

“Nobody who’s ever heard you play has said that,” Kayla huffed. “I mean, seriously, what other fourteen-year-old gets letters from Juilliard convincing them to apply? You’re something special, Austin.” She leaned in and kissed his cheek. “You just have burnout, that’s all.”

“You’re the best, you know that?” murmured Austin. “I mean, I want to give you the whole damn world.”

Kayla flopped down next to him. “Save it for my birthday. It’s only four days away.”

Austin sighed heavily. “I know.”

She gently rubbed circles on his back. “You sound like that’s stressful for you.”

“Don’t worry about it,” huffed Austin. 

“The song was for me, wasn’t it?”

Austin was quiet. 

“It was!” Kayla cooed. “You were gonna write me a song for my birthday!” She grabbed him in a spoon-hug. “You’re the sweetest.”

Austin huffed. “It’s not sweet if I can’t fucking _write the damn song.”_

“The thought is still sweet,” Kayla reassured. “And look, you’re not unable. You’ve just been overthinking this. Remember, Austin, you’re a _jazz musician._ You do best when you’re not thinking about it.”

Austin rolled over onto his back, gently shoving her off. “That… actually helps. Thanks a lot.”

Kayla laughed. “Thanks. You’re welcome, of course.”

“I need a shower,” Will announced, breaking the silence. “If Nico comes in for any reason, tell him I’ll be out in a few moments. If he comes in screaming, get me immediately.”

“So you can come rushing in with your dick out to save the day?” asked Kayla. 

“I mean, I’d cover up first. I’m not an animal,” Will said sanctimoniously. 

Kayla just sighed. “Go bathe. Gross-ass.”

Will laughed and left for the bathroom. Kayla heard the water turn on. She could hear Will begin to sing, barely more audible than the steamy stream of the shower. Will had a lovely voice, but he only sang in large groups or in the shower where he thought no one could hear him. The rest of the cabin had a pact to never tell him how thin the walls really were. His voice was velvety and sweet, an even tenor that dipped into bass range when he was emotional. Kayla was always shocked by how perfectly his singing voice matched his personality, the warmth, the sweetness. She closed her eyes and enjoyed it for the little amount of time she could. 

A loud thump broke her out of her reverie. Austin yelped. She looked over. Nico was cowering against the bunks along the side of the wall. His eyes were bright with terror. Kayla crossed the room, approaching him despite the shadows twisting around him. Nico huffed a few shallow gasps, pressing himself further against the bunk, tears pooling in his eyes. 

“Hey… it’s okay,” Kayla tried. “It’s just me.” She knelt next to him, reaching for his hand.

“Don’t… don’t… don’t… I’m gonna… I could…” Nico choked on a whimper.

“Don’t touch you?” Kayla asked.

Nico studied her wide, vacant, terrified eyes. They seemed to calm slightly the more he looked at her. Finally, he nodded. 

“Okay,” Kayla whispered. “I won’t.” She turned to Austin. “Get Will.”

Austin set his jaw and nodded. He knocked on the bathroom door. “Will! It’s your boy!”

“Just a second!” Will called. 

Austin turned. “Okay,” he whispered. 

“Okay,” Kayla echoed, no louder. She turned back to Nico. “Your boy’s coming. He needs to finish in the shower, dry off and dress. He’ll be right out.”

Nico heaved a breath, a small tear escaping down his cheek. 

“How about we step outside for a minute?” Kayla asked. “That helps me when I’m upset.”

Nico nodded. He stood up, hugging himself tightly. Kayla led him to the front step, not actually touching him, just hovering a hand over his back. He leaned heavily against the doorframe, breathing deeply of the sweet fall evening air. The shadows that swirled around him calmed as he stood there, his eyes falling closed. A tear trickled slowly down his pale cheek. Kayla wanted to wipe it away, but she didn’t want to make him any worse, so she refrained. 

Finally, Nico took a deep breath. “Can I… can I hold your hand… please?”

Kayla took his hand, wordlessly. His hand was bony, callused and freezing cold. 

“Thanks,” he whispered. “I… I’m always scared I’ll… I don’t want to hurt anyone. When the shadows are coming… coming out… that’s what… I use that to _kill_ people, Kay. I can’t... that’s why I can’t be touched when I’m upset.” He sniffled. “I’d never forgive myself if I hurt or killed you. I don’t think Will would ever forgive me either.”

Kayla squeezed his hand. “You wouldn’t hurt me.”

Nico didn’t respond to that for the longest time. “I hope not.”

“Nico? You okay, my little dark lord?” came Will’s gentle voice from behind them. 

Nico jumped slightly, but he turned, wrapping his shockingly-thin arms around Will as Will embraced him, stroking his hair gently. He lifted Nico in his arms, and Nico didn’t resist. 

“... You smell nice,” Nico mumbled. 

“Thanks, I just got out of the shower,” Will replied.

“Yeah. Your hair is wet,” Nico whispered. “... I don’t mind, though. You’re warm.”

Will smiled. “That’s the Apollo kid in me coming out.”

Nico sighed a little. “I think I like that.”

Will carried him inside, laying him down on his bed. “Here. Let’s cuddle for a moment. I think you need it. Do you need to sleep in the infirmary tonight? We can both stay there.”

Nico swallowed. “But… your siblings.”

Will kissed the tip of his nose, making Nico’s eyes cross. “They’ll live.”

“Yeah, Nico, Austin and I will be fine if left to our lonesome. I’d rather you get help,” Kayla soothed.

“I’m with Kayla,” Austin murmured. 

Nico was quiet for a few moments. Will pet his hair. He nuzzled into the touch and breathed out a sigh. “... Yeah. I’ll go to the infirmary.”

Will scooped him up and held him close. “Let’s go, then. Austin, Kay, you know what to do. I’ll be back in the morning to take you all to breakfast. If you need me, take the harpy-beating stick and run to the infirmary, okay?”

“Okay,” Austin agreed. 

Kayla nodded.

Will’s face softened. “I love you both. Take care of each other.” He leaned in and kissed both of their foreheads. “I’ll see you two tomorrow.”

“See you tomorrow,” Austin replied softly.

“Love you too, Will,” Kayla murmured. 

Will left, Nico safe in his arms. 

Kayla sighed. “Well, that was a fuckin’ ordeal. Poor Nico.”

Austin shook his head. “Yeah. Thank the gods for Will. I don’t know what we’d do without him.”

  
  


Kayla didn’t sleep soundly that night. 

She didn’t know why. It was weeks after the Manhattan anniversary and months before the Nero one. September wasn’t a bad month. It had never been a bad month. So why was she sleeping so fitfully? Why was she seeing shadows in the corners of her sleeping mind? Why was she convinced that there was someone moving by her bed? Why did she wake in a blind panic, hollering and gasping and hitting into the dark at an unknown enemy? 

It didn’t end until Austin called softly to her from his bed, inviting her to come and rest in a safer place. She obliged, crawling to his bed and lying on his chest. He was warm, and it put her back to sleep in seconds. 

She wasn’t sure which woke her, Will slipping back into the cabin or the shadowy light of dawn. She lifted her head off of Austin’s chest. “Will?”

Will smiled. “Yeah. It’s me. Nico… he’s not going back to sleep.”

“Did you two stay up all night?” Kayla whispered. 

Will chuckled. “No, no. He woke up a few minutes ago and said he wasn’t gonna get any more sleep. What he _said_ was that all he needed was a shower. What’s probably gonna _happen_ is that he’ll shower and then immediately go curl up in a chair in the infirmary and sleep some more. I told him I would stay with him some more if he needed me to, that it didn’t bother me, but he just said he was fine, and that I should check on you two.” He sat down on Austin’s bed. “How did you sleep?”

Kayla gave a small groan. “Not well. Why do you think I’m sleeping with Austin?”

Will leaned in and kissed her forehead. “I’m so sorry, baby girl. Maybe I should have brought you to the infirmary as well.”

“And leave Austin alone? No way,” Kayla giggled. “He and I stick together. No way I’m just gonna let him stay alone in the cabin.”

Will grinned. “You’re too sweet. Either way, the horn doesn’t sound for another half hour, so try and rest until then, okay?”

Kayla stretched. “I want to get my bow and practice.”

“Practice what, sniping harpies? You’ll get your ass kicked,” Will chided. “I’m going to rest. Don’t mind me.” He floated over to his bed and pulled something out from a box underneath, pulling back the curtain in his bunk area to let in the thin light. 

Kayla could hear the scratch of pencil on paper from Austin’s bed. Will’s writing was another thing that the cabin had made a pact not to mention to him. Medicine wasn’t the only thing Will had inherited from their father. He was as skilled a poet as they come, at least to Kayla, who, up until two years prior, had thought her last name had two Ls and no W or K. Kayla could count on one hand all of the times she’d had to write.

She sighed. Austin was comfortable, but it was getting too warm. She picked herself up off of Austin’s chest, gently disentangling herself from his arms and tiptoeing back to her bunk. She climbed the ladder gently and…

… there was a box on her pillow. 

She opened it, very carefully, using the slowly increasing morning light to guide her. Inside were a few small bottles and something shiny. She looked closer. It was a small charm of some kind, some bottles of hair dye and a note. 

_Hey._

_I have no idea if yu’re actually still on the dyed hair thing, but I figured yu’ve got enough trauma and shit to do something crazy to urself, right? Anyway, I got yu a few bottles. Different colors._

_Oh, yeah, and the charm thing reminded me of yu. Yu can throw it out if yu hate it. I won’t be mad._

_-Juuuuules_

“What’s that?” came a voice from behind her. 

She turned. “Austin! Gods, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to wake you.” She cleared her throat. “And Julia gave me more gifts. She gave me some magic arrows yesterday and some more hair dye and stuff today.”

“I swear, she’s in love with you,” Will insisted. “You should ask her about that. The infirmary’s available if you need a private place to talk.”

Kayla bit her lip. _I shouldn’t, but…_ She sighed. “Actually… we talked about that a couple days ago.”

“And?”

“You’re right. She was in love with me. She was… apparently her mother wasn’t… apparently she was really angry about it.” Kayla took a deep breath. “Scarred Julia real bad. That’s why she was mean to me. Because… she hoped it would make her feelings go away.”

The cabin was deathly silent for a long time. 

Finally, Will broke the silence. “... Did she tell you it was okay to tell us?”

“... I didn’t ask.”

Will sighed. “Well, I won’t tell anyone. But in the future, you should ask someone if they’re okay with you telling people if they’re in that situation. They’re already really fragile, they don’t need any more.”

Kayla’s eyes stung. “... I’m sorry.”

“It’s not your fault,” Will replied, his voice gentle. “It’s a good thing you don’t have to know these things. Just remember that for next time. Obviously, neither Austin or I really care which way she swings, but some people will, so…”

Kayla lifted the small charm from the box. It was in the shape of a sun, but the center was a heart. It was golden and beautiful. She slipped it on her camp necklace and tied it back around her neck. “... Yeah. I’m sorry. Just forget I ever said anything. I’m gonna go shower.” Kayla quickly grabbed some clean clothes and slipped into the bathroom. Her chest jerked uncontrollably and tears slipped down her cheeks. She’d left the bundle in her footlocker. She was starting to think she shouldn't have.

She’d messed everything up. She always messed everything up. Now Julia was _really_ going to hate her. The fragile little thing they’d built was as good as gone. She sobbed out loud, hitting the chipped tile wall a few times as she got into the shower. The water was warm, but there was no comfort in it. Only pain. 

_“Deserves multiple gifts.” Such bullshit. I don’t deserve one gift. I do everything wrong. All I do is hurt people. If Will is the healing part of Apollo, then I’m the slow-creeping disease. I infect and infect and infect, hurt people beyond measure, and then I slink back to my sweet brothers and force them to help me. I’m fucking worthless._

She forced herself to wash off, hiccuping and sniffling. The world was spinning. Her chest felt like it was about to explode. She coughed, hard, as if that would expel the terrible feeling from her chest. Her throat was possessed by the need to cough. She couldn’t breathe. 

She crawled out of the shower and wrapped herself in the towel, crying and choking into the scratchy fabric. Her thoughts were racing too hard. She couldn’t calm down.

Finally, there was a knock at the door. Kayla hugged herself tightly. “Wha… wha… wha… wha?”

“It’s me.” Will. Of course. Will. “You need help?”

“... O… one… one… one… second,” Kayla forced. She pulled on clothes and stumbled out of the bathroom, still hiccuping and sniffling. 

Will held out his arms. “Come here.”

Kayla flopped against his chest. He carried her to his bed and sat down. Austin joined them, holding her hand. Will took a deep breath. “Kay, you’re not a bad person for telling us about Julia. It’s not a big deal, really. I was just trying to help. I’m so sorry I hurt you this badly.”

Kayla sniffled. “I’m just scared that… that… that Julia’s gonna hate me now.” Her voice broke. “I don’t want her to hate me.”

Will kissed the top of her head. “She probably won’t since it’s just Austin and me, but if she does, we’ll deal with it together, okay?”

Kayla nodded, her panicked gasps and chokes calming at the contact. 

“Did you hurt yourself at all?” Austin cut in. 

Kayla shook her head. 

“Thank the gods,” Austin exclaimed. 

Will exhaled. “Thank _you,_ Kayla.”

Kayla closed her eyes. She didn’t know how to respond, so she just lay in Will’s arms, feeling the world close in until it was just her and her brothers, safe and warm in Will’s bunk.

The horn sounded suddenly, jolting her fully awake. “Breakfast?”

“Not yet. That’s the wake-up horn,” Will murmured. 

“I wonder if… if Julia is awake yet,” Kayla sniffled.

“You want to talk to her?” Will asked.

“She’s a Hermes kid. She’ll find out eventually. And you know I can’t lie, at least not without my tell going off.”

Will sighed. “Okay. Just… tell me if she yells at you, okay?”

Kayla squeezed both Austin and Will and stood up. “I will.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy birthday, Nico! Sorry for giving you two panic attacks in one day! (I did a chapter of my drabble doc where he has a panic attack today as well too)
> 
> Also, idk how I feel about this chapter, but it is what it is. Also, I've already started on the next chapter, so it should be out soon.


	13. When You Just Wake Up

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings for internalized homophobia, minor witchcraft, brief description of a topless male.

Kayla knocked on the door of the Hermes cabin. Cecil opened it wearing only sweatpants. “Oh, hey, Kay.”

“Um.” She tried to look anywhere but Cecil’s bare chest, which was covered in strange, ritualistic Sharpie scribbles. Kayla recognized them as Lou Ellen’s sigils. “Is Julia up?”

Cecil looked behind him. “Kinda. Jules? Kayla’s here for you.”

Julia peeked out from behind Cecil. Kayla wanted to gasp. She looked so different when she’d first woken up. Her hair was out of its braids and had fluffed around her face. She was wearing an oversized tee shirt that bagged loosely over her athletic frame. Kayla couldn’t tell if she was wearing anything beneath it. Her arms were crossed over her chest. “Kay? You good?”

“I… um… I’m sorry,” she blurted. 

“Did you hate the gift or something?” She cocked her head. 

“No, the gifts were great. Thank you for all of them. I’m sorry because… because Will said that you were obviously in love with me and I said… I said… I confessed everything. I told him and Austin… about you. I’m so, so sorry.”

Julia huffed, squeezing her eyes shut. “And now Will’s gonna tell… well, Cecil already knows, but Lou Ellen’s gonna find out, and Lou Ellen tells Miranda, and Miranda tells Sherman, and Sherman tells Ellis, and Ellis tells Malcolm, and Malcolm tells Annabeth, and Annabeth tells Percy, and then the entire damn world finds out. And then someone beats the shit out of me.”

“... I’m sorry.” Kayla’s voice broke. “I’m so, so sorry.”

Julia scanned her. Then she sighed. “This place is a safe place. I’m not… that concerned about the people here. I mean, no one messes with Will, or Nico, or even Mitchell from Aphrodite. I just fucking…” She shook her head. “I’m so sorry. I’m not… Kay, I don’t… look, I know that there’s nothing to be scared of. I know I’m not gonna get hurt over this, or at least not here. I don’t know why I’m scared.” Julia sighed, a shadow of vulnerability crossing her face. “But I am. I’m so, so  _ fucking _ scared and… and I don’t know  _ why.”  _ Her voice broke a little. 

Kayla stepped closer. “Hey, don’t cry. You’re okay. Do you need a hug? May I hug you?”

Julia sighed and nodded. 

Kayla wrapped her arms around Julia’s waist, burying her face in her shoulder in a comforting manner. Julia returned the embrace, leaning into her shorter body, nuzzling her hair. “You shower or something?” Julia mumbled.

“Yeah,” Kayla replied. 

“Nice,” Julia sighed. “Yeah, you smell like honey and strawberries. Your hair is really soft, too. I probably smell like shit, honestly.”

“Nah,” Kayla replied. And it was true. Julia smelled like spray deodorant and hair oils. Nothing that was bad. 

“Thanks,” Julia whispered into Kayla’s hair. 

They separated after a moment. Julia put her arms over her chest again. “Thank you,” she murmured. “It… it means a lot.”

Kayla smiled. “No problem. Seriously, don’t be scared. People here are nice. You’ll be okay.”

Julia gave her a thin smile. “Yeah, I know. I’m… yeah. Cecil and Alice told me the same thing. I just… it’s hard to believe sometimes, you know?”

“I know, yeah,” Kayla nodded. “I’m really sorry.”

Julia laughed drily. “Not your fault, Kaykay. Anyway, I’ve gotta go. I need to shower before these bastards make me scream at them.” She sighed. The last thing Kayla heard before the door closed was, “CECIL, IS YOUR SHIRT FUCKING ALLERGIC TO YOUR CHEST?” 

Kayla shook her head, giggling. She made her way back to the Apollo cabin. Will accosted her as soon as she entered. “How did it go?”

“Better than expected,” Kayla sighed. “She didn’t start screaming or panicking or anything, at least not that I saw, but I don’t know.”

Will visibly relaxed. “Thank the gods. Listen, if anything changes, I’m here, okay?” He crossed the room, taking her in a hug. “It’s gonna be okay, baby. I’ll find a way to make it okay.”

Kayla squeezed him tightly. “I… you really,  _ really  _ don’t have to do that.”

Will laughed. “Look, man, I can deal with cruelty. I have a lot of practice disarming angry and cruel people. If you have a skill that helps people, you owe it to society to help people with said skill. Or at least that’s what I believe.”

Kayla pulled out of the embrace just as the breakfast horn rang. “I’m hungry. Let’s go get some food.”

Will chuckled again. “Yes, let’s go.”

They walked to the dining pavilion. Cecil accosted them as soon as they arrived. “Kayla, what did you do?”

Kayla flinched. “What… what do you mean?”

“As soon as you left, Julia got in the shower and just started screaming and throwing stuff. She wouldn’t tell me why she was upset, either. What happened?”

Kayla’s eyes stung. “I… I told Will and Austin that she had a crush on me,” she murmured under her breath. “I apologized, but… apparently it wasn’t enough.”

Cecil sighed. “Yup, that’ll do it. I wish she would have told me. I could have reassured her it was all okay.”

“I tried to,” Kayla murmured. “Apparently she still needed to scream it out or something, I don’t know.”

“Sometimes that’s just how it is,” came a voice from behind the group.

Kayla jumped, then burst into giggles. “Nico! Don’t sneak up on people like that!”

Nico bit his lip; despite his best efforts, the corner of his lip still twitched up. “Sorry, guys. Anyway, yeah, give her her scream time. It’s better to howl and scream now than can it all and become a repressed asshole like myself.”

“You’re… really not an asshole,” Kayla laughed. “You’re actually really nice.”

“Shut up,” Nico sighed. He walked over and poured his entire plate of food into the campfire. 

Will looked on in horror. “What are you going to  _ eat?”  _ he called.

Nico just huffed. Kayla could sense that Nico was rolling his eyes, even though she couldn’t see his face. He returned to Will’s side and leaned against him. Will put his arm around him and escorted them all to the table where they got food. Nico, predictably, did not grab anything. Will scowled. “Nico, you need to eat. You need the sustenance. That is not up for discussion. Doctor’s orders.”

Nico groaned. He grabbed an apple off the table.

“That’s all?”

“An apple a day keeps the doctor away,” Nico replied. 

Will stuck his tongue out at Nico. “You’re the worst.”

“Categorically untrue,” responded Nico. 

They made their way over to the corner of the pavilion where they normally ate. Will started attempting to feed Nico bits of sausage, but he leaned away from Will’s fork before he could get it anywhere near his mouth.

Kayla had the sudden mental image of herself trying to fork-feed Julia. Somehow it hurt. 

She thought about the bottles of hair dye still sitting on her bunk. Her fingers found the charm on her necklace and she twisted it gently around her fingers. She suddenly wondered if someday she and Julia would have the sort of casually soft relationship that Will and Nico had. She didn’t know why, but suddenly she wanted that so  _ badly  _ and she couldn’t shake the longing. It was worse than when she’d been in love with Lou Ellen. At least she’d always kind of known Lou Ellen was off-limits. 

She looked over her shoulder, trying to see if she could see Julia or Alice anywhere. Julia and Alice were at the Hermes cabin table. Julia had her head in her arms. Alice had an arm around Julia. 

Kayla’s stomach sank. She sighed. “Guys, I need to go for a second.”

Will nodded. “Tell me if anything goes wrong, okay?”

“Will do,” Kayla sighed.

She crossed the dining pavilion to where Julia was sitting. Julia seemed to notice her before she’d even arrived. “What do you want?”

“Are… are you mad at me?” Kayla asked.

Julia huffed. She looked up. Her eyes were red. “Look, Kayla, I want to beat the shit out of you. I want to slam you down on the concrete and put so many stab wounds in you that your blood covers the entire gods damned pavilion. But I can’t do that. Because it’s not your fault. You’ve been nothing but supported your whole life. You’ve been raised in a great environment. Of course it would be hard for you to see the other side.”

“But that’s not right! It’s not right that I hurt your feelings!”

Julia sighed. “You’re right. But you didn’t mean to do it. Don’t… don’t feel guilty. My problem, not yours.”

Kayla was quiet. “... Aren’t you going to yell at me? It’s too weird that you’re being nice to me. Please, scream at me and call me a piece of shit.”

Julia was silent. She only shook her head. “No, you’ll cry.”

“You never had any qualms about making me cry before!”

“That was because I’d always leave before you actually started crying, Kayla. Do you have any idea how you look when you cry?”

“Yeah. My face goes all red. Why?”

“You look fuckin’ wrecked. It hurts to hell to see. So no, I don’t ever want to make you cry again. So no, I’m not going to scream or yell. I’m sure Cecil already told you about my shower freakout.”

“He did,” Kayla confirmed.

“Yeah. Thought he would,” Julia sighed. “Anyway, look, I’m upset, yes, but not at you. More like I’m angry at society.”

“We do live in a society,” Alice cut in solemnly.

“Shut the fuck up, Alice, you total loser. I’m not mad anymore. Just kind of hollow. Like, I could beat you up, but I don’t feel like it, not really. I just… I hate myself. I hate both of us.” Julia put her head back on the table. 

Kayla sat next to her. “I’m so sorry,” she whispered. “I’m so, so sorry.”

Julia sighed softly. “... It isn’t your fault.”

Kayla leaned her head on Julia’s shoulder. Julia didn’t shake her off. Julia smelled like strawberries, like the camp-provided shampoo. “You smell nice,” Kayla whispered.

Julia just sighed. “Yeah. I bet I do.”

“You know… I want what Will and Nico have.”

“What do you mean?” Julia asked flatly.

“I want a soft relationship. I want someone to feed me bits of apples and cheese, or vice-versa. I want someone to cuddle me when I’m upset and try to kiss it better. I want someone I get to freak out over whenever they get small and marginal wounds. I just… I want a soft relationship, you know?”

Julia huffed. “I think that’s a lot of us, Kay.”

Kayla sighed. “Yeah… I guess so.”

They were quiet. Finally, Kayla sighed and moved away. “Well… I’m gonna go eat now. I’ll see you later, I guess.”

“Yeah,” Julia mumbled. “I’ll see you later, Kay. Don’t get all guilty about this. We’re good. I’m not mad.”

“Thank you so much,” Kayla said, her voice soft. 

“Yeah, no problem,” Julia muttered flatly.

Kayla made her way back towards her normal breakfast group. She couldn’t help but notice that Lou Ellen had appeared and was sitting between Nico and Cecil. She sat between Will and Austin. “Well, I talked to her.”

“How’d it go?” Austin asked. 

“She’s still not mad. I don’t know why she’s not mad. She says she’s just too tired, and that she’s mad at society, not me, and that she doesn’t want to make me cry.”

“Wait, what happened?” Lou asked.

“Apparently Julia actually  _ was  _ in love with Kayla,” Will sighed. “She’s been giving her gifts and stuff and suddenly being really nice. Kind of weird.”

“Yeah. She’s got repression issues; that’s why she was such a jerk to me,” Kayla sighed. “What shocks me is that Cecil apparently knew the whole time and he never told any of us.”

Cecil wiggled his fork. “Because she wouldn’t want that. That’s why.”

Kayla took a bite of her bagel. “You’re a better fuckin’ ally than I am, apparently.”

Cecil shrugged. He gave a small smirk. “Yeah, well, fuckin’… I’ve got a shitload of practice protecting our boy over here.” He cocked his head towards Will. “Also, it’s not your fault you were raised sheltered.”

“Thanks,” Kayla sighed depressively. 

“But let’s be cheerier. I’m done being sad,” Cecil announced. “I have a cool idea we could all do after breakfast. We could bring Julia and Alice, too.”

“They won’t come if I’m there,” Nico sighed.

“They will if I ask them,” Cecil shrugged. “They’re not  _ that  _ scared of you. Just don’t start summoning stuff and we’ll be fine and dandy.  _ Especially  _ when I tell them what I’ve got.”

Will looked at him warily. “What… do you have?”

Cecil grinned. “Well, the Stolls sent us a gift a little while back to celebrate Connor getting settled in college--”

“Okay, no,” Will sighed. “If the Stolls are involved with a scheme, I’m not. I like them just fine. They’re cool guys, funny. And Travis is really a nice guy under all the bullshit. But they’re both fucking morally bankrupt and every time I play into one of their plots I feel just a little bit dirtier.”

“It’s not like that,” Cecil insisted. “This one is actually cool.”

“Fine.” Will put his head in his hands. “What is it?”

“Potato cannon!” Cecil said gleefully. 

“Oh, for fuck’s sake. You’re going to kill somebody,” Will sighed. 

“False,” Cecil cut in. “We’re gonna shoot it out over the sea. We’re not gonna hurt anyone. We’re just gonna blow off some steam. I think it’ll be good for some of us, Lou Ellen, Kayla and Julia in particular. Also, I think putting Julia and Kayla together in a semi-public, calm, supportive social environment would be good for both of them.”

“How the fuck is firing off a potato cannon considered a  _ calm environment _ in your tiny mind?”

“It’s calmer than basically everything else here save arts and crafts and the damn strawberries, which are Miranda’s babies anyway,” Cecil shot back. 

Will was quiet. “Still.”

Cecil made a face. “Still,” he mocked.

“Okay. that’s just unnecessary,” Will grumbled.

“Anyway, are you coming on this adventure, dearest William?” Cecil asked. “Or will you sit alone in sorrow and infirmary and feel sad all day?”

Will huffed. “Well, now I  _ have  _ to come. If for no other reason, than to make sure none of you kill yourselves.” 

Cecil stuck his tongue out. “We won’t. Don’t worry your little fuzzy head about it.”

Will only rolled his eyes. “I’ll try not to.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I promise, next chapter will be the potato cannon chapter. I just wanted to try and resolve some of the Julia stuff before I wrote that.


	14. The Potato Cannon Chapter

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings for mentioned abuse. But this is the potato cannon chapter, as promised.

Cecil led the group to the hill he’d picked out right after breakfast. 

Kayla walked next to him. Suddenly, he sighed. “You know, I’m worried about Lou Ellen.”

Kayla cocked her head. “Why?”

“She’s just… she’s been having a hard time processing some stuff,” Cecil sighed. “Her father… well, he wasn’t a good guy, and she knew it, but she didn’t know the extent of the abuse. She’s been having a hard time processing it.”

Kayla swallowed. “... And… what was the extent of the abuse? Nico said it was bad, but he didn’t say what happened, or who it happened to. I mean, was it all of you? Just Lou Ellen? Just you? Just… just Will?”

“I don’t want to talk about it,” Cecil said flatly. He beckoned them to the top of a hill overlooking the sea. A strange contraption of PVC pipes sat on a few cinder blocks. “Alright, we’re here.” He grabbed the contraption, opened up one end, sprayed something in it from a can at his belt and put it back together. He slammed a potato into one end and passed the whole thing to Lou Ellen. “I think you should try it first.”

Lou Ellen looked at it, then pointed it directly at Cecil. “How do I work this?”

“Okay, first, don’t point it at me,” Cecil said. He gently put his arms on her shoulders and turned her around, putting the cannon in position on her shoulder. “Point it out at the sea. Secondly, when you actually want to shoot it, you just push this little trigger here.”

She pulled the trigger. The thing fired with a large explosion. Lou Ellen reeled a bit.

“Apparently it kicks a little,” Cecil shrugged. “Just be careful of that.”

“Oh, you think?” Lou Ellen asked. She pushed the cannon back into Cecil’s hands.

Cecil chuckled and turned to give the cannon to Kayla. “Here. You’re good with range weapons. You try.” He pushed another potato into it.

Kayla tentatively took it. “I’ve only fired a gun like, twice. I’m an archer, not a rifleman,” she sighed. She held it anyway, as tightly as she could, before pulling the trigger. It kicked more than she thought it would, but she kept hold of it, and the potato in question screamed into the horizon until it could no longer be seen. 

She laughed. “Julia, you should try this.”

Julia took it from her. She looked around, then put another potato into it and shot it into the sand. Sand exploded out from the now beachball-sized crater with a  _ floom _ ! Julia chuckled. “Nice.”

“You could have hurt somebody,” Will nagged.

“Okay, boomer,” Julia replied, not bothering to look at Will. She put another potato in and put another crater right in front of the first one. 

Will looked at Cecil like,  _ she’s  _ your  _ sister.  _

Cecil looked over at Julia. “Julia, stop being an asshole.”

Julia pointed the potato cannon at him.

“That’s the exact wrong direction, Jules,” Cecil huffed. 

Julia’s finger crept towards the trigger.

_ “Julia,”  _ Cecil warned. 

Suddenly, Julia broke into giggles. She turned the cannon and put a third crater by the first two. “You guys are no fun.”

“And you’re even worse!” Cecil protested. “Here, I think Lou Ellen should take another turn.”

“No, give it to me!” Alice begged. “I want a turn!”

Julia handed it to Alice. Alice shot a crater right next to Julia’s craters. 

“You two are awful,” Cecil snapped. He snatched the cannon from Alice and handed it to Lou Ellen. Lou Ellen took another shot out over the sea. Her teeth were gritted. Kayla could see the tension and anger in her body. She felt a shock of sorrow. Lou Ellen was struggling, and she’d shoved her away before she could help. 

Lou Ellen fired another potato, then turned and gave the cannon to Nico. “Here. I think it’s time for you to take a turn.”

Nico blushed lightly. He took it carefully in hands that always looked fragile to Kayla. Cecil moved quickly over to assist Nico in firing it. Kayla moved over to Lou Ellen. “Hey.”

“Hey,” Lou Ellen replied. 

“You all right?”

Lou Ellen huffed. “Yeah. I’m fine. Why do you ask?”

“Because you seemed really upset, that’s why,” Kayla replied. 

“Okay, look. Kayla. Yes, there’s some stuff going on. But seriously, it’s none of your business.” She flinched at the  _ boom  _ of the cannon as Nico fired it. “It’s between me, Cecil and Will at this point. If Will decides to bring you in, that’s his decision to make. Not mine. ‘Kay?”

“O… okay,” Kayla stammered. 

“There’s one left, because Julia hogged a third of them,” Cecil cut in. “Austin, you want a turn?”

Austin’s face lit up. He’d been a little spaced out since they’d arrived, sitting on the grass and staring out to sea. “Yeah, sure!” He stood up and ran over to Cecil, who helped him fire the last spud out over the sea. He laughed out loud. “Yeah, I can see why Julia would want to fire this three times.”  
Julia grinned at him. “See? He gets it.”

Austin chuckled. “Yeah. I’m gonna go. I have something I have to do. I’ll see you guys at lunch, I guess.”

Kayla held out her arms. “Before you go, where’s my hug?”

Austin laughed and gave her a quick squeeze. “Love you, Kay.” He let go of her and ran off.

“Love you too,” Kayla said to his retreating back. 

“I gotta go, too,” Julia cut in. “I’ve gotta take the cabin to the climbing wall. Cecil, you gonna come?”

Cecil shrugged. “I need a moment to clean up, but sure, Lou and I will be there.”

Will sighed. “And there’s no way I can justify leaving the infirmary untended for as long as I have.”

“I want to come with you,” Kayla blurted. “You and Nico, I mean.”

Will gave her a quizzical look. “Okay, I guess,” he shrugged.

The three of them walked to the infirmary as the group dispersed. Kayla shuffled her feet. “... So… um… Will?”

“Yeah?”

“What’s the deal with… what’s Lou Ellen’s deal?”

“Please don’t make me talk about it,” Will huffed. His voice sounded like broken glass, like if she stuck her hand in it too far, she’d get cut. 

“I’m worried about her,” Kayla said quietly. “I’m worried about both of you.”

“Look, Kay.” His voice was sharp. He turned towards her, a rare scowl dominating his features. “We… Cecil and I fucked up. Her father did some stuff to me--to  _ us  _ that Lou Ellen didn’t know about. That’s it. It’s fine. You  _ don’t  _ need to worry about it. Capisce?”

Kayla shrank back from Will’s anger. “O-okay.”

Will must have seen the terror in her face, because his features softened. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt you. I just… look, I  _ really  _ don’t want to talk about it. I don’t want to hurt in my own right. I don’t want to hurt  _ you.” _

“I just want you guys to be okay,” Kayla blurted. “You and Cecil and Lou Ellen are precious to me. I don’t want you guys to be in pain.”

Will moved in and wrapped her in a hug. Kayla reciprocated, holding onto him as he squeezed her tightly. He sighed softly, breathing out into her hair. 

“Just tell me you’re gonna be okay.” Kayla’s voice cracked. “Please, just tell me you’re gonna be okay.”

Will took a deep breath. “... Yeah. I’m gonna be okay. I’m in a good spot now. I’ve got a good boyfriend, and good friends, and a wonderful little brother and sister--” He kissed her head, “--who treat me like gold. I’m just fine now.”

Kayla closed her eyes. “... I’m so glad, Will. Just… if it gets to be too much…” She swallowed. “... I’m here, okay?”

Will squeezed her impossibly tighter. “Thank you so much, Kayla. It means… it means a lot.”

Kayla took a breath. “... It’s fine.”

Will let her go, taking her hand. “Let’s get to the infirmary. I don’t want to dawdle much longer.”

“You’re right. Let’s go.”


	15. Is That Weird?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Julia and Kayla talk. Then, that night Austin needs help and Kayla helps him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Austin is criminally underrepresented in my works.

Later that day, Julia approached her while she was practicing in the archery range. 

She walked up and picked up a bow and arrow, carefully nocking it and focusing in on the target. Her shot missed the target by an inch or two, flying into the brush. Julia swore and tried again. This time it hit, but only barely. 

“Well done,” Kayla praised, breaking the silence. 

“Right. Does it seem quiet around here to you?” Julia blurted.

“I mean, it’s been a few days since the summer campers went home. That’s probably why it’s quiet. I mean, Hermes cabin in particular has to be loud as hell in the summer.”

Julia sighed. “Yeah. It is. We got a new Hermes kid this last summer on top of all the year-rounders, so that can’t help. Good news is, we finally found the fucker from Wisconsin that Dad allegedly wanted us to track down after Manhattan, so now hopefully it’ll be another few years before we have to deal with his bullshit again.”

“... Is the newbie nice?” Kayla tried.  _ Don’t mention the obvious daddy issues.  _

“He’s all right. Got a traveler’s spirit. Didn’t stay year-round because he and his mom were backpacking through Nepal. Got mad when we stole a chunky gold ring he had.”

“Why did you steal from him? He’s your brother!”

Julia shrugged, nocking another arrow. “Fun?”

Kayla huffed. “We have different definitions of  _ fun,  _ then.”

Julia loosed the arrow. This one hit the side of the target. “Apollo kids tend to have different definitions of  _ fun  _ than Hermes kids.”

Kayla snorted. “That’s true. You guys can be a bit… troubled.”

“Wait,  _ we’re  _ the troubled ones?” Julia asked. “Coming from the same cabin whose leader I’ve seen cry in counselor’s meetings? Whose only year-round female hits and cries in her sleep if you shake her bunk wrong?  _ We’re  _ the troubled ones?”

Kayla froze. “How do you know I hit and cry in my sleep if my bunk gets shaken wrong?”

Julia looked at her like she was a special kind of stupid. “How do you think all those presents have been getting to you? I repeat, you guys never lock your fucking windows. I’ve been climbing through the window in your bathroom and standing on the bottom bunk to your bunk bed to deliver ‘em. It’s a damned minefield, avoiding your fists.” Julia laughed drily, firing off another arrow. “You don’t make it easy, Kay, that’s for sure.”

Kayla paused. “... I… don’t know how to respond to that.”

Julia just snorted. “Then don’t.”

There was a long pause. Finally, Julia cleared her throat. “Hey, um…”

“Yeah?”

“You wanna, um…” Julia shifted, sending up little puffs of dust under her heels. “... come for a walk with me?”

“You mean just us? Alone? Without Alice or Austin or anyone?”

“Uh… yea… yeah.”

Kayla’s face broke into a wide grin. “Sure! I’d love to!”

Julia managed a smile. “Let’s go, then.” She beckoned her away. 

“But what about the archery range? What if I have to help someone?” 

Julia shrugged. “They can come find you, then. Or they can get Chiron. Or Austin. Or anyone else who can shoot.”

Kayla thought on it. “Okay. I can handle that.”

Julia nodded and grinned, a robber’s smile. She turned and beckoned Kayla away from the archery range. Kayla followed her. They walked in a deeply awkward silence for a few moments, away from the archery range, across the camp green, over to the canoe lake. The fall breeze was cool and soft in Kayla’s hair. She tucked a loose strand behind her ear. “So… um… how are you?”

Julia shrugged. “I’m all right.”

“You kind of hogged the potato cannon earlier,” Kayla accused.

“It was fun. So sue me.”

“Will and Cecil didn’t get turns.”

“Cecil would have taken a turn if he’d wanted one,” Julia shrugged. “Trust me, I know my brother.”

Kayla thought about it. “That’s true.”

“And the way Will was acting, it was like he didn’t  _ want  _ a turn.”

“Yeah, no, Will wouldn’t. He thinks that’s a death trap,” Kayla laughed. “If Will had his way, none of us would ever have fired that thing.”

“Is Will an overprotective brother?” Julia asked.

Kayla shrugged. “I think he would be  _ if  _ situations allowed. But he has to let us be in danger, because he has no choice.”

“Do you think he’d want to screen someone you were thinking of dating?”

“Yes, he absolutely would,” Kayla replied. “Austin, too.”

Julia was quiet for a few minutes. “So… um… do you like… uh… the climbing wall?”

“It’s all right. I was ten before I could actually get all the way to the top, but I like it all right.”

“... It’s my favorite place at camp. I can climb all the way to the top and see everything. I like that.”

“That’s good to know about you,” Kayla said. 

There was another awkward silence. Julia led her through a small thicket of trees to the edge of the lake, a cold, sparkly blue in the autumn light. She picked her way along the side of the canoe lake, Kayla following her. Finally, once there wasn’t enough space left to comfortably walk, she sat down. Kayla sat down next to her. 

“... Was it weird?” Julia asked.

“Was what weird?”

“Being raised here. Since infancy. Was that weird?”

Kayla thought. “... No, not really. Chiron treated me like I was his daughter. And I had a zillion older siblings. I didn’t feel like an orphan or an abandoned child at all. The one thing I do feel like I missed out on was formal education.”

Julia snorted. “You didn’t miss that much, trust me. I don’t think you would have liked it.”

Kayla skipped a stone. “You’re like the fifth person who’s told me that.”

“Means I’m right.”

Kayla laughed. “Yeah. The only time… the only time I felt abandoned was… was…” She swallowed. “It was when I finally contacted my mortal father for the first time, right after Manhattan. He… he… it was so awkward. At the end of the call, he just said… he just said it would be better if we didn’t talk. That I had my life and he had his and… and our worlds just weren’t compatible.”

Julia was quiet for a while. Finally, she patted Kayla’s shoulder. Julia's grip was firm, but warm.

“Thanks,” Kayla whispered.

“No problem,” Julia mumbled.

Kayla’s heart sank. “I’m sorry, I killed the mood, didn’t I?”

Julia shrugged. “Nah. I was the one who asked. How were you claimed?”

Kayla thought. “I… I was about five or so and learning how to shoot. Apollo claimed me in the archery range after I was hitting targets on my third try or so.” She laughed. “I don’t have that interesting of a claiming story, I’m sorry.”

Julia snorted. “Yeah. Not all of us got claimed in front of the entire camp like Jackson allegedly did.”

“No, but that story isn’t actually exaggerated,” Kayla laughed. “I was there. Trust me.”

Julia laughed shockedly. “Really?”

“Really. He really did get claimed in front of the whole camp. Chiron was as shocked as anybody.”

Julia shook her head. “I bet he was.”

“How were you claimed, by the way?” Kayla asked. 

Julia laughed. “Alice and I put superglue in Drew Tanaka’s mascara. She had to go to the infirmary to get her eyes unglued. I would have felt bad for her if she hadn’t called me a mangy, rat-faced bitch the previous day.”

Kayla laughed. “Yeah. Drew has some issues. I don’t know why she’s so mean all the time. I’ve always been convinced there’s a decent person under there somewhere, but no one I know has been able to access that.”

“Now that we can agree on,” Julia sighed. “Anyway, apparently that was a good enough prank to get Hermes’s attention. Also, Drew never spoke to me again, so there was some good that came out of it at least.”

“... I guess,” Kayla said. 

“--Or maybe the final tipping point for ol’ Hermy were the twenty chickens Alice and I loosed in the Big House two days later, same day it came out that it was us that put the superglue in the mascara.”

“Oh, gods, I remember that!” Kayla cried. “He was so upset! Said it took him-- wait,  _ twenty  _ chickens? He said he found nineteen!”

“Oh gods,” Julia laughed. “Gods’ speed, Hen Number 20. May the Fates take care of thee.”

“Hope we don’t find your skeleton somewhere in the basement.”

Julia snorted. “Yeah. Anyway, that was one of our best. Animals in places they shouldn’t be is a classic.”

Kayla shrugged. “I guess. I’ve never really been involved in something like that.”

Julia laughed. “You should be. It’s loads of fun.”

Kayla gave a small smile. “Maybe I’ll help you with one someday. As long as it’s a harmless one, I’m game.”

Julia smirked. “Never thought you’d be one to have fun. Yeah, sure, we can do that. I’ll let you know if we come up with something good.”

Kayla lay back, feeling the sun kiss her cheeks. The leaves above were painted in brilliant reds and oranges. “Sounds good. Thank you so much.”

Julia was quiet, but Kayla could feel the happiness radiating off of her. They lay in silence for a long time, but it was comfortable and warm. Kayla’s thoughts drifted. “You know, Jules, Austin’s single and he’s got, like, no friends.”

“So?” Julia asked.

“Alice is single, right?”

“You want to set Austin up with Alice?” Julia asked.

Kayla shrugged. “I mean, we could try.”

Julia grunted. “Maybe. I don’t know.”

“Is Alice into guys?”

“Think so,” Julia shrugged.

“Well, Austin is into girls. At least, I think it is. He’s written some music he describes as romantic, although none of it has lyrics. And he says he’s not gay. So… yeah. Also, Austin has  _ no  _ friends. I mean,  _ no  _ friends. That’s why I’m trying to set him up with someone. He needs the company so fucking badly. I can’t be his everything. I mean, what if I die?”

Julia sighed. “I don’t want to think about that. Anyway, about Alice and Austin, I just think that Austin might be a bit too much of a… not a  _ shut in,  _ but…”

“... a shut in?” Kayla asked.

“I guess,” Julia replied. “I mean, he’s just so far into his music that… does he ever do anything  _ else?” _

“Eats. Sleeps. Camp-wide activities. Sometimes he and I have talks. It’s nice when we talk.”

“Geez.”

“Yeah. I mean, I’m training for the Olympics and even I have fun sometimes,” Kayla sighed. “I mean, I’m practicing daily, but even I don’t practice to the degree that he does. It’s excessive.”

“Sounds like our boy needs to lighten up,” Julia said. “Would a nice little prank serve to help him any?”

“Probably not,” Kayla replied. “I think he needs to make some friends, not have chili pepper put in his shampoo.”

Julia nodded. “I guess that’s right. And you think setting him up with my sister would open him up?”

“Austin’s always gonna be an introvert. That’s not changing. I just think he needs a friend or a lover or something. And I was hoping your sister might work.”

Julia shrugged. “Maybe. If I… if we hang out with you and your brother’s friends more, they could get to know each other.”

“You’d be willing to do that? Even with Nico there? Because I’m not even gonna think about bringing you into the group of friends if you’re not gonna be nice to Nico.”

“Again, I don’t  _ dislike  _ Nico. I’m  _ afraid  _ of him, because he could  _ kill  _ me. But… yeah, I can put up with him. Honestly, I feel safer when Will is with him. Will seems… Will can manage him, I think.”

“Nico wouldn’t hurt anyone who’s not a threat,” Kayla insisted. “And I think you’ll see that too once you get to know him.”

“I hope so.” Julia didn’t sound convinced. “Anyway, yeah, I’ll hang out with you all, bring Alice over, see if I can get them talking. We’ll see what happens.”

“Nice! What about Cecil? Should we set him up too?”

“Nah, he and Lou Ellen are gonna wind up together. They love each other. They just can’t say it.”

A sharp throb stabbed through Kayla’s heart. She sat up and hugged herself. “Um… that’s nice.”

Julia was quiet for a moment. Finally, she said, “You were in love with Lou Ellen, right?”

Kayla nodded, tears stinging her eyes. 

Julia put an arm around Kayla’s shoulder. She didn’t say anything. Kayla slumped into her embrace and Julia held her, wordlessly, soundlessly. Julia’s hands were steady as she wiped Kayla’s tears, and she still did not speak. Kayla leaned her face into Julia’s hands and closed her eyes. Julia’s warm, small thumbs rubbed light circles on Kayla’s cheek, making her skin tingle under the touch. Kayla took a few deep breaths. When she was finally calm, she pulled away slightly. “... Thanks.”

Julia studied her, her blue-green eyes intense. “Yeah, no problem.”

Kayla couldn’t keep looking into those bright eyes. “... Right. Anyway… Lou Ellen. I’m getting over her. At least now I know it’s not happening so I can… you know. Move on.” She forced a smile.

Julia nodded. “It’s better that way, yeah.”

There was a crunching noise from above them and a figure came tumbling and crashing out of a nearby tree. A small female pressed herself up against the tree trunk. Julia’s arm suddenly felt far too heavy around Kayla’s shoulders. “Alice! What are you doing here?”

“You bitch!” Julia shrieked. She leapt at Alice, who bolted. Julia gave chase and the two of them disappeared into the trees. 

Kayla took a deep breath. She approached the tree Alice had fallen out of. “Anyone else up there?”

A very sheepish Cecil Markowitz came climbing down from the tree. “Oops. Sorry. In my defense, Will and Austin are in on this too, they’re just not up in the tree with us.”

“Where are they? Bushes?”

“Nah, they’re doing their separate things. They just wanted updates on what you guys were doing,” he shrugged. “Anyway, I’m gonna go give them the info, you wanna come?”

“You’re just gonna let Alice take the fall for all of this?” Kayla asked.

“Yes, because Julia won’t hurt her, and I doubt it would be the same for me,” Cecil replied.

“I feel like I should step in, though. Keep Alice safe.”

“She’ll be fine,” Cecil replied. “I swear, she will be fine.”

“If you insist,” Kayla sighed. “Anyway, sure, I’ll go talk to Will and Austin with you, why not?”

“Nice,” Cecil shrugged.

They walked in silence. Finally, Kayla cleared her throat. “Hey, Cecil, are you… um… are you in love with Lou Ellen? Julia says that Lou Ellen and you are in love.”

Cecil was quiet for a long time. He stared over the camp, brilliant flaming red in the autumn light. “... I’m in love with her. I don’t know how she feels about me.”

“Lou Ellen sucks to be in love with,” Kayla murmured.

“It’s gotta be worse if you’re female. She’s not into women at all. At least I have a damn chance with her. But yeah, she does.”

Kayla laughed weakly. “Now that we can both agree on.”

Cecil pushed into the infirmary just as Will wrapped a bandage around Austin’s knee. “Hey, man, results.”

“Oh?” Will didn’t look up. 

“We got caught. Alice’s branch broke and she fell out of the tree. They didn’t kiss or anything. It was all very innocent.”

“Okay,” Will shrugged. “And Julia’s still being nice?”

“Nicer than ever,” Kayla cut in. 

“Good, good.”

Kayla studied Austin’s knee. “How’d you get hurt?”

“Fell down a few steps in the amphitheatre,” Austin admitted sheepishly. “Skinned the living snot out of it. It’s not that bad, didn’t need stitches or anything, but it was bleeding a lot. I was just gonna ask for a bandaid or something, but Will insisted on putting on a bandage himself.”

“Because I wanted to make sure it was on right and wouldn’t bleed through or fall off or get dirt underneath,” Will replied. “I don’t want it to infect.”

“Will, it’s really not that bad,” Austin insisted.

Will sighed. “Well, maybe it’s not. But I like to feel like I can help you in some way. So let me bandage your knee and shut up about it.”

“Will do,” Austin sighed.

  
  
  
  
  


The rest of the day passed normally. The next time Kayla saw Alice, at dinner that night, she had a bruise under her eye. 

Kayla’s sleep that night was interrupted by Austin whimpering and mumbling. She tiptoed over to his bunk. “Austin?”

“Why is nothing I do good enough for you?” Austin mumbled. 

Kayla sat on the edge of his bed. “What are you talking about?” She stroked his cheek gently. A vague expression of distress dominated his face. “When have I said something like that to you?”

“You act like I’m not good enough to be--yes, I know I’m the son of--I’m sorry, okay? It isn’t my fault!”

“Austin, what is going on?” Kayla asked, shaking his shoulder slightly. 

“I’m not a disappointment,” Austin whimpered. “I swear. I’m not a disappointment. I work so hard.”

Kayla shook him hard. “Austin, wake up!”

“I’m so sorry,” he whimpered. “I’m so, so, sorry. I worked so hard on that. I never wanted you to hate it. I’ll do better next time. I promise.”

“Wake up! Please!” She smacked his cheek. “Please!”

Austin hiccuped and whimpered. His eyes flew open and settled on Kayla’s face. “... Kay.”

“Yeah,” she whispered, gently stroking the cheek she’d previously slapped. “It’s me. Don’t cry. It’s okay.”

Austin sat up. “Kayla, I…”

Kayla took his hands. “Austin, you are  _ not  _ a disappointment to me.”

Austin’s face flickered through a thousand different emotions. Finally, he let his head fall against Kayla’s shoulder. Kayla felt tears fall against her skin. She gently wrapped her arms around him and held him close. “You do  _ not  _ disappoint me. You could  _ never  _ be not good enough. Who even put those thoughts in your head? It wasn’t me, that’s for sure.”

Austin balled his fists in Kayla’s tank top. “I don’t want to talk about it.”

Kayla rubbed his back in a comforting manner. “That’s okay,” she murmured. 

“My life is fine,” Austin muttered. “I’ve got no complaints. I’ve had it so much better than you and Will. My mom didn’t die until I was already at camp. I wasn’t abandoned. I didn’t have to move in with any friends. I didn’t go through Manhattan. I didn’t watch… I didn’t watch any of my siblings die in front of me. I’m  _ fine.  _ I swear, I’m  _ fine.” _

Kayla rubbed the small of Austin’s back with a gentle hand. “It’s okay to have had bad stuff happen to you. It doesn’t matter if it’s not as bad as stuff that happened to me. You’re allowed to be sad.” 

Austin only nodded. 

Kayla took a breath. “... Was it your mother?”

“What… what do you mean?” Austin said in a hoarse, sleepy voice. 

“Was it your mom who told you you weren’t good enough? A teacher? Other kids? I’ve heard sometimes other kids can be real mean to kids like us.”

Austin was silent for a long time. Finally, he sighed out and murmured, “... I was never good enough for my mother. She was a teacher, taught music theory. Brilliant woman. She taught me so much, but she never… I can’t remember her ever giving me a compliment on my music. Ever. I mean, she loved me, said she loved me at least, took care of me, but never complimented me. Even when I would win awards in school for it. Even when I won contests meant for junior musicians. I started the music channel thinking I sucked. I didn’t have any idea I was actually a good musician until my songs started getting views into the millions. I was just doing it because I liked to do it.” Austin took a breath. “She’s given me one compliment in my entire life and it was when I was eight years old and read my first chapter book. I still remember that.”

Kayla pulled away just enough to put a kiss on Austin’s cheek. “I think you’re an incredible musician, Austin. And I’m sure deep down she felt the same. Even by astronomical standards, you’re something special. Don’t worry at all about your musical prowess. You’re very good.”

Austin sighed. Kayla felt him melt against her. Kayla rubbed his back for another moment. “Do you want me to sleep in your bed tonight?”

Austin shrugged. “You don’t have to.”

“Okay,” Kayla murmured. She gently let go of Austin and he lay down, curling up, pulling the blankets around himself. She kissed his cheek again. “Sleep well.”

“G’night,” he mumbled. “Love you.”

“Love you too,” Kayla whispered, climbing back up to her bunk. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Idk how good this chapter actually was. Next one maybe will be a little better. I may just skip real quick through the next day so I can get to Kayla's birthday next chapter. We'll see. I'm a tad short on ideas rn but we'll see.


	16. Are You Okay?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cecil has a bad day. Kayla has a bad day. Nico has a bad day. Will helps everyone, because he's a sweetie. There's some Loucil in this one, because that's unironically one of my favorite m/f ships along with Percabeth, Tysella, Frazel, Shermiranda, Chrisse, Charlena, Sally/Paul... okay, I don't have a favorite. I like a lot of ships.
> 
> CHAPTER EDITED 2/25/21-- slightly changed a scene to accommodate Julia's character better

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings for Cecil having a PTSD episode and swinging an axe around, discussion of death, Julia calls Will a pretty boy.

Kayla woke up to someone’s hand bumping against her cheek and a muttered swear.

She opened her eyes. Julia was sitting over her. “What are you doing in my bed?”

“Oops,” Julia whispered. “Forget you saw me.” She jumped away and Kayla heard the window creak in the bathroom. 

_Crazy,_ Kayla thought, rolling over to go back to sleep. _So fucking crazy._

She’d barely started to drift off when the horn blew. She groaned into her pillow, feeling around in her bunk for whatever the hell Julia left. Her fingers fell on a small box, smaller than the others. She sat up, blinking her tired eyes until she could see straight, and opened it. 

It was a small dreamcatcher. 

There was a note, same as all the other times. _Idk about this one but after seeing yu flail in your sleep I thot it would be a nice thing to give you._

_\--Juuuuules_

Kayla touched it. It had some small feathers hanging down. _Did she make this herself? If she did, it’s really good._

There was a small piece of putty attached to a hook in the box. Kayla hung the dreamcatcher over her bed. _Hey, can’t hurt._

She climbed down from her bunk. Will had one leg out of his bunk and was groaning loudly into his pillow. Austin stumbled out of the bathroom, pulling on his shirt and jacket. His eyes were half-open. “Kay.”

“Austin,” Kayla nodded. She slipped in, showering quickly before dressing, grabbing her bow and quiver and stepping out of the cabin. She immediately noticed that the Hermes cabin door was open. There was yelling echoing out of the door.

“GetoffmegetoffmeGETOFFME!” The screams were beyond hysterical. Kayla’s heart twisted. She blinked back the memories of Michael’s last scream and approached.

“I’m not going fucking _anywhere!”_ Julia’s voice was sharp. “Calm your shit and put your axe down! There aren’t any fucking trees here and no one’s trying to kill you!”

Kayla poked her head in the door. Julia was kneeling on Cecil’s arms. Cecil was holding his axe. Julia had him pinned at the biceps, so his arms were flailing randomly and his axe couldn’t connect. Alice was holding his legs, her glasses fogging from the tears that streamed down her cheeks. 

“What’s happening in here?” Kayla asked. 

The look of relief that came over Julia’s face when her eyes met Kayla’s was beyond intense. “Get Lou Ellen or Will or somebody!”

Kayla took a sharp breath. She bolted from the cabin, running back to her own. She burst through the door, violently shaking Will where he still lay in bed. “Something’s wrong with Cecil!”

Will gasped, shooting up. “Gods!” His chest heaved as the adrenaline set in. He burst from the cabin in his tank top and pajama pants with little Death Stars on them. _Our hero,_ Kayla thought, chasing him out the door. She ran across the cabin main to Cabin 20 and slammed on the door. 

Lou Ellen opened it. “Fuck’s going on?”

“Cecil’s having an emergency!”

Shock and fear crossed over Lou Ellen’s face. “Hold on.” She ducked into her cabin and came out a moment later, running for the Hermes cabin without another word. Kayla followed on her heels and they burst in to see Will holding Cecil in a bear hug. Cecil’s axe was on the ground. Cecil was half-sobbing half-screaming into Will’s collarbone. Julia had led Alice to another bed. Alice was still crying. Kayla sat down, putting her arm around Alice.

Lou Ellen sat down by Will, a helpless expression on her face. She carefully put her hand on Cecil’s heaving back, rubbing careful circles on the bare skin. Cecil hiccuped hard, flinching at the touch before relaxing slightly. He squirmed around in Will’s arms, reaching for Lou Ellen with all the desperation of a frightened child. Lou Ellen took his hand and held it close. 

“Keep the trees away,” Cecil begged. 

“I will,” Lou replied instantly. “I won’t let trees nor those who live among them bring you to harm.”

Cecil’s head fell forwards in Will’s hold. Will let him go enough for him to slump against Lou Ellen, sending them both falling to the bed. Lou Ellen yelped as her head hit the wall. Will passed Cecil’s pillow and Lou Ellen put it behind her, rubbing her head as Cecil nestled into her neck. Will rubbed both of their legs, as gently as he could. 

He looked over at Kayla, Alice and Julia. “I’m so, so sorry, Julia, Alice. You should never have had to see that. Julia, what you did was incredibly brave. I don’t know if I would have been able to pin my hollering older brother if he had started thrashing an axe at me.”

Julia shrugged. “I couldn’t have done it if he’d been able to get to his feet. It was easy because he was in bed. I jumped on his chest and the fucker didn’t stand a chance.”

“Still impressive,” Will replied.

“Yeah. He may have gotten away with flailing weapons around under Travis and Connor, but he won’t with me. I’m not strict but I won’t tolerate accidental homicide.”

“Smartest thing I’ve ever heard you say,” Will replied.

“Yeah, yeah, whatever, prettyboy. I don’t care.”

Will snorted and shook his head. He resumed rubbing circles on Lou and Cecil’s intertwined legs. 

Kayla watched Lou Ellen hold Cecil and felt a little twinge in her chest. She looked at the floor, blinking back the tears that welled in her eyes. 

Julia huffed. “Alice, Kay, let’s get out of here. No sense in sitting here while Markowitz cries himself out.” She stood up. 

“But your hair--” Alice sniffled.

“Fuck my hair! I can brush and braid it after breakfast, we’re fine.” She grabbed Kayla and Alice’s hands and helped them up. She led them quickly from the Hermes cabin, not even bothering to put on her shoes before she left. They wound up on the amphitheatre steps, Alice still sniffling and pressed up against Julia. 

Julia did not let go of Kayla’s hand. 

It was a while before Kayla spoke. “... Your hair is pretty like this,” she murmured.

“Sure it is,” Julia grumbled sarcastically. “Looks like shit.”

“Can I brush it?”

“You actually have a comb on you?”

“No, but I can do it with my fingers,” Kayla offered. “I’ve got a lot of practice with that.”

Julia shrugged. “... Fine.”

Kayla moved her hand from the warmth and softness of Julia’s, sitting up a little and moving up a step to sit with her knees on either side of Julia’s body. When she put her fingers in Julia’s-- _really_ silky--locks, she noticed that Julia’s ears were as red as her hair. Kayla knew better than to acknowledge it. 

“So… why did you want to come out here?” Kayla asked, gently pulling her fingers through Julia’s hair. 

Julia snorted. “Because as long as Markowitz was crying Alice was gonna cry too, and I owe it to her not to leave her in that situation. Also because as long as Lou Ellen was holding on to Cecil you were gonna look at them with those big sad fucking eyes and that fucking _kills_ me.”

Kayla’s hands stilled. Her face warmed. “... Thanks, I guess.”

Julia snorted. “No problem.”

Kayla resumed pulling the tangles from Julia’s hair. _She really does care! I can’t believe it, she really does care! I… I don’t know how I didn’t realize it before. Also, her hair is so soft. It’s really beautiful and silky, and such a bright color. I can smell it, too, it’s so sweet, and her scalp is so warm, if a little sweaty. I didn’t even know how cold my hands were until I got them tangled in her hair._

“You feeling better?” Julia asked, turning to Alice.

Alice nodded. “I’m… I’m sorry,” she sighed. “It’s just… it really… hurts to see him like that.”

Julia sighed. “We did what we could. Don’t cry about it.”

Alice wiped her eyes. “... Yeah. I guess you’re right. I just… I just don’t want him to be hurt, you know?”

“Yeah, I don’t either. That’s why I had Kayla get Will and… uh… you know.”

“You can say her name in front of me, you know,” Kayla muttered. “I’m not that heartbroken anymore.”

Julia leaned her head back. “You sure? That’s not what your face said when you were back in that cabin.”

“Seeing her snuggling up to Cecil is different than hearing her name,” Kayla grumbled. 

Julia sighed. “Okay. Do what you need to do.”

They fell into silence. Kayla finished finger-combing her hair, flattening it as best she could against her head. The breakfast horn blew and Kayla jumped, clenching her fist around Julia’s hair. Julia yelped.

“Sorry!” Kayla insisted desperately. 

Julia pulled her hair free. “Yeah, no problem.” She stood up. “Let’s go to breakfast. Alice, come on.”

Alice and Kayla trailed Julia to the breakfast pavilion. Will, Nico, Cecil, Lou Ellen and Austin were already there. Will had one arm around Cecil and the other around Nico. Cecil’s eyes were red and half-closed. The three girls grabbed their breakfast and sat down with the rest of the group. 

“I’m sorry,” Cecil blurted. “I’m really, really sorry.”

Julia took an oversized bite of her toast. “Don’ worry about it.”

Nico lay down in Will’s lap. He closed his eyes. 

Will stroked his hair. “Did you not sleep well last night?”

Nico grumbled. “I just gave you a free hand to eat with. That’s all.”

Will rolled his eyes. He took a few bites of his banana. “Right, sure. Why the hell didn’t you come over?”

Nico glared up at Will. “Have you considered that I might not need to come scampering to you for comfort every time I get mildly upset?”

Will glared back down at Nico. “Have you considered that I might _want_ you to come scampering to me for comfort every time you get mildly upset?”

Nico reached up and tweaked Will’s nose. “Have you considered that you suck?”

Will stuck out his tongue. “No, you.”

“No, you,” Nico repeated in a mocking tone.

Will scowled at him. Before he could reply, Cecil muttered, “Guys, can you stop? You’re making my head hurt.”

“Okay, okay,” Will whispered. “Here, have some water.” He put the mouth of a water bottle to Cecil’s lips. “Drink this. It’ll help.”

Cecil drank up. He closed his eyes, leaning on Will’s shoulder.

“How about I take you to the infirmary after breakfast and you can lie down for a little while?” Will suggested.

“I’m not leaving him,” Lou Ellen replied flatly. “I’m not. Not now.”

Will gave her a gentle smile. “No one’s making you. I just think Cecil should lie down for a couple of hours. You can stay with him if you want, I honestly think it would help, but I want him to relax and feel better.”

Lou Ellen nodded. “You’d better let me stay with him.”

Kayla stared at her cereal. She wanted to disappear through the ground. Her heart twisted into a tight little ball. Apparently she hadn’t gotten over it as much as she thought she had. 

Julia huffed. She jabbed Kayla with her finger, then turned to Alice. “Hey, what kinda dudes you like?”

Alice started from where she’d been tucked quietly into her food. “Uh… I guess… I mean, just guys who are nice to me… and like me… you know?”

“Would you date a musician?” Julia asked. She leaned over to Kayla and whispered, “Ask him if he’d date a girl who spoke really good Japanese, or a girl who’s obsessed with _Animal Crossing,_ or Hermes kids, or something.”

Alice shrugged. “... Maybe.”

Kayla turned to Austin. “Hey… uh… are you into women?”

Austin shrugged. “Yeah, why?”

“Uh… would you date a Hermes kid?”

Austin raised his eyebrow. “Did Julia only pretend to like you to get at me? Is that why you’re down?”

“No,” Kayla replied. 

“So… Alice. You want to know if I like Alice.”

Kayla stayed silent. She looked over at Julia with a helpless expression.

Julia only rolled her eyes. “Okay, okay, fine. Since Kayla blew it, yes, Austin, we were trying to see if you and Alice were into each other.”

Austin looked at Alice. Alice shyly looked back at him, focusing more on the shiny buttons on his jacket than his face. Austin cleared his throat and shifted. “Um. I’m… not… I’m married to my music, man, I’m not… I’m not looking for more.”

Alice gave a sigh of relief. “Okay, good. I don’t know what Jules and Kay were planning, but they never let me on it, either,” she laughed.

Austin snorted. “That’s two of us.” He shook his head. “Anyway, yeah, Kayla, thanks for the consideration, but I don’t need you to set me up. I’m fine where I am, thanks.”

Kayla sighed. “No problem, man.” She looked up from her cereal. Cecil had moved so he was leaning on Lou Ellen’s shoulder. Lou Ellen had her arm around him. Kayla’s eyes stung a little. _I’m over it. I swear, I’m over it. I got over it days ago._

Julia leaned in and whispered, “you good?”

“Yeah,” she whispered back. “Just… kinda hurts to see Lou Ellen all over Cecil.”

Julia pursed her lips, thinking. Then she gently ruffled Kayla’s hair. “Sorry.”

Will grinned and gave them a thumbs-up. 

Kayla’s face turned a deep crimson. “Will!”

Will chuckled. “Sorry, sorry.”

“We’re fine,” Kayla huffed.

Julia pulled her arm away. She sighed.

Kayla could see the embarrassment in her eyes. “I’m sorry.”

“Nah, it’s good.” Julia shifted and took a few bites of her breakfast before leaning back close to Kayla. “You’re doing really well with this, by the way.”

Kayla snorted. “Oh, I cried enough for two weeks the day it happened. I didn’t do anything else but cry. Also, after you go through enough terrible shit, you get kinda hard to simple stuff like heartbreak, you know?”

Julia nodded. “Yeah, I get it.” 

There was a pause. Kayla tucked back into her cereal, which was well on its way to being soggy. She ate quickly and left the pavilion. She was done watching Lou and Cecil cuddle. It still stung just a little.

  
  
  


She was practicing archery and enjoying the cool fall air when someone poked her shoulder.

She turned. Nico was standing behind her, his hands in his pockets. He shifted his feet, dust stirring around them. “Hey… can we talk?”

Kayla studied him. “This? From _our_ Nico di Angelo? Since when do you talk about things?”

Nico bit back a smile. “Yeah, well… I think there’s something we need to talk about.”

Kayla put her quiver back on her back and slung her bow over her shoulder. “You wanna walk?”

Nico nodded and beckoned her away from the archery range.

“Okay, but not for long,” Kayla warned. “I’ve got Malcolm coming in in forty-five, and he doesn’t like being kept waiting.”

“This won’t take that long,” Nico reassured. He led her down in the direction of the canoe lake, then down a deerpath through a small thicket of trees to a little rocky outcrop. He climbed onto a rock and sat down, patting the rock beside him. “Here. Sit.”

Kayla perched next to him. “What is this place?”

“Will brings me here sometimes,” Nico shrugged. “When we want to cuddle or something.”

“Ah,” Kayla replied. “So, what did you want to talk to me about?”  
Nico took a deep breath. He stared down at the water as it lapped softly on the rock they sat on. Finally, he said, in a deeply vulnerable voice, “are you okay?”

Kayla cocked her head. “In what way?”

“Lou Ellen,” Nico said. “You looked so morose at breakfast today, I just…” He shook his head. “Are you okay?”

Kayla swallowed. “I… I did all my crying the first day. I’m okay now. Really.”

Nico sighed. “Yeah. I guess I’m just… projecting. I’m sorry.”

Kayla wanted to reach for Nico, but his head was turned and he just looked so _distant_ that Kayla wasn’t sure she could close the gap. “Do _you_ need to talk?”  
Nico was quiet and stiff for a long time. Finally, he deflated, his shoulders slumping as a breath escaped his lips. “I’m sorry. I… I had a thing for Percy Jackson. For a long time. And I had a lot of… a lot of heartbreak and guilt and shame for it that I couldn’t get over for a really long time. So yeah, I’m projecting.” He paused. “... I’m sorry.”

“I’m sorry,” she whispered. “That’s… I’m sorry. Did anyone know?”

Nico’s lips flattened into a line. “... Jason. Jason knew.” His voice broke.

Kayla realized suddenly why Will was so protective of him. He looked so vulnerable it broke her heart. “What can I do?”

Nico took a deep breath. “I’m… I’m okay. I’m okay. Are you okay? I can be okay if you’re okay.”

“I’ll be okay,” Kayla murmured comfortingly. “It hurts now, but I’ve been hurt before. I’ve lost people before, in a way that goes beyond a simple ‘I’m not into women like that’. I’ve buried sixteen of my brothers and sisters. I’ll be fine.”

Nico visibly flinched at that. “Sixteen?”

“Throughout the course of my life, yes. Eleven of those were throughout the Labyrinth and Manhattan. Five before.”

Nico had gone white as a ghost. He reached out, his hands trembling, and Kayla took his hands in her own, rubbing the knuckles. Nico squeezed her hands with an alarming amount of force. His eyes were tightly closed. Kayla touched her forehead to his. “Hey… it’s okay,” she murmured. “I’m okay. I’ll be okay.”

“That’s not okay,” Nico whispered. “Sixteen isn’t okay.”

Kayla was silent for a second. Nico’s hands shook slightly around hers. Finally, Nico pulled away, shaking his head. “There’s nothing I can say to that, Kayla. Nothing that could help.”

“You’re right,” Kayla shrugged. “But it’s not your job to help. And for the most part, I’m fine. I really am.”

Nico continued holding her hand. “You’re really, really strong, Kay.”

Kayla didn’t know how to respond to that, so she just stayed quiet. 

Nico stared at the water for a few minutes before he whispered, “If you’re ever… not okay, would you… you know… I know I’m not… not an easy person to talk to, but… will you… come to me? I really want to help, you know, because I’ve been through… been through it too, and… and…”

Kayla put an arm around his shoulder. “‘Course, Nico. You don’t need to be so awkward about it. Here, would you like to give me a hug? Would that help you?”

Nico grabbed her and held her close. He whimpered softly as she reciprocated, holding her just a little tighter. Nico was cool to the touch, and Kayla could feel his ribs through his sweatshirt. His hair smelled nice, earthy, but Kayla couldn’t quite place what exactly it was. It was down to his shoulders, and it tickled Kayla’s face as she buried her face in his neck. Nico’s breath quivered in his lungs, and Kayla rubbed his back, trying to soothe him. 

Finally, Nico pulled away. His eyes were shiny with tears. 

“Let’s go see Will,” Kayla murmured. “I think you need him.”

“But… she’ll be there,” Nico murmured. “And Cecil.”

Kayla thought of Lou and Cecil snuggling and felt a twinge in her chest. “I’ll manage.”

“But you don’t _have_ to ‘manage’!” Nico blurted. “You can have a better life than that! You _deserve_ a better life than that!” 

Kayla felt her eyes sting. “Thanks, I… thanks. But I still think at least _you_ should go see Will. I’d like to do it too, still, because Will is my brother. But at least you should be there.”

Nico swallowed. He searched Kayla up and down. “Okay,” he murmured. “You’re a stronger person than I, then.”

Kayla shrugged. “I’ve always been really good at compartmentalizing.”

They walked back to the Big House, crossing into the infirmary in silence. Will was working at his desk in the corner. Kayla put her head on his shoulder, wrapping her arms around his waist. “Sup.”

Will jumped. “Oh, gods!” He turned. “You scared the shit out of me, Kay.”

Kayla kissed his cheek. “I’m sorry,” she murmured. “You know I’d never hurt you.”

Will relaxed into her touch. “Yeah, I do. I just… you know.”

“How’s…?” Nico’s voice chimed in quietly.

Will spun in his chair. Kayla let him. He smiled broadly. “Hey, Neeks.” He patted his thighs. Nico sat down on his lap and Will wrapped him in a gentle hug. “How are you?”

Nico nuzzled in a little. Will stroked his hair. “Really? That bad?”

Nico nodded. “Mhm.”

“What can I do to help?”

Nico took a deep breath and sighed. “I just… needed this hug. That’s all.”

Will kissed the crown of his head. “Then I’m happy to provide.”

Kayla sat down on the side of the nearest cot. “You know, I want what you two have.”

Will turned his head. “What do you mean?”  
“I want someone to hug me like that.”

“Would you like a hug?” Will asked softly.

“You’ve got Nico right now. I can hug you later,” Kayla insisted. “Also, I honestly want someone to hug me like that… romantically, you know?”

“Because you’re basically a teenager now, and you’re starting to want different things, and that’s normal, and--”

Kayla held up one hand. “I know what puberty is, Will.”

Nico was clearly stifling laughter into Will’s turtleneck. Will only smiled. “Of course, Kay.”

Kayla rolled her eyes and chuckled. The door burst open. Julia and Alice exploded into the room. “How’s Cecil?” blurted Alice.

Will gave a small smile. “He’s better. He’s resting now. He’s in the third private room from the left, if you want to see him.”

“Thanks,” Alice nodded. She ran to the room and slipped in. Julia’s eyes lingered on Kayla for a moment or two before she followed Alice. 

Kayla was too curious. Besides, Cecil had been nothing but kind to her. She stood up and followed them, peeking into the room Cecil was in. Lou Ellen was spooning a sleeping Cecil, her face buried in his neck. Alice was sitting by Cecil’s side, petting his hair. Julia, who hadn’t sat down yet, turned and spotted Kayla. Her eyes widened. She waved her hand in a silent _shoo._

Kayla turned and walked back to Will. “... Hey, about that hug…”

Will rolled his eyes. “Come here.”

Kayla sat down on Will’s knee, leaning against his chest. Nico looped his arms around her as well and she melted into the group hug. Will’s heartbeat was calm. He held both of them easily. The sting in Kayla’s chest eased slightly at Will’s protective embrace. She closed her eyes. 

“You’re a good person,” Nico murmured. “There’s someone out there for you. I promise. I mean, I found love. If someone loves me, then someone will definitely love you.”

Kayla nodded. “... I hope so.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this one took so long, lol. And I'm sorry for not getting to Kayla's birthday in this one. If it doesn't happen in the next chapter, it'll be the one after that. 
> 
> Anyway, this is getting a little bit more recognition, so I'm stoked for that. I hope you all are enjoying this so far. I know I'm enjoying writing it.


	17. On Love

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kayla walks in on Will and Nico having a soft moment, no Julia in this one but she's mentioned. Will talks to Kayla about love and it gets kinda deep but not really

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Brief mention of Will being "touched wrong," not descriptive at all though. Short chapter because it's valentine's and I love you guys

The rest of the day passed quietly. 

Kayla barely made it to her appointment with Malcolm, who was visibly annoyed but too polite to call her out on it. Nico had showed up shortly after the session, asking her to help him learn to shoot. He sucked at it. He really did. He hit the target maybe once during the entire session, even with Kayla’s direct guidance. Despite his abysmal failure, he was in high spirits, or as high as Nico’s spirits ever were. 

She’d spent some time with Chiron, Valentina and Clovis in a history lesson. Chiron had gotten on her about neglecting her more conventional studies--she hadn’t attended anything in nearly a week--and said that eventually, even if she won Olympic gold as many times as possible, she’d need some level of conventional education and a back-up plan. Privately, she’d decided to become a singer once her body began to wane. She’d been told her whole life she sang like an angel. But she knew Chiron wouldn’t buy that, so she attended as few as she could get away with.

She stayed out for a half hour or so after campfire. She knew everyone else had gone in. She knew she was cutting it close. But she didn’t care. She just wanted to shoot a little bit on her own, no Nico, no Malcolm, no anybody. She liked Nico. She really did. But sometimes she needed to be alone. 

She returned to the cabin seconds before curfew. Austin was nowhere to be seen, but she could hear the shower running, so she assumed that was where he was. Will had Nico wrapped in his blanket--both his camp-issued quilt and his old, worn childhood blanket--and was cradling him in his arms, trying to feed him a Kit Kat from his medpack. 

“Hey, guys,” Kayla greeted, biting back a smile. She quickly climbed up to her bunk, put her bow on its hook, and returned to where Will and Nico were.

“Kay,” Will greeted. 

“Make him stop,” Nico griped. “He’s gonna make me fat.”

“Nico, you’re like thirty pounds underweight or more,” Kayla replied softly. “I think you can afford to eat a little candy.” 

Nico pouted. “I know. But it makes my stomach hurt if I eat too much.”

“This is your first piece,” Will sighed. “Does one piece of candy make your stomach hurt?”

“... No,” Nico murmured. 

“Then here.” Will touched Nico’s lip. “You should have this.”

Nico grumbled. He accepted the Kit-Kat into his mouth. Will let his fingers brush Nico’s lips as he put the Kit-Kat in. Nico leaned his head against Will’s chest as he slowly chewed. Will buried his face in Nico’s overlong hair. 

Kayla leaned in. “May I?”

Nico opened his eyes a little bit, studied her and nodded. 

Kayla leaned in and touched Nico’s hair, holding it in her hand. “Dude, this is longer than mine.”

Nico sighed. “I think I look better shaggy. Also, it makes me feel better to see it longer and thicker because…” he swallowed, “it was really thin and nasty and matted for a while and seeing it down to my shoulders and sort of thick and shiny is… it helps.”

“It’s because you’re more properly nourished now,” Will cut in. “But I’m glad it helps. I think it’s pretty, too.”

Nico gave a small smile.

“It’s gonna get in your face,” Kayla warned. “My hair used to be all down my back. I know what I’m talking about.”

Nico shrugged. “I can tie it back or something. I’m fine.”

“You’d look pretty with a ponytail,” Will murmured into Nico’s hair. 

Nico’s smile got a little bigger.

Kayla gave a small sigh. “I wish I had what you and Nico have, Will. I want someone to feed me chocolate and call me pretty.”

“You’ve said that a few times,” Will said. “You’re really into that idea of falling in love, aren’t you?”  
Kayla shrugged. “I guess.”

Will sighed. “Well, it is hard work. It’s not just about picking up someone you think is pretty and getting kisses and hugs and touches and cuddles. It’s about being there for someone when they’re sad. It’s about supporting them when they need it. It’s about knowing what they like, what they need. Properly loving someone is hard. Make sure if you want that, you do it with someone who’s worth it.” He kissed the crown of Nico’s head. “If you want hugs and cuddles and chocolate, Austin or I will give it to you. You don’t need to rush into something because you want attention.”

Kayla nodded. “I guess so.”

“Also, I think it’ll be good for you to drop the thing on Lou Ellen. Even if she were into you, she’s more than four years your senior  _ and  _ she’s, in all honesty, not very stable. Not to mention the fact that she got you into a whole host of self-destructive behavior that nearly killed you before any of us found out about it. Lou Ellen is a good person, and underneath all the hardness she puts up as self-defense, she’s actually very sweet. But she isn’t right for you. I’m sorry.”

Kayla looked down, twisting a corner of the sheet around her finger.. “... I’m trying to get over her, I swear.”

Will stroked his hand over her head. “Hey, it’s okay. I don’t expect it overnight. I just… you’ve been hurt way too badly for a twelve-year-old. I don’t want you to be hurt any worse than you have been. By the way, on a slightly different topic, have you seen Julia today?”

“Not since earlier in the infirmary,” Kayla sighed. “And she shooed me away when I peeked into Cecil’s private room.”

Will raised an eyebrow. “Hmm. Do you think she knows about your crush on…?”

“Yeah, she knows,” Kayla assured. “I don’t know how she knows but she knows.”

“Cecil might have told her,” Nico replied. “I mean, I told Cecil and Will, so…”

“Okay, so she knows,” Kayla chuckled. 

Will’s face turned to a soft and gentle smile. “Kayla, she was trying to protect you.”

“She was?” 

“Yes!” Will insisted. “Kayla, that’s  _ beautiful!  _ Protection is a beautiful thing to offer someone. I know it was the best gift anyone ever gave me.” 

“I’m with Will,” Nico cut in. “Two people protecting each other… yeah.”

Kayla thought. A warmth spread behind her sternum. “... I guess it is beautiful.” She took a deep breath. “I guess I just… I’m used to protecting myself, you know?”

“I get it,” Will murmured. “But sometimes it’s worth it to have someone to love and protect you. It doesn’t mean you’re unable to protect yourself. It means that you’re able to trust enough to let someone protect you.”

Kayla leaned against him. “Yeah, I guess so.” 

Will put his arm around her, snuggling her against his chest. His warmth flowed into her side. She could feel the vibration of his heartbeat against her cheek. He smelled nice, like linen. Kayla took Nico’s hand and he squeezed it gently. They sank into a comfortable silence.

  
  
  


Kayla didn’t know when she’d fallen asleep. 

She woke up to Will sniffling and whimpering quietly. She slipped down from her bed and tiptoed over to his. He was clutching his little striped blanket, pressing his face into his pillow. Kayla sat next to him. “Will?”

Will peeked one streaming cerulean eye up from his pillow. “... Kay,” he gasped.

Kayla reached out and stroked Will’s hair. “Cuddle?”

Will closed his eyes and nodded. 

Kayla gently curled up and let Will curl her in his arms, crying into her neck. She stroked his fingers where they curled on her belly. “What was it about this time?”

Will only shook his head.

“Talking about it might help,” Kayla whispered. 

Will shook his head again. “I don’t want to… I don’t want to make you hear about it.”

Kayla’s heart sank.  _ What did he go through that he won’t tell me about?  _ “... Okay… well… if you want to talk, I’m here, okay? And I love you, okay?”

Will sniffled and took a shuddering breath. “... I… I was hurt. By… by Lou Ellen’s father. And that’s why she’s been having difficulties lately. I don’t want to say more than that.”

Kayla took one of Will’s hands and pulled it to her own chest.  _ He was touched wrong. I bet he was touched wrong. Oh, my poor Will.  _ “Okay. I won’t press.”

Will let out a quiet sigh, warm against her neck. “... Thank you.”

Kayla kissed his fingers. “No problem.”

They sank into silence. Kayla felt Will’s eyelashes brush against her neck as they closed, his tears trickling slowly to a stop. His breaths slowed and softened, and gradually, she felt him fall asleep.

Kayla lay awake for a very, very long time.


	18. Your Secret's Safe With Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Julia and Kayla talk, then Will and Kayla talk, then Julia and Kayla and Austin and Alice hang out in arts and crafts and Alice can draw really well.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mentions of child molestation. Also, posting on no sleep at 5 AM! Stayed up all night writing this! Woo!

She was only barely drifting off when she heard Julia break into their cabin through the bathroom window. The window creaked, a few thumps, the bunk creaked, a soft breath echoed throughout the cabin, a few more thumps and the window creaked again and there was no more sound. 

She’d drifted off in full by the time Will stirred at her back, kissing her cheek and sitting up, wrapping her in the blanket and sneaking off to the shower. Kayla woke after the bed shifted beneath her. She watched Will retreat, then glanced up at her bunk.  _ I wonder what she left me today. _

Kayla groaned softly, then crawled out of Will’s bed and back to her own, which was downright freezing compared to the soft heat of Will’s bed. There was another box on her pillow, a small one this time. She opened it up. It was one of those caramel apples, one with vanilla and chocolate chips on it. 

_ Austin said yu liked these. I hope I did well--sum people hate nilla chips. 2morro’s present will be better so watch out! _

_ -Juuuuules _

Kayla gave a small laugh. She did like caramel apples. Chiron had given her one on her birthday every year when she was a little kid. She didn’t know that Austin knew, though. She didn’t think she’d ever told him about the candy apples. Although frankly, she told him lots of things. It wouldn’t have surprised her if she had. 

She made a mental note to eat it after breakfast.

She washed up, put on real clothes and left the cabin. She noticed Cecil lounging on the front step of the Hermes cabin, in pajama pants and a wife-beater type of shirt. The same weird sigils that she’d seen a few days back were still scrawled over the parts of his neck, shoulders and chest that she could see. 

“‘Sup,” Cecil nodded as she approached. 

“Hey,” Kayla started. She sprawled in the grass in front of him. “You good?”

Cecil looked down. His cheeks colored. “Yeah, I’m good. I’m… listen, Kay, I’m really fucking sorry you had to see me like that yesterday.”

Kayla shrugged. “It’s not a problem, dude. I don’t care.”

Cecil sighed. “Yeah, but I still feel bad.” He lounged back on the step. 

Kayla scanned over the sigils on his skin. Barbed wire around his neck, little “x”s with a line through them. A jar on his left pectoral, a sort of swirl on his right. And something with ears on his chest, she couldn’t tell what it was. “... Hey, what are these?”

Cecil laughed awkwardly. “Yeah, don’t worry about that. They’re something Lou and I were trying to pull. No big.”

Kayla pursed her lips. “... Is this something… fatal? Or potentially fatal?”

Cecil thought. “Well, it doesn’t even take effect until after I die. So… not fatal. We’re good.”

Kayla shook her head, looking down. “You’re a piece of work, Cecil.”

Cecil smirked. “I’m aware of that.” He gave a small, sheepish laugh. “I’m just glad you don’t hate me.”

Kayla cocked her head. “Why would I hate you?”

“You know.” Cecil fiddled with the string of his pajama pants. “Lou Ellen.”

Kayla sighed. “Oh, yeah.” She shook her head. “No, it’s… I can’t blame you for… being in love with her? I’m not misinterpreting that, am I?”

Cecil shook his head. “No. I’ve… I’ve thought she was hot ever since I was ten or eleven.”

“Okay. I can’t blame you for being in love with her.” Kayla took a deep breath. She shook her head. “I mean, it hurts, I guess, but it’s not your fault.”

Cecil cocked his head slightly, a small frown decorating his lips. “You okay? You need… is there anything I can do?”

Kayla smiled. “Get your sister?”

Cecil raised his eyebrows. “Ooh, spicy. Yeah, I’ll get Julia.” He stood up and stretched, revealing more barbed-wire type inscriptions around his stomach, and reentered the cabin. He came out a moment later and said, “She’s in the shower, would you like to come in?”

Kayla nodded, clambering to her feet and walking inside. “I don’t think I’ve ever been in the Hermes cabin.” She looked around. It looked beyond average, some bunks, a plain altar, a wooden floor with odd dents and nicks. “Weird. I expected to see…”

“Sleeping bags on the floor? Yeah, that’s old news, fortunately. At least during the school year, we don’t have those anymore,” Cecil laughed. 

“Hey, Kayla,” came a small voice from one of the bunks.

Kayla looked over. Alice was lying in what Kayla assumed was her bunk, her blanket over her. She wasn’t wearing her glasses. 

“You are Kayla, right?” Alice continued. “Not some other girl with green hair?”

Kayla grinned. “Yeah, it’s me.” She leaned in close to Alice, close enough to smell her morning breath. “Can you see me now?”

Alice giggled. “Yeah.”

Cecil yawned. “Have fun, girls. I’m goin’ out to get some sun on my skin and smell the air. It smells really nice.”

Kayla straightened. “... Have fun with that.”

“Will do.” Cecil slipped out the door. 

“Sorry about him,” Alice mumbled into her pillow. “He’s weird.”

Kayla chuckled. “Aw, don’t be like that. He’s charming. May I sit on your bed?”

Alice shrugged. “Sure.”

Kayla sat. They fell into silence. In the quiet, Kayla heard someone singing in a rough, strong voice, kind of sweet, kind of scratchy. 

_ And I still see it with my eyes _

_ This dream that haunts my every night _

_ Showing reality, where the two of us, could never be _

_ If we choose like so _

_ There is no turning back I know _

_ But it’s okay because you’re the one who means _

_ More than the whole world to me _

Kayla stiffened. She knew that song. Lou Ellen had played it once or twice for her when they’d used to hang out all the time. She’d resonated with it because Lou Ellen said it was about a pair of doomed lesbian lovers, but she’d never bothered to find out what the name of the song was.

“Alice, what’s the name of the song Julia’s singing?”

Alice groaned loudly. “Ugh. Don’t worry about it. It’s some trashy Jpop song from ten years ago. She liked it, asked me to translate because I’m good with languages--Japanese especially--and I didn’t even bother. I used some other guy’s translation. Now she sings it all the time. It’s annoying. I even told her once, like, ‘I didn’t even translate that, I stole it from someone’ and she was still cool with it.”

“I think Lou Ellen showed me that version,” Kayla murmured. “I liked it, but I never knew the name of the song.”

“Cool,” Alice grumbled. 

They fell into silence.  _ I’ll just ask Julia once she gets out of the bathroom.  _

Julia came out of the bathroom a moment later, still humming. Kayla listened closely.  _ … Still I’ll choose like so, there is no turning back I know… _

“... But it’s okay because you’re the one who means more than the whole world to me,” Kayla finished softly. 

Julia jolted, her face turning a brilliant crimson, and whirled around. “How do you…?”  
“Lou Ellen showed me that song. Somewhat ironically, she liked it a lot,” Kayla laughed.

Julia grinned. “Yeah, that is… I’m assuming she’s into weeb music?”

“Yeah,” Kayla snorted. “Big time. At least for a while, anyway.”

Julia laughed. “I’m not into weeb music as much, but the song… yeah.” Her smile waned, but she caught it in time and grinned again. “Anyway, I didn’t expect your special, pretty Apollo ass to know that music. I thought you all were better than that. Only listened to classical or improv jazz or the Beatles or some shit.”

Kayla snorted. “Nah. I mean, Austin’s into improv jazz, but Will’s an alt-rock type and I just listen to whatever everyone else listens to. We’re less pretentious than you think. Anyway, what’s the name of that song?”

Julia thought. “‘Magnet’. I forget who did the english lyrics, but it  _ clearly  _ wasn’t my  _ dearly beloved  _ sister, Alice, who I asked to write me a set of translyrics.”

Alice shot out of bed. “Oh, for  _ fuck’s  _ sake!” She stormed from the cabin, still in her pajamas, and slammed the door behind her. 

Julia snorted. “Fucker.”

Kayla shifted. “Um…”

Julia turned to her. “What,” she said flatly. 

“I’m sorry.” Kayla cleared her throat. “For… for outing you a couple of days back. I just…  I’m sorry. I wasn’t thinking.”

Julia sighed, sitting down on the edge of the bed Kayla assumed was hers. “Kayla… look. I’m not upset that you told  _ Will and Austin.  _ I’m just concerned about who Will and Austin might tell.”

“Will actually got mad at me for telling him,” Kayla sighed. “He said it wasn’t right for me to tell him if you hadn’t said it was okay for me to do so. So I think your secret is safe with the Apollo cabin.”

Julia gave a small sigh. “That… does help, actually. You should have told me that before. I’m just… you guys can’t lie at all, right?”

Kayla bit her lip. “Well, we can, but we all have tells. Some are more obvious than others.”

“So what, someone asks you if I’m in love with you and you say no and then you just fucking… what? Piss your panties?”

Kayla snorted. “You’re disgusting. And no, none of us spontaneously piss ourselves.”

“What are you guys’s tells, then?”

Kayla bit her lip. “... Um… well, I slap myself.”

Julia laughed. “Really?”

Kayla’s face was hot. “Yeah.”

“Dude, lie about something! Show me!”

Kayla bit her lip. “... Uh… the sky is green.” Her hand automatically moved and smacked her hard across the face. It stung badly. Her eyes watered. 

Julia sucked her teeth. “Oh, that’s awful.” She gave a small chuckle. “Your face is getting red, too. Gods, I’m so fucking sorry for asking.”

Kayla managed a wan smile. “... Yeah.”

“Anyway… damn, that makes me even more concerned. Are Will and Austin’s tells this obvious?”

“No. I have the most obvious tell in the cabin. So… yeah.”

Julia gave a soft sigh. “... I’m fucked, aren’t I?”

Kayla looked down. “... I’m so sorry. As I said… accepting place, at least.”

Julia flopped down on her side, burying her face in the pillow. “Yeah, I know. If it weren’t, I’d have to change my name and move. Fuck’s sake. And you  _ know  _ that the Aphrodite kids are gonna catch on eventually. Gods.”

“... Are you nervous?” Kayla asked. 

Julia nodded into her pillow. 

“... I’m sorry,” Kayla murmured. “I’m sorry. I don’t know how to help this without just cutting you off and never talking to you again, which frankly, I don’t really… I don’t really want to do. I’m gonna be honest, I like… us. For whatever we are. And I don’t want to throw it away just because of what other people think, you know?”

Julia was quiet for a while. Kayla saw her ears go through a few different shades of pink. Finally, she nodded. “Yeah. I… I don’t know. Old habits die real fuckin’ hard, I guess.”

Kayla moved to the bed Julia was flopped on and sat next to her. “Yeah. I’m… I wish society weren’t doing this to you.”

“We do live in a society,” Julia grumbled mopily. She paused. “Fuck, now I’m being like Alice.”

“Alice is a nice person,” Kayla defended. “Anyway, what can I do? Is there any way I can help you?”

Julia gave a small sigh. “... No, I don’t think so. Just… keep it on the down-low, okay? Don’t spread this beyond our group of friends. Like, I know people are gonna wonder eventually, but I don’t want to give anyone the satisfaction of knowing they were right.”

Kayla chuckled. “Of course. I’ll keep quiet about it. I’m just glad you’re not mad at me. I was sure you were gonna go right back to bullying me when I told you I’d done that.”

“I mean, you said that if you hated me, it would be because I bullied you. And I want you to like me someday. So no, I… no.”

Kayla felt something warm blossom behind her sternum. “Thanks.” Her eyes wandered to the door. “Alice and Cecil have been gone a while. I wonder what they’re doing?”

“Spying on us,” Julia sighed. “Definitely. They probably think we’re kissing or something. So fucking obnoxious.”

Kayla laughed. “I dunno, I think it’s kind of funny.”

Julia just groaned. 

The breakfast horn blew then. “You wanna come to breakfast with me?” Kayla asked.

Julia seemed to think on it. “... Uh… sure, I guess so. No funny business, though.”

Kayla grinned. “Of course not.”

  
  
  


The grins when they arrived at breakfast together were positively shit-eating. 

Will gave them a thumbs-up. Austin gave an understanding smile. Alice made a kissy-face. Lou Ellen gave them a side-eye, as if she was trying to figure out exactly what was going on. Cecil lay back on his elbows, grinning broadly. “‘Sup?” 

“Nothing much,” Julia nodded. “Alice, 

Nico, bless him, went on eating like nothing had happened. “How are you today, Kayla?” he asked. “Will told me you helped him out a lot last night.”

Kayla suddenly remembered how Will had cried into her hair the previous night. “Yeah. I think he had a bad dream or something. I heard him sniffling, so I went to make sure he was okay. He cried on my shoulder a little bit and then fell asleep. Nothing terrible happened or anything.”

Nico shrugged. “Well, it seemed to help him a lot. Thank you for helping him when he needed it.”

Kayla looked over at Will. He was blushing and staring at his Cheerios. “... Yeah, no problem. I like helping him.”

Will took a few bites of his food. “Thanks,” he mumbled. “I like helping you too.”

“Yeah.” She moved close to him. “Hey… can we talk? Like, alone?”

Will’s normally tanned, healthy face went deathly pale. “... Uh. Sure.”

Kayla stood up. He trailed her to a vaguely sunny, yet isolated spot on the beach. Kayla sat down under a tree, Will a few feet from her. “... So… what did you want to talk to me about?”

“I was wondering… uh.” Kayla shifted. “Gods, I don’t fucking know how to say this. Will… were you…?”

Will took a deep breath. His cheeks were turning a sick shade of lemon-lime. “... Was I… what?”

Kayla swallowed. “... Did someone… touch you… wrong?”

Will took a few heaving breaths. He gave a strange cough. When Kayla looked over, he was vomiting in the grass on his other side. She leaned in and put a hand on his back. “Hey, hey, deep breaths. I’ve got you.” She reached for the med kit at his hip. “Can I see your med kit?”

Will, still contorted in a “I just threw up and it might happen again” position, nodded. 

Kayla gently unclipped the med kit from its carabiner, careful not to touch his hip. She didn’t want to set anything off. She opened it and poked gently through the contents, band-aids, some Kit Kats, two Ace bandages… finally! Ambrosia! And a bottle of water! She broke off a small piece of the godly treat. “Okay. Can you stomach some water and ambrosia?”

Will slumped against the tree. He managed a nod. 

Kayla pressed it to his lips. Will took it, chewing slowly and carefully. Kayla gave him some water and then set her palms out in front of her. “May I hold your hands?”

Will took her hands. His hands were big and warm around hers, and the palms were soft. Kayla didn’t know how to tell Will how much she loved his hands without sounding creepy. She gently rubbed circles on the back of Will’s hands, as gently as she could. She didn’t have Will’s healing touch. Beyond the basics of first aid, medicine eluded her. She couldn’t look at someone and know instantly what health problems they’d had in the past and would have in the near future. But maybe, just once, she could make her touch soft enough to bring him some solace. 

Will took a few deep breaths. “... Thanks.” He sniffled. “... It helps.” His voice broke slightly.

“I’m glad,” Kayla whispered. “And… I’m sorry for bringing stuff up.”

Will took another deep breath, heaving slightly. “... It’s not a problem. You were just… you were just trying to figure out what was going on.” 

Kayla squeezed his hands. “Thanks.”

Will closed his eyes. “... I know this is a weird question, but may I put my head in your lap?”

Kayla patted her lap wordlessly, and Will lay down. She gently traced her fingers through his hair, over his shoulders, trying to soothe him. It was a long time before he spoke again. “... You were right,” he mumbled.

“About you being…?”

“Yeah.”

Kayla was silent for a long time. Rage boiled in her chest, her heart seized in anger and pain. She wanted to punch something. “I’m gonna need a name and an address.”

“He’s dead,” Will replied flatly. 

Kayla sighed. “Too fucking merciful.”

Will didn’t respond. He took a few deep breaths. Kayla forced down her rage and gently stroked his hair, tucking the wild curls behind his ears the best she could. He sniffled, and her eyes stung harshly. Poor, sweet Will. He didn’t deserve that.

Will pressed his face into her stomach and let out a few strained, sniffling sobs. Kayla was sure her heart physically broke in that moment. She stilled her hand in Will’s locks, tears spilling down her cheeks.

They must have dripped on Will’s face because Will whimpered and replied, “See, this is why I didn’t want to tell you! I didn’t want… I didn’t want to make  _ you  _ upset! I’m supposed to be the head counselor! I’m supposed to be the strong one! I’m not supposed to… to make you guys sad!”

Kayla took a deep breath and wiped her tears. “Will, I’d rather share your pain than see you try and struggle under it alone.” She stroked his hair. “Thank you for telling me.”

Will sniffled. Kayla could see the tension in his body, how much he was struggling not to cry. Kayla didn’t know how to reassure him, so she only sat with him, letting her own tears fall slowly over her cheeks, into her sleeve to prevent them falling onto Will. She stroked his hair as lightly as she could, tugging the curls gently into a somewhat fluffier fluff than before. Finally, Will raised his head, his eyes red. “Thanks,” Will whispered. “It… it means a lot.”

Kayla wiped her own tears and managed a smile. “No problem. Do you want to go back to breakfast? I’m sure your cheerios are soggy by now, but I’m sure I can get you something different.”

Will sighed. He sat up. “... Maybe.” He smoothed down his hair. “Ugh. You made my hair go bad.”

Kayla reached up and helped Will smooth his hair back down. “Better?”

Will’s ears turned pink. “Yeah.” He shook his head slightly. “I… I’m… not to pull a Nico, but I’m not very hungry anymore.”

Kayla studied him. “Okay. Do you want to sit here for a few more minutes and then maybe go to Arts and Crafts after breakfast or something? That’s usually pretty chill.”

Will took a deep breath. “... Yeah. I think I’d like that.”

  
  
  
  


Kayla led Will to the arts-and-crafts shed. 

Shockingly, Austin joined them. He had been locked in the cabin for the better part of the last week editing the song Kayla assumed he was writing for her birthday. But he fell quietly in step beside them. “Hey.”

“Oh, hey!” Kayla’s face lit up. “It feels like a million years since we’ve hung out.”

Austin managed a wan smile. Kayla could see cracks and exposed pink flesh on his lower lip. “... Yeah. Well, when I put down my sax and there was blood on the reed, I figured my lip needed a break.”

Kayla’s heart panged. “Will? Do you have a chapstick in your med kit?”

Will looked at her hazily, as if she wasn’t quite real. “... Uh? Oh, yeah, chapstick. Um…” He stared at the ground for a long time, his brow furrowed, “... Uh… no. It’s not… not hygienic to keep a shared chapstick. It spreads diseases. I keep a box of new ones in the infirmary, though.”

“It’s not that necessary,” Austin insisted. “I already put some chapstick on it. It’s fine.”

Kayla pursed her lips. “If you insist.”

Austin rolled his eyes. “You two are far too overprotective.”

“Better to be overprotective than underprotective,” Kayla laughed, pushing open the door of the arts-and-crafts shed. The Hermes cabin was already there. Lou Ellen was sitting against the right wall, doodling on a rock with a Sharpie. Cecil was watching her, his head on her shoulder. Alice was focused hard on a piece of paper. Julia was twisting some pipe cleaners between her fingers, a light brown one and a green one. She looked up, saw Kayla, choked and crushed the pipe cleaners in her palm. Her cheeks turned the color of ripe apples. “... Oh… hey.”

“Hey,” Kayla greeted back. She moved over to where Julia was sitting on a small stool in front of a low table, kneeling next to her. “Whatcha working on?”

Julia opened her hand, detangling the pipe cleaners. “Nothing. Just playing with some pipe cleaners. I’m not a good artist. Alice is much better, see?”

Kayla glanced over. On Julia’s other side, Alice was sitting, drawing a detailed picture of who she immediately recognized to be Percy Jackson. “Nice,” Kayla replied.

Alice blushed. “Thanks.”

“She thinks he’s hot,” Julia continued.

Alice blushed harder. “Shut up, Julia. At least I wasn’t making a pipe cleaner portrait of--”  
Julia caught her eye and made a throat-slashing motion.

“--Never mind,” Alice sighed.

“A pipe cleaner portrait of what?” Kayla asked. “And why did you crush it when Will and Austin and I came in?”

“Mind your own fucking business!” Julia snapped.

“Don’t yell at her,” Austin griped. “She doesn’t need to be yelled at.”

“Yeah, Julia, you don’t need to be so angry,” Cecil cut in. Kayla noticed he’d stopped leaning against Lou Ellen and had instead wrapped his arm around Will’s waist in a comforting manner. “Kayla was just curious.”

Julia threw up her hands. “Okay, okay! You don’t all need to yell at me at once! I’m sorry, Kayla.”

Kayla grinned. “No problem.” 

Julia, still blushing, turned back to entwining pipe cleaners around each other. She wasn’t making a portrait now, just some kind of circlet. 

Cecil and Lou Ellen studied Will. Finally, Cecil spoke. “I think I’m gonna take this one out of here. I don’t think he’s okay. I’m gonna get Nico and we’ll be in the Big House basement if you need us.”

Austin cocked his head. “What’s wrong with him?”

“Don’t know,” Cecil shrugged. “But whatever it is, I’m sure Will doesn’t want to explain it in front of everybody. Will, is it okay if I leave Julia in charge?”

Will just shrugged. 

“I’m taking that as a yes. Julia, you’re in charge.” He stood up, helping Will to his feet, and then did the same to Lou Ellen. He slung his arms over Will’s shoulder and Lou Ellen’s waist and left the shed. 

Kayla bit her lip. She grabbed a couple of pipe cleaners, a red one and a white one, and started twisting them around each other. 

Austin lay back against the wall. “Hey, what did you and Will talk about earlier?”

“It’s not important, Austin. Just a nightmare Will had last night. I wanted to see what it was about because he didn’t tell me last night,” Kayla murmured. “That’s all. Nothing big.” Kayla felt her hand begin to move against her will and she grabbed it and clamped it hard between her thighs, dropping the pipe cleaners.

Austin studied her, and when she didn’t slap herself, he shrugged and nodded. “Okay. I guess you’re right.”

There was a long pause. “So… Julia… how are you today?”

Julia shrugged. “Fine. How are you?”

Kayla shrugged. “I’m all right.”

Julia twisted the pipe cleaner around her finger. “... Hey… Kayla… did anyone ever tell you should sing professionally?”

“That’s actually my plan if the Olympics falls through,” Kayla laughed. “Austin and I are gonna be a singing-songwriting duo. He’ll do instrumentals and I’ll sing.”

“You can sing that well?” Alice interrupted.

“I… hope so,” Kayla shifted. 

“Sing for us!” Alice grinned. “I’ll draw you if you sing for us.”

Kayla looked at her paper. Alice had flipped over the drawing of Percy and was now sketching a small cartoon dog in a shirt and skirt with a cheery smile. “... Fine. I’ll sing for you. But this better be the best portrait anyone’s ever drawn of me.”

Alice grinned. “I’ll do my best.”

Kayla blushed, clearing her throat. Her stomach was turning flips. She rocked back and forth. 

_ “I don't mind where you come from _

_ As long as you come to me _

_ I don’t like illusions _

_ I can’t see them clearly _

_ I don’t care, no, I wouldn’t dare _

_ To fix the twist in you _

_ You’ve shown me eventually _

_ What you’ll do _

_ I don’t mind _

_ I don’t care _

_ As long as you’re here _

_ Tell me you’ll leave again _

_ You’ll just come back runnin’ _

_ Holding your scarred heart in hand _

_ It’s all the same _

_ And I’ll take you for who you are _

_ If you’ll take me for everything _

_ Do it all over again _

_ It’s all the same _

_ Hours slide, and days go by _

_ Till you decide to come _

_ And in between it always seems too long _

_ For certain _

_ And I have the skill, yeah, I have the will _

_ To breathe you in while I can _

_ However long you stay  _

_ Is all that I am _

_ I don’t mind _

_ I don’t care _

_ As long as you’re here _

_ Go ahead, tell me you’ll leave again _

_ You’ll just come back running _

_ Holding your scarred heart in hand _

_ It’s all the same _

_ And I’ll take you for who you are _

_ If you take me for everything _

_ Do it all over again _

_ It’s always the same.” _

Kayla hummed through the guitar solo, then continued.

_ “Wrong or right _

_ Black or white _

_ If I close my eyes _

_ It’s all the same _

_ In my life _

_ The compromise _

_ If I close my eyes _

_ It’s all the same _

_ Go ahead, say it! You’re leaving _

_ You’ll just come back running _

_ Holding your scarred heart in hand _

_ It’s all the same _

_ And I’ll take you for who you are _

_ If you take me for everything _

_ Do it all over again _

_ It’s all the same.” _ _   
_

Kayla finished, shifting. Julia was gripping her stool like it was the only thing keeping her from swooning and falling into either Kayla or Alice. Austin and Alice clapped. Kayla let out a sigh of relief. Even if Austin wasn’t a singer, it was always incredibly validating when he praised her singing. 

“How did you memorize all of that?” Alice asked, awed. 

“Apollo kids are good at memorizing lyrics,” Kayla shrugged. “And I’ve been listening to that song a lot lately.”  _ It reminds me of Lou Ellen. And Julia. Both of them really.  _

Alice laughed. “Man, that’s incredible. I’ve never memorized a song in my life. I think you’re just special, Kay.”

Kayla’s face heated up. “Nah, can’t be.”

Julia shifted. Her face was so red Kayla thought she was about to pass out. “I… I actually agree with Alice.” Her voice was softer than Kayla had ever heard it. “Your voice is… you could do professional singing. I’d listen to you.”

Kayla blushed even redder. “... Thanks.”

“I’m just happy you didn’t sing ‘Magnet,’” Alice sighed. “Julia sings that song so much, I would have gone crazy.”

“Nah,” Kayla shrugged. “Didn’t want to piss you off.”

“Although maybe it would be nice to hear it sung by someone who can actually sing,” Alice continued. “Julia’s voice sounds like shit.”

“I think her voice is nice,” Kayla defended. “I mean, yeah, it’s a little scratchy but she can hold a tune just fine. Definitely not the worst I’ve ever heard.”

Julia opened her mouth to speak, gasped a little, then pitched forwards. Kayla only barely caught her, managing to sling her over her shoulder.  _ Fuck, I hate it when I’m right. _ She was lighter than Kayla thought she would be. “I’m taking her outside. Air should bring her around.”

Alice looked at her, stunned. “... Okay.” 

Kayla carried her gently outside, not looking back to see the mischievous grin that Alice and Austin sent between each other. She lay her on the ground in a spot where she could get air. Kayla bit her lip. Gods, she wished Will and his med kit were here. Having ambrosia would really put her mind at ease.

Julia came around quickly. She took a shuddering breath. Her eyes flew open.

“Hey,” Kayla murmured. “How do you feel? What’s the last thing you remember?”

Julia blinked slowly. “... I… uh…” Her half-lidded eyes met Kayla’s. “... You have a beautiful voice.”

Kayla blushed. “Thanks. Yours is nice too.”

Julia looked at the sky for a moment. She sat up, slowly, then pitched backwards a little. Kayla caught her with a firm grip on her shoulders. “Whoa, there,” she replied. “Not too fast, you’ll pass out again.”

Julia leaned into her hands. “Yeah. Yeah. I’m… I’m okay.” She took a few deep breaths. “Yeah, it’s… I’m less dizzy now.”

It was a moment before Julia pulled away. She was warm to the touch, and her shirt was soft. Kayla could feel her bones beneath her skin. Her collarbones and neck were freckly. Come to think of it, she was freckly all over, at least from what Kayla could see. One of her braids was tickling the back of Kayla’s hand. Her braids were shining brilliant orange in the light. 

She looked nice in the light.  _ Really  _ nice.

Kayla almost breathed a sigh of relief when Julia finally pulled away, blushing slightly. “... Thanks.”

Kayla shrugged, feeling her own face warm. “... Yeah. No problem.”

They wandered back into the arts-and-crafts shed. Alice and Austin were grinning at them. “So… how’s your girl?”

“What?” said Julia and Kayla, nearly in unison. 

Alice and Austin burst into giggles. “Don’t worry about it,” Alice finally managed.

“You guys suck,” grumbled Julia. She turned. “I’m ditching your asses.”

“Come on, at least take  _ me  _ with you,” Alice whined. 

“No, you’re the worst of the lot,” Julia grumbled dramatically. She flounced out of the shed, slamming the door behind her.

“But  _ Juliaaaa!”  _ Alice grabbed her paper, folded it and ran for the door. 

Kayla grabbed her arm. “Hey, you were gonna draw me!”

Alice sighed. “... Yeah, you’re right. I just panic because sometimes when she runs I can’t find her for, like, hours.”

“I can help you find her,” Kayla shrugged. “It’ll be faster and funner with two of us.”

Alice grinned. “You’d do that?”

“Sure, why not?”

“Nice.” Alice led Kayla back to the table. 

Kayla sat down. “I’ve never been a model before.”

“Eh, it’s not much.” Alice pulled out a new sheet of paper and a pencil. “Just hold kind of still and smile when I tell you to.”

Kayla nodded. “I’ll try.”

  
  
  


The drawing turned out beautiful.

Drawn-Kayla looked beautiful, serene even. She had a small, shy smile. Her eyes were wide and soft. One strand of her hair was curled over her cheek. And wow, Julia was right, she  _ did  _ have a really cute nose. It was small and kind of round and upturned, but not in a pig-nose kind of way.

“This is way too flattering,” Kayla joked. “Can I take this?”  
Alice shrugged. “Hey, I like to emphasize the good features. And yeah, take it.”

Kayla smiled. “I’m gonna go hang this in my bunk right now. Thank you so much.” 

“You’re welcome,” Alice laughed. 

Kayla grabbed a piece of putty from a box in the corner and left the arts-and-crafts shed. She hung the picture in her bunk right between her bow-hook and a picture of herself, Will, Austin, Jerry, Gracie and Yan that she’d begged Chiron into taking for them on the last day of the last summer season. 

She looked at the clock they had on the far wall. Almost lunchtime.  _ I should get Will. I don’t know if he could hear the horn well in the Big House basement.  _ She left the cabin and jogged across the camp green, slipping into the Big House. Dionysus gave her a funny look from where he sat on the front porch, but then upon seeming to remember she was an Apollo kid and therefore had permanent infirmary access, went back to drinking his Diet Coke and playing Solitaire. She tiptoed to the basement and quietly called down the stairs, “Guys?”

“Kayla?” Nico replied. “That you?”

Kayla walked down the stairs and rounded some boxes. Nico was sitting on a battered leather couch, Will sprawled out across his lap halfway in the fetal position with his head and upper torso against Cecil, who was lying in Lou Ellen’s arms. Cecil and Will were both asleep. “Yeah, it’s me. How’s… how’s Will?”

“He’s okay. We watched  _ The Empire Strikes Back  _ and he fell asleep as soon as the movie ended. Cecil says that this always happens whenever he’s upset. Apparently these movies are his happy place or something,” Nico snorted. “I’m not a movie person--I’m too jittery for that, I like video games because they’re interactive--but I can make myself sit still for two hours if it makes Will feel better. And they’re not bad movies, honestly.”

Kayla shrugged. “Yeah, I’m not a movie person either. For the same reason, too.” She laughed. “Are we related or something?”

Nico sighed. “I hope not. I don’t want you to get the fate most of my relatives wind up suffering. You’re too good for that.”

“Sixteen I can remember,” Kayla reminded. “And I could easily be the next. My family’s as fucking cursed as yours if not worse. Now, are you four gonna come to lunch?”

Nico yawned. “... Yeah, I guess so. I’ll just have to wake up this lazy bastard first.” He shook Will slightly. “Hey,  _ scemo.  _ Wake up.”

Will groaned. He blinked, then pressed his face harder into Cecil’s chest. 

Lou Ellen shook her head a little, looked at Cecil and then at Kayla. “... I’m sorry.”

Kayla cocked her head. “Why? Oh, yeah, Cecil. Yeah, I… I don’t care. I can’t help it if you two are in love.” And somehow Kayla didn’t really feel anything from it. She expected to be heartbroken and sad, but… she wasn’t. It hadn’t even been a week. But… after spending the day with Austin and Julia and Alice and having that pretty picture drawn of her, she didn’t feel so bad. If she looked anything like how Alice portrayed her, it would work out. And if Julia thought her voice was beautiful, then…

Gods, what was she thinking? Julia had only been being nice to her for, like, four days. Someone could totally keep up a lie for four days.  _ Especially  _ a Hermes kid. But those tears she’d seen when Julia had confessed her love were real, or at least Kayla really, really thought they were. If it was a lie, it was a disgusting one. 

But she wouldn’t assume it was a lie. Suspicion wouldn’t help. She’d assume Julia was for real until proven otherwise. And besides, it was really helping her forget Lou Ellen. So in the end, even if Julia was being shitty, she was benefitting, and that was good, right?

Lou Ellen snorted. “We’re not dating, Kay. I don’t fucking know how to love.” She gave a somewhat despondent look, but shook it off quick.

Kayla shuffled. “... O… kay. Um… anyway… lunch?”

Lou Ellen yawned. “Yeah, yeah.” She shook Cecil. “Yo, asshole.”

Cecil snorted. “Ugh. What the fuck do you… oh, hey, Lou. You okay?”

“I’m good, but lunch is in a couple minutes,” Lou Ellen started, ruffling Cecil’s hair. 

Cecil rubbed between Will’s shoulders. “I’ll need this fucking sasquatch to get off me first,” he said fondly. 

Will groaned, but rolled into a sitting position. “What time is it?”

“Almost lunch,” Kayla replied. 

Will smiled at her a little. “Hey, baby Kay. How’d it go with arts and crafts?”

Kayla shrugged. “Fine. Alice drew me and it was pretty.”

A yawn escaped Will’s lips and he rubbed his eyes. “I’ll have to see it after lunch. Thanks for waking me.” He stood up, slinging an arm over Nico’s shoulder. 

Nico stiffened, then relaxed a little. “Yeah, no problem,” he mumbled. 

They stumbled sleepily to lunch. Will had let his arm drop and he and Cecil fell slightly behind the other three, which was weird, because they were usually the fastest. Lou Ellen turned to Nico. “Thanks for the talk earlier.”

Nico shrugged. “No problem. Look, none of the stuff your dad did was your fault. You’re not a bad person, Lou. I’ve known bad people. You’re not it. You’re just hurt, and the fact that you’re hurt makes you a  _ better  _ person in this case because you’re hurting for a friend. Don’t worry about yourself. You’re doing just fine.”

Lou Ellen swallowed. Her eyes were wet and her voice was barely above a whisper when she said, “Thanks.”

Kayla only stared at the ground and said nothing.

  
  
  


The rest of the day passed uneventfully. 

Kayla and Will had a tight hug after lunch. They said nothing. There was no need to say anything. When she pulled away, Will’s eyes were wet and she didn’t mention it at all. She showed him the picture Alice had drawn and it seemed to cheer him up. He said it was accurate, which made Kayla’s heart flutter in a good way. 

She practiced her shot for a while. It was calming. Valentina had showed up at one point, which was stressful because she was a _terrible_ shot and needed loads of assistance. She sat through one of Chiron’s lengthy, boring geometry lessons, checked on Austin, who had retreated to the cabin, and took some more shots. Dinner was uneventful. Nico tried to make Will eat with him and Mr. D, but Will refused.   
He was quiet through campfire, which sucked, because the chorus seemed so incomplete without Will’s tenor. Austin’s voice had only barely started to change and he was still on the low side of alto, and Kayla was a low soprano at best. And neither Nico or Cecil could sing. 

It took Kayla a while to sleep that night. Her birthday was the following day and frankly, she still had some childlike excitement in her at the possibility of presents and maybe some cake. Not to mention the attention she’d receive. 

Sue her. She didn’t have the parental attention most other kids got. 

However, when she did sleep, blessedly, she slept heavily, and had no dreams.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The first song referenced in this is the SirHamnet translation of "Magnet," available at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N50n3bNdtxI  
> The second song referenced in this is "All The Same" by the Sick Puppies  
> Also "scemo"="fool", at least according to Google Translate.


	19. Do All Large Houses Have Bathtubs In Them?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The first part of Kayla's birthday!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No real warnings, maybe a very light angst? But it's stuff that normal thirteen year olds would be angsty about.

She woke up and her heart immediately panged with excitement. Her eyes flew open and she sat up, fully anticipating there to be a box on her pillow like the previous night. 

There wasn’t one.

Her heart sank. Julia had gotten her hopes up about a birthday gift. She guessed it was a lie. Were her suspicions of the previous day correct? Was this just an elaborate and cruel prank? Was Julia really so cruel as to build her up only to shatter it all _on her birthday?_

She swallowed, wiped her forming tears and climbed down the ladder from her bunk. Will enveloped her in a hug as soon as she’d hit the ground. “Happy birthday, baby Kay.”

Kayla pressed herself into Will’s warm hug, tears spilling out of her eyes as of their own accord. She swallowed, biting her lip, trying not to make it obvious she was crying, because if she did then Will would be so concerned and she didn’t think she could handle that.

Of course, Will noticed anyway. “Oh, gods, Kay.” He pulled back, wiping her eyes with a gentle hand. “What happened? Nightmares?”

“... I’m sorry,” she sniffled. “It’s… it’s really petty, but Julia said she was gonna get me a present, and… and when I woke up, there’s no present. I… I… I know it’s petty but she… she _said…”_

Will gave her a soft smile. “She might be waiting to give you your present in person later, at breakfast. There’s plenty of time left in the day.” Will dried her tears with the hem of his tank top, revealing some of his freckled belly. “So no more tears, okay? There’s no reason for tears. Not yet.”

Kayla sniffled, leaning into his soft touch. “Thanks,” she whispered. “Thanks.”

Will pulled away, patting her shoulder. “No problem, Kay. You want the first shower?”

Kayla managed a watery grin. “I would. Thank you so much.”

“Or.” Will gave a conspiratorial smile. “I could sneak you into the infirmary and you could use the bathtub there. No one’s in at seven AM on a Thursday, and if they are, they aren’t bathing.”

Kayla raised her eyebrows. “Do you think I have time? Before breakfast, that is?”

Will thought about it. “I think so, yeah.”

Kayla gave an honest smile. “Awesome.” She pulled some clothes and toiletries from her footlocker. “Let’s go.”

Will smiled. “Okay.” He put an arm around her shoulder and led her from the cabin. “If anyone asks, you slept on your back wrong and it’s all achy and I’m helping you out, okay? Because you can’t possibly do demigod stuff if your back hurts.”

Kayla laughed. “Will do.”

They slipped into the Big House. Chiron spotted them as they slipped past the living room. “You two are up early.”

“Kayla has a backache, I’m getting her a nice bath.” Will sniffled, then sneezed hard. 

Chiron nodded. “Okay. When you get out of the bath, Kayla, I have something for you. Provided you didn’t strain your back too terribly.”

Kayla rubbed her back with her fist. “Ugh. Nah, I just slept on it wrong. I’ll be okay.” She felt her fist tingle and grabbed it with her other hand behind her back. 

Chiron gave her a smile. “Good. I’ll see you after your bath.”

Kayla let Will lead her to the bathroom of the infirmary. It was a reasonably typical bathroom from a large house, bathtub, toilet, sink. “Will?”

“Yeah?”

“Stupid question, but do all large houses have bathtubs in them?”

Will thought about it. “Well… maybe? It’s been a while since I’ve been in a large house that wasn’t this one, since I was seven or so, I think. But yeah, I think most large houses have at least one bathroom with a tub.”

Kayla shrugged. “Cool, I guess.”

“Anyway, I’ll see you in a few, I guess.” Will slipped out the door awkwardly. 

After bathing, she dried off quickly and dressed, purposefully not looking in the mirror, despite the fact that it wasn’t a full-length. She combed her hair--which took like thirty seconds, cutting most of it off was the best decision she’d ever made--and left the bathroom. The infirmary was empty in the quiet morning, which was weird but refreshing. She left the infirmary and walked to the living room where Chiron was still nursing his morning tea.

Chiron looked up, smiling. “Impatient, are we?”

Kayla managed a smile. “It’s never been my strong suit.”

Chiron rose off of where he was sitting on his haunches, flicking his tail. “Fates. Someone should have raised you better.” He shook his head. “Well, I would give you your usual, but to be frank, someone else already gave it to you. And I figured you’re a little too old to just get candy apples, anyway.”

“Wait, you gave…?”  
“Julia’s quite infatuated with you,” Chiron nodded. “She has been for a very long while. You have no idea how many times I told her to drop the bullying act and just confess.”

“Hold on, you knew about the bullying?”  
“Why do you think she was always on dish duty?”

Kayla thought about it. “I thought it was just because she was always doing stupid shit.”

Chiron shrugged. “That too, but frankly, I can’t _catch_ enough of her more impulsive actions to punish her for them. And it’s against my beliefs to punish her on suspicion alone. So yes, most of the punishments she received were because of her treatment of you. I counseled her to the best of my ability, but perhaps Dionysus could have done better, as I never could get through to her.” Chiron gave a small sigh, moving to the other side of the room, pulling a small box from an end table. “Although sometimes the Fates have special plans for those no one can reach. I’ve been around for thousands of years, I should learn to trust them.”

“I don’t blame you for not trusting the Fates,” Kayla sighed. 

Chiron just sighed. “I would be surprised if you still trusted the Fates after everything you went through.” He turned back to her. “Anyway, I think this is a more appropriate present for someone your age.” 

Kayla’s eyes were drawn to the box in his hand. “What is this?”

Chiron smiled, in that worn, kindly way of his. “Close your eyes.”

Kayla paused before doing as she was told. _Chiron wouldn’t hurt me._ She felt something touch her neck, cool and solid. Chiron put his hands on her shoulders. “Come now.”

She let him lead her, his hands warm and steady. “Okay. You may open your eyes.”

She opened her eyes. She was standing in front of a mirror on a vanity in a side room off of the Big House living room. Around her neck was a string of dark greenish pearls, darker than her hair, but still a wonderful color. They shone gently in the soft yellow light, warming as they touched her collarbones. She blinked rapidly.

“Do you like them?” 

“These… these can’t be real,” Kayla breathed. “They’re so pretty, they can’t be real.”

Chiron ruffled her hair. “I don’t demand much from the gods, but getting Poseidon to give me a string of green pearls wasn’t difficult. He’s got more than enough.”

Kayla made a strange choking sound, turned and threw her arms around Chiron’s neck, burying her face in his stubble. “... I love you,” she mumbled.

Chiron put his arms around her. “Happy birthday, Kayla.” And then in a much softer voice, “I love you, too.”

Kayla lingered in Chiron’s arms until the horn blew again. Chiron was solid and strong, he smelled like pine and old books and tea leaves. Kayla only ever read poetry, and even then it was rare, but it was still a pleasant smell nonetheless.

Chiron loosed her, gently unwrapping her arms from his neck. “Go eat. Put the necklace somewhere safe. I’m not getting you a new one if you lose it.”

Kayla smiled, staying on her tiptoes for just long enough to kiss Chiron’s cheek, and turned to leave. “Thank you. Seriously, thank you.”

“You’re welcome, Kayla.”

Kayla put the pearls back in their box and hid them under her pillow. 

It’s not like she felt she had to hide them from her brothers. She just didn’t want to see them damaged if an attack were to occur. Chiron, kindhearted as he was, wasn’t much of a gift-giver, Will usually didn’t have anything to give save his heart and soul, and Austin couldn’t usually give anything but music. 

Julia didn’t give Kayla the present at breakfast. 

She got birthday wishes from the others. Cecil, in typical fashion, gave her a tee shirt with _WOMEN LOVE ME, FISH FEAR ME_ written on it. Will apologized for him, but Kayla really didn’t mind. She knew Cecil only gave gag gifts. She was okay with it.

Nico had given her a green floppy hat, kind of a beanie type of deal. When she’d asked him why, as she’d never really worn hats, he just gave a small, sad smile and said he thought she’d look good in it. She didn’t question him any more.

After breakfast, Austin ushered her back to the cabin. Sweat was shining lightly on his brow. She took his hand. “Hey, it’s okay. Don’t worry.”

“How could you tell I was worried?”

“Because I know you,” Kayla smiled. “Also, you sweat when you’re nervous. Like, a lot. It’s kind of a problem.”

Austin blushed. He didn’t say anything, only led her into the cabin and sat her down on his bed. He shyly grabbed his saxophone from its case and pulled up a folding chair. Kayla bit back a smile and leaned in, closing her eyes and soaking it in. 

The song was a little different from Austin’s normal fare.

It was lower, sweeter in tone, a little softer, nowhere near his normal energetic fare. It had the energy of a day either in late or early summer, not the boiling and insufferable dog days, but the gentler days at the beginning and end, where it was okay to be outside for hours in the sun. Where you wouldn’t burn or itch. And the strawberries taste even sweeter and the juices run all over your chin. Kayla loved that. 

She shuddered a little when it ended, the feeling of coming down touching her every nerve. “That was…” She breathed softly, “... fantastic.”

Austin raised his eyebrows, hope blooming in his golden-flecked eyes. “It was?”

Kayla smiled. “Yeah. It was. It was beautiful.”

Austin let out a breath. “Oh, gods. Thank you so much.” He rocked back and forth, laughing a little. 

“You were worried, weren’t you?”

Austin’s eyes focused somewhere around Kayla’s scarred-up knees. “Yeah, I was.” He gave a nervous chuckle. “I don’t have any idea why I can play to enormous crowds and post my music to a channel where several hundred thousand people will see it and can be fine, but I can’t play a song for just one person without stress.”

Kayla shrugged. “I mean, you’ve learned not to worry about the opinions of strangers. But for people who care for you, it’s different, isn’t it?”

Austin thought about it. “I guess so.”

“But don’t worry about this one. You did really well, okay? Don’t fret.” She extended her arms. “Here, c’mere. Get a hug.”

Austin leaned into her hug, his breathing becoming soft and gentle as she held him. He pulled away after only a moment, smiling slightly and swallowing. “Thanks. That… that helped.”

“No problem,” Kayla smiled. 

There was a pause. Kayla’s heart felt a bit heavy. She still didn’t really trust Julia enough to just _assume_ that she would give her a present, and it hurt. She sighed. “You know, I’m just gonna go ask Julia if she has a present for me like she promised. I can’t stand the suspense.”

Austin cocked his head. “Okay. If she’s mean to you, please tell me, okay?”

Kayla grinned and stood up. “Will do, man.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can never tell how detailed I can go with bathtub scenes without it being weird. That's why I just cut it out this time. 
> 
> Also, I'm gonna be posting shorter chapters more frequently at the sacrifice of not covering one whole day in every chapter. I think it'll be better that way. Or at bare minimum, it'll be easier on me.

**Author's Note:**

> I dunno how this'll be received, but I wanted to write it anyway. It's a bit too long to go in my drabble doc--it's some 8k words by this point and it's not finished--but I still wanted to get it out there. I know this is kind of a weird rarepair to write for, but considering that I HC that Lou Ellen and Cecil are a year older than Will, and Will is about 16 in TON, then... yeah. I wanted to ship Kayla with someone closer to her own age. Now that I'm of legal age and shit it's made me think about some of the ships I have with larger age gaps. Julia is (assumed to be) younger than Will and more along the lines of Kayla's age of 12-13.
> 
> Anyway, sorry for rambling. Have a nice day. And if you've never read any of my other stuff, consider checking out my drabble doc. It's got some decent stuff, and more Solangelo, if that's the only reason you clicked on this fic.


End file.
